


Fly Me Home on a Paper Plane

by blowmeharry, captainhoran



Series: Fly Me Home [2]
Category: Little Mix (Band), One Direction (Band)
Genre: Cheating, Deception, F/F, F/M, Jealousy, M/M, two points of view
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-03-14
Updated: 2014-03-12
Packaged: 2017-12-05 06:21:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 43,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/719853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blowmeharry/pseuds/blowmeharry, https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainhoran/pseuds/captainhoran
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's been 13 years since Harry has seen Louis Tomlinson, and a lot of what he remembers is fading. Now in a steady relationship with the man he loves, he starts an internship at an ad agency. Life-long friend, Perrie Edwards, is in a much similar predicament in the fast paced world of fashion design.  Continuation of Fly Me Home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Internships

** H **

  
Harry wakes up to see beauty practically blinding him. It was a subtle beauty, a beauty he’d gotten used to. But it was a beauty, nonetheless. He’d woken up next to Charlie countless of times, but every morning still seems like the first. He let’s his hand graze Charlie’s cheek, soaking up the warmth through his palm. His hand flinches slightly when Charlie stirs, afraid he’s disturbed the boy.  
  
“Hmm, g’morning, charming.” Charlie yawns while he stretches.  
  
“Morning.”  
  
Charlie uses his whole body to wiggle toward Harry, snuggling into his chest. Harry practically swallows him when he wraps his arms around him. He smiles into the soft kiss the redhead bestows upon him.  
  
“I’ve got to get up.” Harry sighs.  
  
“Can’t you stay a bit longer?” Charlie asks, finger tracing Harry’s collar bone.  
  
“Don’t tempt me...” Harry’s voice trails off as Charlie’s lips make contact with his neck. “No, really, I’ve got that internship thing today.”  
  
“Fine... I’ll make breakfast, you shower.” Charlie takes a sheet to wrap around him and gets out of bed, grabbing his glasses and placing them on his face. Harry watches him leave, his eyebrows raised a bit. God, is he lucky.  
  
He rolls, quite literally, out of bed. He doesn’t bother covering up, he likes the feel of air on all parts of his skin. He also likes the feel of the cold, hard floor on his bare feet as he pads his way to the bathroom. The flat he has with Charlie has an open set up, so he watches his boyfriend of eleven months pull down some pans from the cabinets.  
  
He doesn’t bother taking too long in the shower. Normally he’d expect Charlie to join him, but he knows he has breakfast waiting for him. He passes a towel over his hair to dry it, but only does it apathetically. He likes the way his hair curls when he leaves it wet, so he shakes it and wipes his fringe to the side.  
  
He wraps the towel around his waist, tucking one end beneath the other. He sits at one of the bar stools in the kitchen area, letting his bare feet rest on the ledge beneath the counter.  
  
“Chocolate chip pancakes?” Harry asks excitedly. “Haven’t had these since my mum used to make them for me. Didn’t know you knew how to make these.”  
  
“She may have given me the recipe,” Charlie admits as he sets a stack in front of him. Harry smiles fondly at the sentiment.  
  
“You may be perfect,” Harry replies in whimsy.  
  
“Probably,” he concedes, sitting next to him with his own stack. “You’re not so bad yourself.”  
  
“I can kind of cook, but not really. I don’t have a job. I have an extra set of nipples, and my skin is blotchy. I’m far from ‘not so bad,’ and I’m definitely not perfect.” Harry cuts into his pancakes and wonders why Charlie has stuck with him for as long as he had.  
  
“Just keep those lips and what you do with them. You’ll go far.”  
  
“Cheeky!” Harry playfully punches Charlie on the shoulder.  
  
“You have that internship thing that starts today, right?” The syrup bottle sputters as Charlie empties it onto his breakfast.  
  
“Yeah. No pay though.” Harry doesn’t pause much between bites as he speaks.  
  
“Hmm, that’s okay. Once this whole internship thing is over, do you think they’ll hire you?”  
  
“Depends on my mentor, I think. They’ve got loads of interns starting. Not many job openings.”  
  
“I’m sure your mentor will love you.” Charlie plants a kiss on his cheek before picking up the plates and taking them to the sink. “Get dressed, or you’ll be late.”  
  
Harry walks over to his wardrobe and opens a drawer. He carefully assesses his choice of attire. He honestly wasn’t sure what was acceptable in clothing. He usually dresses casual, but was formal more appropriate? He opted for a mix of both; a white tee over black skinnies and white converse, with a blazer to tie it all together. He tugs on his silver necklace, letting the paper plane pendant fall out to the front.  
  
He looks at himself in the mirror, tugging on the side of his blazer. He tucks his necklace back behind his shirt, feeling personable about it. He had never told Charlie what it meant, and he’s not sure if he ever will.  
  
He slings his bag over his shoulder, full of his art supplies. Charlie’s found some pyjama bottoms and pulled them on while Harry was dressing. Suddenly, as Harry stares at Charlie’s smooth and beautiful chest, he finds it incredibly hard to leave.  
  
“Hey!” Charlie protests when Harry sneaks up behind him and wraps his arms around his waist. He feathers Charlie’s neck with kisses. “You’ve got to go, casanova.”  
  
“Ugh, fine. Promise to be here when I get home?” Harry pulls back and lets Charlie turn to face him, but his hands are still bracing his hips.  
  
“I’ve got rehearsal, and an afternoon shift. I’ll be home tonight, though. Promise.” Charlie’s hands trail up Harry’s biceps and end up on his shoulders. Harry watches Charlie’s blue eyes watch as his hands move, and is nearly knocked back when they meet his own eyes.  
  
Harry leans down and catches Charlie’s lips with his own, kissing him softly at first, but it deepens quickly. Their lips fit together perfectly, like pieces of a puzzle. Harry can’t help but smile at the thought, breaking the kiss just enough for him  to nibble on Charlie’s bottom lip.  
  
“I love you,” Harry says genuinely.  
  
“I love you, too. Now go, or you’ll miss the metro.” Charlie playfully pushes him away and to the door.  
  
Harry smiles the whole way down the lift and his whole walk to London’s underground transport. His thoughts are full of red hair and soft lips his whole ride to the ad agency he’d received an internship for.  
  
He hums a happy tune as he rides up the lift. There are a few people around him, but he doesn’t care. The day had started out great, and he’s going to keep it great. There’s a loud ding, and Harry finds the lift open to the level he’s supposed to be on.  
  
“Perfect,” he mutters to himself. He hardly notices the man next to him who is exiting the lift at the same time. They collide when they try to walk in the same space of mass. “Oh, I’m sorry! I didn’t see you there, mate.”  
  
He watches as the papers that had flown from the man’s hands settle on the floor around him. He quickly kneels to help him, and is struck by a memory of being surrounded by paper as a child. He gathers the parchment and taps the bottom of the stack on the floor, to straighten the pile.  
  
“Here you go,” Harry says politely as he hands the paper to him. The man nods swiftly as he takes the paper. He smiles gratefully at Harry before scurrying away.  
  
He wanted to ask him where he was supposed to go, but can’t now that he’s gone. He looks around for someone that can help him, but sees a paper pinned to a bulletin board in front of him.  
  
“Ah, this will do.” He follows the instructions.  
  


**P**

  
“Harry, I’m so nervous...” Perrie tries her hand at multitasking. She has her phone pinned between her shoulder and ear, and her hands are busy trying to open a jar of jam. “Are you already there?”  
  
“Yeah,” Harry says over the phone. “It’s so great, there are cubicles and office stuff everywhere!”  
  
“Sounds nifty. It’s so cool how we’re starting our internships on the same day.” The lid pops open and she does a slight wiggle of her hips in victory, the bottom of her tights sliding around on her hardwood floor. “You met your mentor yet?”  
  
“Nah, just a lot of orientation and what not today.”  
  
“Hmm, fun. I think I’ll meet mine today, from what I’ve heard.” She licks her fingers after a bit of jam sticks to them.  
  
“You nervous, then?”  
  
“So nervous. Weren’t you listening?” Perrie scrunches her brows together, even though she knows Harry can’t see them. “Anyway, I’m more thinking about you. Tonight’s the big night, yeah? One year?”  
  
“Yeah, I’ve got loads planned.” Perrie could hear the excitement ringing in Harry’s voice.  
  
“Did he say anything?” She asks, spreading the jam on the freshly toasted bread Zayn had just handed her. She mouthed her thanks at him.  
  
“No, but there’s no way he’s forgotten. He’s too perfect for that.”  
  
“What if he has?” Perrie grabs her phone and repositions her head in a normal position.  
  
“I don’t know... Maybe I’d be a bit devastated. Is that bad?”  
  
“No, that’s perfectly acceptable. I mean, anniversaries are important! Especially the first year,” Perrie consoles. She bites into her toast and walks over to the other counter, leaning against it on her elbows.  
  
“Thanks, Pez. I’ve got to go, we’ve got more briefing or some shit. Lots of love.”  
  
“Kisses!” She hangs up and wipes at the crumbs she’s paranoid made their way to her chin.  
  
“Harry?” Zayn asks, wrapping his arms around her and resting his chin on her shoulder.  
  
“Who else?” Perrie giggles as she leans into him.  
  
“Hmm, it could have been Danielle. Or Jesy, or Leigh Anne. Or maybe even—”  
  
“Alright, alright. You’ve made your point.” Perrie finished the last bit of her toast. “You off, then?”  
  
“Yeah, I’ve got an early lecture. Kill me now.”  
  
“You’re the one that chose med school,” Perrie reminds him.  
  
“I suppose. Love you.” He leans in and kisses her goodbye.  
  
“Me, too.” She smiles as she watches him leave. Shouting, because she’d nearly forgotten, she says, “Don’t forget we’ve got plans with Dani and Liam tonight!”  
  
Zayn waves in recognition before exiting.  
  
With the flat to herself, Perrie turns on the music full blast. She dances wildly as she readies herself for her first day in the fashion business. She holds up necklaces to herself in front of the mirror, throwing the rejects onto her bed. Earrings, they have to be perfect. She holds them up to her ears, settling for the classic silver hoop. Her purple dress is simple, but studded perfectly with her jewelery choice and a lavender blazer on top. She chooses a pretty brooch to adorn the blazer, an amethyst crystal settled in the middle. Her tights match her blazer, and she chooses classic black boots as footwear.  
  
She does her make up to the sultry tunes of Demi Lovato in the background, singing along to every lyric. When she’s not painting her lips, that is. When she’s finished, she looks over her face, puckering her lips to be sure the gloss won’t smear.  
  
“Hmm, hair. What do I do with you?” She likes to talk to herself, it brings her comfort. “I’m thinking a nice bun for a first impression.”  
  
She throws her hair on top of her head, tying it in a ponytail first. She strategically wraps her hair around itself, ending with a heavy coating of hairspray.  
  
“There. They’re going to love you.”  
  
She wishes her stomach would stop that nausea thing it does when she’s nervous, but there’s no time to back out now. With one last swift look in the mirror, she grabs her purse and exits the flat, turning all the lights off before locking the door.  
  
She stands in front of the building, muttering happy thoughts and encouraging words to herself. It takes a few seconds before she gains the courage to walk inside, her legs shaking in spite of herself.  
  
“Hi,” she says weakly to the receptionist. “I’m, um, here for the internship.”  
  
“Perrie Edwards?” The receptionist asks warmly.  
  
“That’s me! Present and accounted for. Right on time and everything.” Perrie has to take deep, shaky breaths to calm herself. Her mind is abuzz with everything that could possibly go wrong today.  
  
“Let me call her for you.” The receptionist looks down at some papers in front of her and lifts up the phone. Perrie rocks back and forth on her feet as her eyes wander around the vast room, large windows and chandeliers catch her eye. “Yes, Mrs. Hunter? Your intern is here. Alright, I’ll send her your way.”  
  
Perrie looks down at her, wide eyed.  
  
“She’s waiting for you. Top floor, just on the right. You can’t miss it.”  
  
“Thanks so much! What’s your name?” Perrie asks as she heads toward the lift.  
  
“I’m Linda. Good luck, Perrie.”  
  
Perrie reflects on Linda’s tone as she rides the lift upward. She fiddles with the bulky jewels on her necklace, and is surprised when she finally hears a ding signaling her exit.  
  
“Just on the right...” Perrie glances and immediately wants to cry. She boldly steps into the large office. “Erm, hello?”  
  
“Yes, yes, hello there.”  
  
“Hi, I’m here for—”  
  
The lady lifts a finger in the air, pressing her ear into the phone. “No, no, I told you they need to be here today. No exceptions.”  
  
Perrie busies herself by examining the walls. There are frames of Vogue magazine covers and other popular fashion magazines. A few of them are signed by the celebrity models on the covers.  
  
“Perrie?”  
  
Perrie is immediately ripped from her dream-like state. She turns all of her attention to the lady in front of her.  
  
“Yes, ma’am?”  
  
“I am Mrs. Hu—”  
  
“Oh, I know who you are. You’re like my idol. Best of the best.” Perrie instantly feels nauseous at the face Mrs. Hunter makes when she interrupts.  
  
“I will be your mentor. And as you are my intern, I expect no more interruptions.”  
  
Perrie waits a few seconds before she’s sure her mentor has finished speaking. “Yes, ma’am.”  
  
“Alright, let’s show you around, then.”  
  
Perrie is taken on a tour, from the art studios to the sewing area where prototypes are built.  
  
“This is... What was your name again?” Mrs. Hunter looks down at Perrie with a wrinkled nose.  
  
“Perrie,” she informs her.  
  
“Perrie, my new intern. Everyone say hello!”  
  
Perrie waves nervously at the sewers who are busy at work. There’s one girl in the back who waves politely back at her, but the rest remain stoic and unnoticing.  
  
“Alright, Terrie, I’ve got loads of things to do. Now, if you wouldn’t mind fetching me some coffee, do it. Even if you do mind, get me some coffee.” Mrs. Hunter waves her off.  
  
“It’s Perrie,” she mutters under her breath as she stalks away to a nearby coffee shop. She expected to be learning things, not this.  
  


** H **

  
Charlie isn’t home when Harry gets there, as expected. Rather than being disappointed in the lack of his boyfriend, Harry decides to seize the opportunity to be a sappy and romantic fuck. He wants to avoid doing anything too cliche, like a candlelight dinner or even handing Charlie flowers and chocolates, but his mind is blank. The more he worries about the night, the more he’s convinced that Charlie’s forgotten all about their special night, all about him altogether.  
  
And that’s all it really takes for Harry to maneuver himself into the kitchen, ready to indulge into something, anything, to get him to relax. He spends the next panicked seconds struggling to make a decision; what to make? He knows all of Charlie’s favourites, his distaste for most exotic foods, his love for the simple dishes as well as the more intricate. Harry smiles warmly at the next thought that crosses his mind. He truly knows everything about Charlie.  
  
He sets aside the thought of food for now, instead, focusing his efforts on the events of the evening. In the end, he decides he might as well go for the cliche: a candlelight dinner. Still, his creative instincts kick in, and he insists that he needs to go further than that. He knows he can do much better.  
  
It takes him a good ten minutes to scope through their flat for candles, until he finds a cheap pack of a dozen candles. With a shrug, he begins to set up. It takes another ten minutes for him to find a proper blanket (one without any distinct pattern and acquiring a shade of red, all opinions made with the eyes of an artist) and lie it across the floor accordingly. When that’s good and done with, he surrounds the blanket with the candles, careful that they are kept a safe distance away from the fabric. After lighting the candles and capturing a new kind of essence to the room, he surveys the sight in front of him, smiling with half-satisfaction; there’s something missing.  
  
The food.  
  
Harry’s survival instincts kick in instantly as he mumbles swears under his breath, dropping himself into a chair and rubbing his hands across his face anxiously. Leave it to Harry to leave the most important task until the last minute.  
  
“Okay, get it together,” Harry begins to speak to himself, a habit he’s picked up from Perrie. “Charlie’s going to be home any minute now. Think, think, think...”  
  
Harry’s not a terrible cook, but you would never see him cooking on BBC Two either. He stares at his options in the refrigerator for a whole five minutes before deciding that it’s too late to rummage through his recipes hiding somewhere in their flat. He only knows a few recipes by heart, most of them having been pounded into his memory so many times he’d have to erase his mind to forget them. Bearing that in mind, he still doesn’t know of anything romantic, and he won’t magically learn one in the next ten minutes. Speaking of which, where is Charlie?  
  
Instead of worrying about the boyfriend himself, Harry continues to focus on dinner matters, finally coming to terms that he’s going to have to go with something simple. Hopefully Charlie would accept that and focus more on their anniversary than the food. That’s what it was all about, right?  
  
He grabs the toastie maker from the top shelf in the cabinet. He smiles when he thinks about how Charlie always has to ask him to grab it for him because he’s too short. Harry opens the fridge and frowns. There’s cheese to be spared, but all different kinds. Harry sighs and makes all different kinds of toasties, from mozzarella to cheddar. He glances nervously at the clock. How late do rehearsals usually last?  
  
Harry sits on the blanket, tapping restlessly on the ground. He’s halfway through a toastie when Charlie comes bursting in.  
  
“Hey, darling, sorry I’m late... Oh.” Harry watches as Charlie takes in the scene before him. “Oh my god.”  
  
“Too much?” Harry asks nervously, suddenly wanting to take everything and throw it in the garbage.  
  
“No, it’s perfect... I may have gone overboard.”  
  
Harry wrinkles his brow. How? He didn’t have anything with him. He watches Charlie exit the flat again and return moments later with a giant bouquet of roses.  
  
“What even...” Harry stands and walks toward him.  
  
“Wait,” Charlie says, lifting a finger. He disappears momentarily before returning with a comically sized teddy bear.  
  
“Charlie...”  
  
“I didn’t know what you’d like, so I got one of each.”  
  
“And I made you toasties.”  
  
“My favorite,” Charlie admits, grabbing the front of Harry’s shirt and pulling him in for a kiss. “You’ve already been eating.”  
  
“You took too long, I was hungry,” Harry explains.  
  
“Champagne, too?” Charlie asks when he sits on the blanket excitedly.  
  
“It’s cheap, but yes.” Harry rubs the back of his head.  
  
“It’s thoughtful,” Charlie tells him. He takes a toastie and bites into it. “Happy Anniversary.”  
  
“Happy Anniversary,” Harry replies, tapping his toastie against Charlie’s.  
  
Harry pours the champagne into plastic cups as Charlie continued eating. Perfect, God-like, everything he ever wanted. That was Charlie, but those words could hardly explain how he feels about the boy.  
  
“A whole year...” Charlie breathes when Harry hands him the plastic cup.  
  
“Kind of scary,” Harry admits.  
  
“When you think about it...” Charlie sips on his champagne, lost in thought. Harry scoots closer so that their knees are touching. “Seems like only yesterday I met you.”  
  
“That was so embarrassing.” Harry hides his face in the hand that isn’t holding his champagne.  
  
“I thought it was charming.”  
  
“Charming? I made a fool of myself.” Harry loses himself in memories of sweaty palms and a dirty dancefloor.  
  
“I saw you from the stage...” Charlie brushes Harry’s forearm with his fingertips.  
  
“Love at first sight?”  
  
“Hardly,” Charlie scoffs. “I wanted to make fun of you.”  
  
“You did a real stand up job, mate.”  
  
Charlie’s hand falls to Harry’s lap, and he lets it trail up his thigh. “So I pulled you up on stage and...”  
  
“Pulled my pants down.” Harry puts a hand over the one Charlie’s sent roaming.  
  
“It was funny,” Charlie says in defense. “Hmm, then I saw what you were packing down there. That’s when it was love at first sight.”  
  
“I see.”  
  
“Of course, that’s not the only reason I love you. There’s all these little things that drive me mad.” The candlelight did wonders for the shape of Charlie’s face, his cheekbones cast dark shadows.  
  
“Mad?” Harry raises his brows as Charlie scoots even closer somehow, their legs beginning to intertwine.  
  
“Clinically.”  
  
Harry leans in, brushing his lips against Charlie’s cheek. He kisses the corner of his mouth, and then his chin. “Tell me.”  
  
Charlie grabs onto Harry’s face and kisses him furtively, causing Harry to melt into the shape of everything that was his lover. He pulls away and whispers into Harry’s ear, “maybe I’ll sing it to you.”  
  
“What?” Harry shakes his head, confused as to what the hell Charlie was implying. He shifts when Charlie moves away from him and walks away. It’s only seconds later that he returns with his guitar in hand. “No... You didn’t.”  
  
“I did.”  
  
“Fuck you, you romantic sap!” Harry laughs and punches Charlie in the shoulder.  
  
“Can that wait until after I sing?”  
  
“Ha.”  
  
“This isn’t because I love you, it’s just because I want to get you naked,” Charlie jokes as he strums the beginning chords.  
  
“You’re doing a spectacular job, I’m surprised my clothes are still even on.”  
  
“When you kiss me, it’s so hard to breathe,” Charlie sings. “But every breath is for you, so I’m fighting through. I know it’s kind of scary, but I love you, Harry.”  
  
Harry’s breath catches in his throat at the jogging memory, a series of memories flying in his mind. He remembers the first time he’s had the honour of listening to that powerful, beautiful voice. It was a charity show, nothing big, and Harry had decided to show up just for the hell of it. Never did he think he would meet someone so significant at such a meaningless event, even if he humiliated him in front of everyone. And now hearing Charlie sing to him, singing a song that he wrote himself, for him,  brings a genuine smile to his face, his eyes twinkling with love and passion and everything else he feels toward Charlie; he wants this moment to last forever.  
  
“And it’s you, that I want to come home to for the rest of my life. You are my tomorrow, but we’ve still got tonight.”  
  
Harry watches as Charlie continues the song, his heart fluttering like a fucking butterfly on steroids.  
  
Charlie smiles up at him as he sings out every note, “and it’s me, you’ve helped to—shit!” He shouts the last part as Harry tackles him, quite roughly. Charlie sets his guitar to the side for safe keeping.  
  
“Sorry,” Harry says between kisses. “I can’t,” another kiss, “keep my,” and another, “hands off of you.”  
  
“I wasn’t done yet!” Charlie’s complaints are muffled through Harry’s excessive lip locking, but he laughs anyway.  
  
Harry moves again, not caring about the mess of champagne he’s made on the blanket.  
  
“Harry, the candles! Fire!” Charlie pushes him away as he tries to put out the fire Harry had caused.  
  
“Shit!” Harry bats at the open flame that had made its home on the now-ruined blanket. He gets up quickly, grabbing his empty plastic cup and makes a mad dash for the sink. The fire is mostly out by the time he returns, but he pours water on it for good measure. He spills some on Charlie in the process. “... Sorry.”  
  
“It’s okay,” Charlie assures as he wipes the wetness from his face.  
  
“No it’s not, I’m clumsy...” Harry plays with the rim of his cup, his face a bit sullen.  
  
“I’ll say,” Charlie says as he stands and steps closer to him. Harry half-heartedly pushes him away.  
  
“You’re supposed to make me feel better about that shit.”  
  
“Oh.” Charlie’s forehead finds the crook of Harry’s neck, and his left hand finds his middle. “I’m still with you, aren’t I?”  
  
“By some miracle,” Harry sighs.  
  
“Do you think,” Charlie’s hand slides up Harry’s shirt, and his nose skims his jaw, “some wild and kinky sex will make you feel better?”  
  
“It’s a start.” The corners of Harry’s lips twitch up in a smile, and Charlie guides him to the bed by the front of his shirt.  
  
Harry lands on his back and grins widely as Charlie climbs on top of him. Harry’s hand slides up the back of his shirt, and he licks a trail from the bottom of his neck to his chin. Harry moans when Charlie pays him back by pulling his head to the side and sucking on his earlobe.  
  
Charlie’s hands are hungry, and devour every last inch of Harry’s chest and neck. He sits up quickly and pulls off Harry’s shirt, followed by his own. Harry unbuckles Charlie’s belt and his hands slide in behind, squeezing firmly.  
  
“You want me to ride you, or fuck you?” Charlie asks when he drops back down to Harry’s level, one hand beneath him and inside Harry’s pants, and the other wrapped in Harry’s hair.  
  
“Fuck,” Harry’s sentence is cut off by a long, drawn out kiss, “me.”  
  
Charlie bites onto Harry’s lower lip and pulls on it, letting it go with a slight pop. His pants have fallen down a bit, gathering at his thighs that are pinned between Harry’s own thighs. Charlie is working a lot of friction in Harry’s pants, leaving the boy a bit restless.    
  
Harry moves his hands up Charlie’s back, brushing it lightly with his fingertips. He moves them down again, this time dragging his nails into the flesh, white lines turning into red.  
  
“Shit,” Charlie seethes, biting hard into Harry’s neck. He moves his mouth lower, sinking his teeth on Harry’s chest. There is definitely going to be a bite shaped bruise there in the morning.  
  
Harry is finding it difficult to breathe, and his legs remain restless in their denim prison.  
  
“Fuck me,” he repeats, a bit more urgently this time. Charlie nods and kicks off his jeans, moving away just enough so Harry could do the same, along with his boxers. Harry sits up and kisses Charlie again, leaving his mouth bruised. He wraps one hand around Charlie’s cock, pumping furiously during their makeout session, eliciting moans from the other boy into his own mouth.  
  
Charlie aggressively pushes Harry back onto the bed, reaching over him to get into the drawer of their nightstand. He pulls out a condom and their trusty bottle of lube. Harry loves to be dominated, and Charlie knew exactly how to do it.  
  
After teasing Harry with the good ol’ one finger, then two fingers trick, Charlie rolls a condom onto his dick. He looks into Harry’s eyes just as the feeling of his tip strikes him. Harry’s breath can’t help but hitch slightly as the all too familiar pressure comes into play. He relaxes his muscles to reduce the stinging pain it causes, that he’s practically numb to nowadays.  
  
Harry’s nails do more damage to Charlie’s back, possibly even drawing some blood. He lets them jerk into Charlie’s skin with every thrust until—  
  
“Fuck!” Harry makes a sizable mess on Charlie’s, and his own, stomach.  
  
“Almost,” Charlie breathes, still fucking Harry senseless. Harry’s toes were curled from his orgasm as he rides it out through Charlie’s continuation. Harry yanks a bit on Charlie’s hair as he moves his hips to meet his lover’s. Charlie falls onto Harry and buries his face into his neck on the final thrust, relishing in the feeling.  
  
Harry lets his hand fall heavily onto Charlie’s back, causing the boy to cringe from the stinging sensations the scratches had caused.  
  
Charlie pulls out of Harry and walks to the bathroom to dispose of the condom. He returns with a towel and tosses it at Harry, who promptly wipes off his stomach. Charlie joins him on the bed again, snuggling under the covers and into his side.  
  
“Feel better?” He asks.  
  
“Definitely,” Harry replies. “We should clean up the mess on the floor.”  
  
“Leave it, I’ll get it in the morning.” Charlie places a hand on Harry’s chest so that he won’t move.  
  
“I love you,” Harry says, taking the hand in his as he turns on his side.  
  
“Love you, too.”  
  


** P **

  
“Smashing,” Perrie describes dramatically when Danielle and Liam walk into the restaurant.  
  
“Oh, stop, you feed my ego.” Danielle teasingly flips her hair and rolls her eyes. She kisses Perrie on both cheeks before sitting down across from her, with Liam at her side.  
  
“Hi, Liam,” Perrie greets with a smile.  
  
“Hey.” His return smile deserves some kind of fancy award.  
  
“How’s your internship?” Danielle inquires.  
  
“Oh, here we go.” Zayn mockingly groans, earning a playful punch from Perrie.  
  
“It’s dreadful, Dani. I haven’t learnt a single thing since I started.”  
  
“Why’s that?” Danielle takes her menu and reads over it carefully.  
  
“My evil witch of a mentor, if you can call her a mentor, makes me do all of her errands. She makes me carry her stuff, makes me run for her coffee, she even made me fire someone for her.”  
  
“Wow, that sounds awful,” Liam admits.  
  
“Oh, she’s not done,” Zayn assures.  
  
“And to top it all off,” Perrie continues her ranting. “She still hasn’t learnt my name properly. I’m Mary, Terry, even Jerry. Do I look like a Jerry?”  
  
“No... Perhaps a Terry.” Danielle unfolds her napkin and places it on her lap. “Maybe a Mary, but I’m not seeing it.”  
  
“Right?” Perrie groans and stares down at her menu. She’d hardly noticed Zayn and Liam are in an avid conversation themselves over the last football match. She sighs, looking over the drink menu. “I haven’t had a drink in so long.”  
  
“You deserve one after the day you’ve had,” Zayn tells her, patting her shoulder softly.  
  
Perrie smiles. “I suppose. It’s a process, really. Sooner or later I’m gonna make it to the top.”  
  
“That’s the spirit!” Danielle cheers while looking at her menu. “Hmm... Liam, what are you getting?”  
  
Liam turns away from Zayn, his face bright red from laughing so hard. “Um, I dunno... I ate like an hour ago.”  
  
“Liam!” Danielle groans, though the smile on her face is far from unhappy; Danielle could never be angry with Liam. Perrie sees them as the power couple in her group of friends. Not only have they have known each other since secondary school, but they had gotten together the first year of college, and they’ve been together ever since. It brings an endearing smile to Perrie’s face; she supports them completely, and in a way, she’s jealous of the authentic bond they share. It isn’t that she doesn’t have that with Zayn, but Liam and Danielle seem to compliment each other in a way she and Zayn can’t.  
  
“What?” Liam begins to chuckle. “This bloke spilled his beer all over my jeans, and I had to go home and change.”  
  
“So?”  
  
“So it’s a long drive back, and I was hungry.”  
  
Danielle shakes her head disapprovingly. “Men and their stomachs. At least get something to drink?”  
  
“I’ll probably get a strawberry lemonade. Or cherry soda.”  
  
Zayn slumps back in his seat, accidentally hitting Perrie’s side. He mutters a quick apology before saying to Liam, “You know, I find it kind of ironic that you work at a bar when you don’t even drink.”  
  
Liam shrugs, indifferent toward Zayn’s comment. “Drinking is gross.”  
  
Perrie’s eyes revert to the side to see a young lady waving at her. She frowns with confusion, but waves back nonetheless. She looks familiar, but Perrie can’t figure out where she’s seen her before.  
  
“There’s nothing wrong with being straight-edge,” Danielle says to Zayn. “Maybe you should try it.”  
  
                                                                                                                                                     ~~  
  
“Only the whites, Harry!” Perrie reminds him, instantly having a pink blouse tossed at her. She crinkles her eyebrows with worry for a second, wondering whether it’s a good idea for them to mix their clothes together.  
  
(“I’m going to murder you,” Harry had said over the phone. “These jeans barely fit me. I can hardly breathe. I’m going to become a puddle before I can even fit in lunch.”  
  
“Oh, please.” Perrie had rolled her eyes. “They’re no better than the ones you own.”)  
  
She smiles at the memory, tossing a white t-shirt into the washing machine. Clapping her hands together, she looks at the pile of clothes in the green basket, seeing that it’s gotten remarkably smaller, thankfully.  
  
“We’re almost done.” She stretches her hands, feeling accomplished with herself. “So tea?”  
  
“Yeah, just—let me put my sugar in this time.”  
  
Perrie rolls her eyes, grasping onto the side of the washing machine to lift herself up. “Sometimes I feel like you’re getting old too fast.”  
  
“Because I don’t want to risk getting diabetes, is that it?” Harry snaps back.  
  
Perrie smiles almost right away, knowing how much her friend hated the thought of growing up. “Sorry, sometimes I forget you’re not that same timid kid I knew many years ago.”  
  
“Oh, shut it. I might have been a little naive, but I was a kid.”  
  
“And you haven’t changed a bit.” Perrie pats him on the shoulder before making way to the kitchen. Knowing Harry’s flat inside and out, she finds the kettle in the bottom cabinet next to the oven and sets it over the stove, feeling undeniable thirst after all that hard work. She goes ahead and heats a couple of scones as well, and a few seconds after the microwave made the final sounds of completion, Harry comes rushing into the room, dropping himself into a chair lazily.  
  
Perrie brings the glasses over to the table in a tray, pushing the chair out beside Harry. She scoots into the table, leaning on her elbow and taking her first sip. “So, how was the anniversary?”  
  
“It went well,” Harry responds, nodding. “Charlie is so perfect. I don’t know why I try so hard—I can’t even achieve half of his perfection. Sometimes I feel like a terrible—”  
  
Perrie cuts him off with a sharp sigh. “Let me guess, you made sandwiches?”  
  
“Toasties.”  
  
Perrie nods with understanding.  
  
“He didn’t seem to mind, though. Even after I practically set our flat on fire.”  
  
“You what?” Perrie’s eyes widen.  
  
“It was an accident! I knew it was a bad idea to set the candles next to blankets, or anything flammable, for that matter. But eh,” Harry says with a shrug.  
  
“Well,” Perrie raises her eyebrows and takes a longer sip of her tea, wrinkling her nose with distaste, and pouring in more sugar, “that’s certainly original. And how was the sex?”  
  
Harry gives her that look, that don’t you think that’s a little personal look, but it subsides instantly because what doesn’t Perrie know about him? “Outstanding.”  
  
“I figured.”  
  
Harry reaches for the sugar, but Perrie’s hand stops him.  
  
“Not so fast, old man.”  
  
Harry glares at her, darkly. “Fuck off.” He snatches the sugar bowl from her, putting about two spoonfuls of sugar into his tea.  
  
“Wow,” Perrie pretends to act amazed as she watches the substance mix into the liquid.  
  
“How’s the internship?” Harry asks once he’s done mixing.  
  
“It’s okay,” she answers honestly. “It could be worse, I guess.”  
  
“I kind of like mine, even though it’s only been three days.”  
  
“My mentor gets on my nerves.”  
  
“I’ve got a lot of mentors, it’s weird,” Harry says nonchalantly. “Like, they’ll pass me around between all these people. They’re all really nice and helpful, even though I feel a bit out of place. I think they’re gonna set me up with a more stable one soon. There was this one bloke, yesterday. I’d seen him around before, and talked to him and what not. He was a bit too nice.” He looks down at his drink.  
  
Perrie frowns. “Too nice?”  
  
The boy shrugs. “He might have kissed me in the copy room yesterday... It was kind of random, really. One minute we were talking and laughing, and then it happened.”  
  
“Harry,” she begins to say after sighing with surprise.  
  
“He was like, ‘Oh god, I’m so sorry. My best mate is always telling me I should live in the now. Fat lot of good that advice was.’ And yeah.”  
  
“It couldn’t have just happened like that,” Perrie insists, not truly buying this watered-down version of the story.  
  
Harry keeps his eyes on the table, looking somewhat ashamed. “I may have flirted with him a few times, but I didn’t mean to lead him wrong.”  
  
Perrie takes a bite of her scone, thinking hard about the advice she would give. “I think you should ignore him. Or you know, avoid him as much as possible. You should also tell Charlie. There shouldn’t be any secrets between you.”  
  
“Yeah,” Harry says, nodding. “I’m going to.”  
  
“And I’d hate for you to lose Charlie over something like this. Or even your job, who knows.”  
  
“Yeah,” Harry agrees, finally making eye contact with his best friend. “Yeah, don’t worry. I’ll fix this.”  
  


**H**

  
Harry enters the ad agency with a slight spring in his step. It’s day four of his internship, and he knows his way around a lot better now. That knowledge, and the amazing boy he’d left in his bed was enough to have him smiling brightly.  
  
He finds the break room with ease, smiling at the cue behind the coffee pot. It always seemed to Harry that coffee was the lifeblood of the businessmen, so he took up drinking it to fit in. Businessmen are cool.  
  
“Oi, Styles!” Harry turns at the sound of his name. It’s one of the other interns walking toward him.  
  
“Oh, hey, Carrington.” He laughs as he uses his new mate’s last name as well.  
  
“Good morning.” He smiles brightly. “I think we’re getting our assigned mentors today, it’s about time, really.”  
  
“Yeah, I don’t think they were really organized with this whole internship thing.” There are only a few people in front of him.  
  
“Coffee is gross, how can you stand it?” Ian asks with a crinkled nose.  
  
“It’s not that bad. You’ve got to put a lot of sugar into it, though.” Harry moves forward without looking where he’s going, and collides with the man in front of him. Coffee splashes everywhere, including Harry’s shirt.  
  
“I am so sorry... Oh.” It was the same guy who’d kissed him in the copy room.  
  
“Nah, it’s okay, I wasn’t looking where I was going... Again. Same thing happened at the lift, yeah?” He flicks his hand a bit, flinging the burning hot coffee from his hand. Harry finds some napkins on the counter he’s next to. He wipes mindle  
  
“Yeah, with my papers...” He examines Harry’s arm where the skin turned red from the hot liquid. “You alright?”  
  
“I’m gonna head out,” Ian says from the side. Harry can tell he’s not feeling included in the conversation.  
  
“Yeah, I’m okay,” Harry replies, ignoring Ian’s dismissal of himself. “My shirt’s not, but I’ve got loads more just like this in my flat.”  
  
“That’s good, I suppose.”  
  
Harry frowns a bit, slightly put off by the distance in this man’s voice. They’d been so playful and friendly before the kiss. Which reminds him. “I never really knew your name.”  
  
“Oh, I’m Louis,” he says, extending a hand. Most of their interactions prior to this had been goofing off in passing. Harry had had some kind of personal mission to make him laugh.  
  
“Harry.” He takes his hand and shakes it.  “Are you a mentor, Louis?”  
  
“Yeah, unfortunately.” He sighs as he sets his nearly empty mug out. “Didn’t sign up for this, they just kind of shoved me into it. I’ve been paired up with some raging idiots, let me tell you. I don’t care how creative you are, art school obviously doesn’t teach much common sense.”  
  
This was the most Harry had ever heard him speak, and it’s insulting him. Regardless, he smiles and responds, “Yeah, we’re basically just taught the color wheel and they let us loose. We also discuss our feelings a lot.”  
  
“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize.” Louis’ eyes widen, and Harry can’t help but laugh at his concern.  
  
“No, I’m not offended.” Harry suddenly remembers Perrie’s suggestion to ignore him. He’s being too friendly. “Um, I’ve got to go.”  
  
Harry doesn’t wait for a reaction before he leaves the room without his coffee. He doesn’t make it far before he’s stopped by one of the mentors.  
  
“Hey, Harry.”  
  
“Oh, hi, Dan.” He looked behind him nervously, somewhat afraid that Louis had followed.  
  
“You’re getting your main mentor today...” He shifts through the papers in his hands, stopping at what looks like a list. “Let’s see, you’re going to be paired with Louis.”  
  
“Oh.” Harry blinks, unsure if he’d heard the right name. “Is there more than one Louis...or...”  
  
“That’s funny, Harry. He should be around here somewhere, you go ahead and tell him. Hmm, have you seen Ian Carrington anywhere?”  
  
“Yeah, he was in the break room last I saw.” Harry says helpfully, but his head is still spinning. How is he supposed to avoid him if he’s working with him? Time to be an adult about things, he supposes. With a sigh, he turns to look for the man he’d so rudely walked out on.  
  
He immediately catches sight of who he’s after. It looks as though Louis sees him too, because he basically dives behind the nearest desk. Harry raises a brow, and can’t help the muffled laugh that escapes into his hand. He walks over stealthily to the desk, and the man sitting there looks more terrified than Louis had.  
  
“Is he gone?” He can hear Louis whisper to him. Harry presses an index finger to his lips to the man he’d never met. He can see Louis grow impatient; there’s a little bit of his hair sticking up over the side of the desk. He turns and peeks over, right into Harry’s eyes.  
  
“Hey,” Harry says nonchalantly.  
  
Louis scrambles out from behind the desk and to his feet, straightening his shirt and clearing his throat. “I thought I saw a pencil... I can never get enough pencils.”  
  
“Right, you weren’t staring at me, then?”  
  
“What? No! Why would I...” Louis scratches avidly at his hair, laughing nervously.  
  
“That’s too bad. Anyway, it looks like I’m working with you.”  
  
“I know,” Louis says instantly. He drops his hand from his hair and realizes how that sounded. “I mean, what? No way. Wow, that’s really something.”  
  
It had been a while since Harry had been in a situation like this, but he knows he’s going to enjoy every second of it. “It is, isn’t it?”  
  
~~  
  
“Pass the popcorn,” Danielle says demandingly, reaching over Harry’s lap aimlessly. Perrie doesn’t look as she passes the bowl to her. Danielle munches mindlessly on the snack, the flickering screen keeping all of her attention.  
  
“She knows he loves her, why is she being like this?” Harry asks, a bit choked up from the emotional movie.  
  
“I hate films like this,” Perrie sniffs, reaching over Harry for a handful of popcorn. She drops a bit on his lap, but instead of complaining, he eats it.  
  
“She thinks he’s cheating on her with Sharpay...which is dumb, I mean, have you seen her?” Danielle scrutinizes.  
  
“Gabriella should trust Troy, though.” Harry sighs.  
  
“Don’t give him the necklace!” Perrie exclaims. She throws her handful of popcorn on the ground as Vanessa Hudgens gets into her mom’s minivan.  
  
“It’s okay, they have to get back together. There’s a third movie,” Harry states reasonably.  
  
“Disney really milked this franchise, didn’t they?” Danielle stuffs more popcorn in her mouth.  
  
“Ryan Evans is so gay,” Harry says.  
  
“Think Chad is too?”  
  
“Yeah, do you see this dance scene in the baseball thing?”  
  
“Baseball...” Perrie scoffs. “Americans.”  
  
“They switched clothes...” Danielle comments.  
  
“Oh my god,” Harry and Perrie say in unison.  
  
“Are they going to explain that?”  
  
“Doesn’t look like it...” Harry says, his hand finding the nearly empty popcorn bowl.  
  
Danielle and Perrie shift their positions, both of their heads finding each of Harry’s shoulders, the empty bowl falling forgotten on the ground.  
  
The credits roll, and they’re left feeling happier than when they came.  
  
“Okay, it wasn’t that bad,” Danielle admits.  
  
“I told you,” Perrie says, rolling her eyes. She gets up and places the DVD back in its case. “I believe this belongs to you?”  
  
“Thanks,” Harry says as he takes it from her. “Where’s Zayn?”  
  
“He’s out with Liam,” Perrie says. “They’re having a lads night out, or something.”  
  
Danielle sighs in content. “It’s great, really. Liam can be kind of suffocating sometimes.”  
  
“Yeah, Zayn’s not too much better. I’m glad they’ve got each other.”  
  
“That’s funny, I can hardly get enough of Charlie.” Harry stretches and blinks a few times, adjusting to that post movie feeling.  
  
“Wait a year or so,” Danielle assures him.  
  
“I don’t think so...”  
  
“Harry’s the overbearing boyfriend in his relationship, Dani,” Perrie clears up. Danielle makes a sound of understanding and pats Harry on the shoulder.  
  
“I am not!” Harry shrugs her hand away and they all laugh.  
  
“How’s your internship going, Harry?” This seems to be a part of every conversation lately, but Harry doesn’t mind.  
  
“Great, actually. It’s so fun and really hands on.”  
  
“Lucky, mine is so drabby. Like, I love what I’m doing and everything I’m around, but my mentor sucks. Have they stuck you with your main mentor, yet?”  
  
“Yeah... He’s alright, but now that he’s my mentor, ignoring him is out of the question.”  
  
“Oh, no.” Perrie’s eyes widen as she realizes what Harry is saying. “It isn’t...?”  
  
“What? I’m confused...” Danielle butts in.  
  
“This guy kissed Harry on his second day!” Perrie explains. “He sounds kind of like a freak to me.”  
  
“He’s not!” Harry says quickly. “I mean, he’s nice and really helpful and kind of quirky, but...he’s nice.”  
  
Danielle and Perrie both stare at him, and he realizes how deep he’s in.  
  
“Okay, so maybe I have a little crush on him.”  
  
“Harry...” Perrie says in warning.  
  
“I’m not going to act on it!”  
  
“I think it’s healthy to have someone at work that you fancy. It keeps things interesting,” Danielle suggests.  
  
“You work with your boyfriend,” Perrie replies, seeing through her words.  
  
“Yeah, but work is fun like that... Casually flirting and stuff.”  
  
“See? It’s just casual. Nothing bad can happen,” Harry says, rubbing his forearm.  
  
“Aren’t you afraid you’ll lead him on? No one likes that...” Perrie looks at him intently, and he knows what she’s referring to. Their second year of college consisted of Perrie chasing relentlessly after Harry before he finally came out to her.  
  
“I’ll be careful,” Harry assures her.  
  
“What’s next on the movie list?” Danielle asks, sifting through the pile of DVDs that had recently been in a neat stack. Harry sighs as he leans back on the couch, staring aimlessly at the ceiling. His thoughts were abuzz with guilt and slight butterfly-like feelings as Perrie and Danielle discussed titles.


	2. Parties and Alcohol

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry and Louis work on a project. Perrie meets a co-worker named Jade.

**H**

****

Harry starts going to a coffee shop before his internship starts, hoping beyond all hope this will do him good to at least shave off a little bit of Louis time a day. It’s a bit ridiculous, he’s aware, considering there’s free coffee he could have access to at the office. The coffee here isn’t cheap, but he doesn’t care. He enjoys the atmosphere. He enjoys the girl he met the first time he was there. She’s nice and always listens to what Harry has to say. She doesn’t have much to say in return, but she understands all of his hardships no matter how menial they can be.

****

He’s starting to carve out a morning routine, and this make him smile inexplicably. Even the London rain doesn’t seem to have an effect on him as he shakes it out of his jacket upon entering the ad agency. The floor plan was familiar now, and the faces more friendly toward him as he greets them by their first names.

****

“Hello, Mr. Mentor,” Harry greets as he twirls himself to Louis’ desk. “You’re looking dapper today.”

****

“I wear this tie all the time,” Louis replies with a furrowed brow. “Are you okay?”

****

“I’m fantastic,” he replies truthfully; his mood never seemed more bright.

****

“They’re putting something in that fancy coffee of yours,” Louis concludes with a swift gesture toward the cup Harry is holding.

****

“I think it’s creamer,” Harry says.

****

“You say creamer, I say acid.”

****

“Maybe...” Harry steps a bit closer and playfully ruffles Louis’ hair. He places a firm hand on Louis’ shoulder, and smirks at the slight twitch this elicits from the man. “Hey, what’s this?”

****

“Just something I’ve been assigned to... Well, we’ve been assigned to, I suppose.” Louis shrugs, allowing Harry to read over his shoulder.

****

“A dating service?”

****

“Yeah, we’ve got to make something aesthetically appealing to hopeful romantics. Only to lead them to a hopeless relationship.”

****

“Hopeless?” Harry asks.

****

“Yeah, relationships don’t make sense to me... Like, you’re stuck with a person, but for how long?”

****

“What if you find the right person?”

****

“Don’t know... I’ve never had good experiences. With anything, really. You’re a prime example of that.”

****

“Sorry...” Harry’s stomach twists up in a guilty knot.

****

“S’okay... So, any ideas?”

****

“What?”

****

“For the ad...” Louis waves the paper in front of him, laughing as though he’d lost his mind.

****

“I don’t know...” Harry leans against the desk, letting their arms brush. “Maybe something connecting two people... Like, flying between them?”

****

“That’s not a bad idea, really... What, though?”

****

“Maybe a bird, I’m not sure.” Harry is hardly paying attention, he’s trying to figure out more ways to get Louis’ attention on him. He mindlessly begins to play with Louis’ hair, pretending to focus on the project.

****

“I’m not sure about a bird, it seems kind of unoriginal.” Louis leans into Harry’s hand, but quickly flinches away.

****

Harry drops his hand and hops up to sit on Louis’ desk with a cheeky smile. “So, what should it be then?”

****

“I don’t know,” Louis says, rubbing his eyes with frustration. When he pulls his fingers away, his face is blotched red. “We could do a bridge. I mean, I guess that kind of works.”

****

“Yeah, but bridges don’t necessarily connect people. More like infrastructure. And bridges can be burned.”

****

A smirk almost instantly appears on Louis’ lips. “Getting a little deep now, are we?”

****

Harry shrugs, nudging him with his elbow. He walks around him, sneaking a peek at his bum. “It’s an advertisement for dating. We can get as deep as we want.”

****

“True, true.” Louis stares at the papers on his desk, seemingly deep in thought. Harry pretends to think, too, but he’s mostly trying not to laugh at the fabric designating along his torso. Did fish ties even exist? Apparently so. “You know what? I think we should sleep on this...” Louis suggests, nodding his head as he speaks. “We have plenty of time to decide. Not really, but you know.”

****

“Yeah, sounds good.” Harry drops himself from the desk, standing upright on his feet.

****

Louis brings forth another stack of papers. “Hold on there, tiger. We still have a lot of work to do.”

****

Harry wrinkles his nose as he finds his way back on top of the desk again. He raises an eyebrow with displeasure. “Tiger?”

****

**P**

****

“Decaf?” Perrie asks for clarification, trying not to groan.

****

“And make it fast,” says her mentor, using her shoulder to press the phone into her ear.

****

“Yes, ma’am.” Perrie does a small bow of inferiority before ducking out of the office, a sigh of relief escaping her mouth. Any time away from her boss wasn’t enough.

****

She hits the button on the lift and waits for it to arrive, tapping her foot and chewing a bit on her lipstick coated lip, hoping she didn’t leave any marks on her teeth. She enters the transport device the moment it dings, and immediately presses the appropriate button. Why her mentor had to have her office on an exclusive floor was beyond her, but she deals with it regardless.

****

She storms into the break room, her eyes glued to the coffee machine. Perrie ignores everyone in her path, putting the coffee ahead of other priorities. With a steady hand, she pours the hot liquid. It takes a moment before she realizes it’s not decaf.

****

“Shit.” She sighs, tossing the disposable cup into the bin.

****

“You alright, there?” A female voice asks.

****

“Yeah, fine,” she murmurs, too preoccupied to look at the stranger. Without breaking her gaze at the stacks of cups, she starts on her second attempt while continuing to remind herself that one day she wouldn’t have to deal with this shit.

****

“I’m surprised you’re still standing, as much as Mrs. Hunter runs her interns around.”

****

“Yeah, I—” Perrie looks up but is caught off guard by the pretty girl that’s been talking to her. “—eat a lot of fiber.”

****

“That must be the reason you’ve stuck around longer than any other intern I’ve seen.” She stirs some sugar into her tea. Her hair is a quirky mix of blue and purple, depending on how the light hits it.

****

“Really? I’ve only been here a week and a half.” Perrie focuses all of her attention on the girl, leaving the freshly poured coffee on the counter.

****

“Like I said, longest I’ve ever seen an intern stick around.” She smiles at Perrie. It’s a small smile, but it’s enough to have an affect on her. “I’m Jade, by the way.” She sticks out her hand and Perrie shakes it immediately.

****

“I’m—”

****

“Perrie, yeah, I know.” Jade winks at her before taking her hand back and sipping on her tea.

****

Perrie smiles slightly, feeling a bit flattered that she’d known. The question is how? “Well, I’ve gotta get back, but you’ll probably see me again here in a few minutes.” It’s no surprise that Mrs. Hunter wasn’t easily pleased.

****

“She always forgets what she wants, so she changes her mind and blames it on you.” Jade nods.

****

“Pretty much,” Perrie says, pressing the lid over the cup. “Anyway, it was nice to meet you, Jade.”

****

“Oh, definitely. Have a great day.” She smirks.

****

Perrie turns on her heel, prepared to leave when a thought comes across. “Wait,” she says, even though Jade hadn’t moved an inch to begin with. Perrie carefully struts back to her, and sort of smiles shyly as she asks, “Listen, my friend is having a party this weekend, and it’s not really formal or anything so it’s okay if I invite a few people. So...yeah.” She pauses, looking to the side of Jade’s face in order to avoid awkward eye contact. “It’d be great if you showed up.”

****

“Maybe... Hey, can I see your phone?” Jade asks suddenly, stepping closer.

****

“Erm, sure...” Perrie reaches in her pocket and hands it to her.

****

“You’ve got a passcode set...”

****

“Oh, sorry.” She enters the numbers, Zayn’s birthday, and hands it back to her.

****

“Alright, you’ve got my number...and,” Jade sticks her tongue out and snaps a picture of herself, “a new lockscreen.”

****

Perrie laughs at her screen before placing it back in her pocket. “Thanks... I’ll text you the address!”

****

She leaves the break room feeling a lot happier than she had when she’d entered. This happiness  is, of course, dashed when she returns to the top floor. Even as she’s carrying heavy equipment and heeding to every beck and call of her mentor, she can’t help but feel a bit lighter about everything.

****

**H**

****

Harry files through the stack of tickets Charlie had handed him. It wasn’t as if he didn’t like helping out his boyfriend, but he wasn’t opposed to stating his indifference. His task was menial, handing out tickets for the small entry fee. He watches as couple after couple walks in hand in hand. Most of them were same-sex couples, considering the venue. He looks around at the colourful decor. He’d gotten drunk here many times since moving to London when he was eighteen.

****

It’s easy making conversation with the people he comes in contact with, and all of them recognize him. The other band members had groupies, but Harry was the only one that had stuck around.

****

“Hey, baby,” he hears Charlie call out. He turns to find him squeezing through a few patrons. “It’s almost showtime.”

****

“Is it, really? I wasn’t paying attention to the time.”

****

“Come on, I want to be able to see you from the stage,” he says with a smile as he pulls him into the crowd by the hand.

****

“Good luck,” Harry wishes once Charlie has him in the right spot.

****

“Thanks,” Charlie smiles widely. “But all I need is you.”

****

Harry accepts his kiss gratefully and places each hand on the side of his face. Charlie wraps his arms around Harry’s waist as the kiss deepens.

****

“Love you,” Harry breathes once Charlie has to pull away.

****

“You, too.” He winks before kissing him again quickly and running toward the stage.

****

The band is setting up on the stage, the lead guitarist strumming idly on his guitar and making sure it’s in tune. Harry scratches at his beanie when someone bumps into him.

****

“Oh, sorry,” he says softly, glancing in the direction of the sudden disturbance.

****

“You should be, asshole.”

****

“Oh, it’s just you, I take it back.” Harry rolls his eyes at his mate.

****

“Shut up, you love me.” Niall nearly has to jump in order to hook his arm around Harry’s neck and begin messing up the hair beneath his beanie.

****

“Fuck you,” Harry says in complaint as he pulls away and tugs his beanie down angrily.

****

“Don’t you have the lead singer for that?”

****

“As a matter of fact...” Harry’s statement is cut short as someone begins to tap on the microphone.

****

“Hello, everybody, how are you this evening?” Charlie asks easily, his eyes scanning the crowd. There’s a large uproar in response that makes him smile the smile that won Harry’s heart. “I hope everyone’s night is going as swell as mine.” Charlie’s eyes meet Harry’s then and he winks. It’s almost enough for Harry to ignore the fact that he had said “swell.” Almost.

****

“That’s so cute,” Niall says while mockingly holding a hand to his chest.

****

“Shut up, we both know there’s nothing in your chest.”

****

“Oi! I’ll have you know I am a big romantic.” Niall puffs up his chest in defense.

****

“Right, I’ll believe that when I see it.”

****

“You never will.”

****

It’s a small statement, nothing that should be taken too heavily. But it sticks to Harry for some reason, and he looks over at his friend in concern. He doesn’t have time to question Niall’s meaning behind it before the room is filled with loud music.

****

Harry’s attention is immediately directed toward the stage. It’s easy and natural to get lost in his boyfriend’s music, but there’s something off about it this time. He crosses his arms and rubs his biceps out of distraction. He finds his eyes glued to the floor, and it boggles him slightly. He’d never been so distracted while Charlie was singing.

****

“Are you okay?” Niall has to shout into Harry’s ear. It’s a shock to Harry, and he jolts from the sudden voice.

****

“I’m fine,” Harry replies at the same frequency. “I think I just need some air.”

****

Niall nods and pats him on the shoulder as Harry makes his way through the jovial crowd. The task is a bit daunting, considering the mass amount compared to his single entity. The doorway almost glowed by the time he reached it; he was wanting it so badly.

****

The sudden cold air feels nice on Harry’s flushed cheeks, and he takes it in in sharp breaths. He can still hear the heavy beat from outside of the bar. He takes in the flickering neons above him and smiles at the familiarity. He’s not sure how to explain how he felt inside, but it scares him to ever think he was... bored. Bored at his boyfriend’s gig? Never. But he can’t bring himself to go back in, and the sudden vibration in his pocket offers a willing distraction.

****

He doesn’t recognize the number, but he answers anyway.

****

“Hello?”

****

It takes a second before the other line says anything, and Harry is pretty sure he hears the sound of a phone being dropped, followed by swears.

****

“Hello? Harry?”

****

“Yes?” He immediately recognizes the voice, but he doesn’t let on.

****

“It’s Louis.”

****

“Hey, Louis, this is Harry.” He knows he sounds dumb, but a goofy smile crosses his face.

****

“Yeah, I called you.”

****

“I know, why did you call, then? Wait, who is this?” Harry thinks his game is funny, and finds it hard to keep himself from laughing.

****

“It’s Louis,” the voice on the other end sounds at a loss.

****

“Oh, hey, Louis, this is Harry.” It’s then that Harry bursts into laughter and sputters “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” a few times, nearly doubling over on the sidewalk.

****

“I hate you.”

****

“Yeah, yeah, you love me.” Harry straightens himself and leans against the brick wall behind him, nodding awkwardly at the couple who stared at him on their way in.

****

“Whatever, I’m the one you love.”

****

“Oh?” Harry watches as his breath makes a cloud of steam in the air.

****

“Anyway, that’s not why I called. I was wondering if you wanted to meet for coffee.”

****

Harry’s face fell, and he was immediately glad Louis wasn’t there with him. He’s about to protest, and tell him exactly why he couldn’t, but Louis talks first.

****

“Not like a date or anything, just to discuss this new project.”

****

“Oh.” Harry can’t tell if he’s disappointed or not at Louis’ intentions. “Louis, it’s the weekend...” Harry relishes in the Friday evening, knowing the next few days were to be his to do whatever he felt like.

****

“Yeah, and that’s why we can’t brainstorm in the office.”

****

“Fine,” he sighs in complete defeat. “Meet me in the little shop around the corner from the agency?”

****

“Sounds good.” Harry thinks he can hear a hopeful ring in Louis’ voice, but selfishly ignores it. “Nine?”

****

“In the morning?” Harry groans loudly.

****

“Is that a problem?”

****

“No, sir, I’ll be there.” Harry has left his leaning position to begin pacing on the sidewalk.

****

“See you then... Who is this again?” Louis goes along with his joke, and it makes him smile stupidly.

****

“This is Louis,” Harry says jovially, mocking his voice.

****

“I don’t sound like that!” But Harry can hear him laughing on the other end. “See you tomorrow, Louis.”

****

“Kay, bye.” Harry hangs up and just sort of stares at the phone. “You’re a fucking idiot, Styles.”

****

He presses his forehead against the cold brick wall for a few minutes before walking back into the bar.

****

~~

****

“Just coffee, just business,” Harry repeats over and over as he makes his way to the coffee shop he’d began to frequent daily. He hadn’t expected to have to be here today, though. He had expected to sleep in, still entangled in his boyfriend’s arms. He smiles softly at the memory of the night before, and rubs absently at the lovebite that had been left on his neck. He looks at the glass doors of the coffee shop and takes in another breath. “Just coffee.”

****

Louis is nowhere to be seen. Of course he’s late. Harry looks down at his watch and notices it’s already five past. He decides to order anyway, and sits down where he usually sits.

****

“Harry? Didn’t expect you here on a Saturday.” The feminine voice calls from behind. Harry spins around in his spinny barstool and smiles warmly.

****

“Jade! Yeah, me neither. I’m meeting someone.”

****

“Ooh, a special someone?” Jade asks sweetly as she sits across from him.

****

“No!” Harry can tell by the look on Jade’s face that she doesn’t believe him. He’d only known her for about a week but she already seemed to know him more than he knew her. “You know I have a boyfriend.”

****

“So the someone you’re meeting isn’t him?” Jade takes a sip of her coffee.

****

“No, I’m meeting my mentor to discuss a project.”

****

“So a coffee date is the appropriate setting for that, then.”

****

“It’s not a date!” Harry knows he sounds defensive, but how else should he be? Jade simply raises her brows and looks into her coffee. “What about you? Any special someones?”

****

“Maybe... I don’t know, I kind of just met her.”

****

“Her?”

****

“Oh, shut up, like you couldn’t tell. Anyway, I kind of talked to her finally. She invited me to a party, but I can’t make it... I’m not sure how to tell her.” Jade looks distressed and she grips her coffee mug tightly.

****

“I’m sure she’ll understand.”

****

“I hope so... She’s really beautiful, and she does this thing with her eyebrows, and—wow, rude, don’t pretend like you’re sleeping when I’m talking about the love of my life.”

****

Harry laughs as he opens his eyes and dodges the hit from her direction. Her accent and sense of humour reminds him a lot of Perrie, and he wonders if he should introduce them together. The thought of inviting her to the party tonight crosses his mind, but then he remembers she’s busy.

****

“Harry?”

****

Harry looks up at the source of the voice, and can’t help the instant smile that appears on his face. Fucking idiot. “Hey, Louis.”

****

“It’s time for me to leave,” Jade interjects conveniently. She wiggles her eyebrows when Harry turns back to her. She leans in and kisses him on the mouth. “Bye, love.”

****

Harry just sort of stares as she stands and walks out of the coffee shop, and it looks as though Louis does the same.

****

“Coffee?” He suggests weakly.

****

“Yeah, let me go order some...”

****

Harry laughs to himself as Louis walks slowly toward the barista at the counter. Serves him right for being late. He stares awkwardly at the cup of fancy coffee that’s quickly growing cold as he waits for Louis to return. He moves his legs quickly, thanking the heavens that he hadn’t put Perrie’s on by mistake again.

****

“So...” Louis leads when he sits in Jade’s spot.

****

“So.” Harry smiles sweetly at Louis. He immediately feels bad, because he can tell what it’s done to him. He wants to apologise, but would that be more rude to let it be known that he’s noticed?

****

“The thing...” Louis is at a loss for words, and he moves his hands wildly, trying to get out what he wants to say.

****

“The project thing?”

****

“Yes, that.” Louis shoots at him with a finger gun, an awkward smile forming slowly. He looks back down at his coffee, and Harry notices the steam still rising from it.

****

“Something connecting them, why not something flying between them?” Harry suggests idly, not really sure what he’s saying.

****

“Yeah, that sounds good actually.” Louis is excited now, and it makes Harry sit up a bit straighter.

****

“Birds? Butterflies?” Harry says quickly, liking where it’s going.

****

“No, I don’t think it should be something living.”

****

“Yeah, I suppose... Maybe like a plane or something?” Harry takes a gulp of his now-cold coffee.

****

“Hmm...” Harry can see Louis considering it.

****

“I don’t know, I just...”

****

“Paper planes...” Louis mutters quietly, but it’s just enough for Harry to hear. Harry’s hand flies up to his chest, wondering if his paper plane pendant had fallen out from behind his shirt, but it was still hidden. He watches as Louis looks down at his mug and his fingers trail around the rim.

****

“Louis?” Harry asks, his eyes widening and squinting in disbelief at the same time.

****

“Yeah?” Louis looks at him strangely.

****

“No, Louis?”

****

“Yes, I’m Louis. Is this like that game on the phone?” Louis arches his brow, but the amusement hasn’t left his face.

****

“No, I mean... Louis?”

****

“That’s my name, Harry, I—” he stops short. “Harry?”

****

Harry knows it’s impossible. He knows there’s no fucking way this was the same Louis he’d known all those years ago. There’s no way this man before him was the same little boy he’d been so fond over in his childhood.

****

“Louis.”

****

“Harry.”

****

“Louis?” Harry just looks at him, his coffee beyond forgotten.

****

They both just sit there for a long moment, looking at each other, unsure of what to do next. Did they really have to do anything now? Harry was pretty content with the idea of staring at Louis like this for the rest of his life.

****

“Harry, I—”

****

“Oh my god, Louis, you gave me my first hand job.” Harry’s hand finds his mouth to catch the laughter that comes out now.

****

“Harry!” Louis’ ears get red and he looks around quickly, unsure if anyone has heard him. “That wasn’t a hand job, I didn’t know what I was doing!”

****

“Seemed a lot like one.”

****

“No, I was just showing you...” Louis stops in his tracks, and suddenly seems to find his coffee interesting again.

****

“This is...really happening?”

****

“Seems so.”

****

Harry raises his eyebrows and lets out a big breath of air. Louis. His Louis. All thoughts of work and projects were shoved to the side. “You didn’t write or visit,” he said in a small voice. When he glanced up, he could see Louis’ crumpled expression.

****

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think you still cared about me.”

****

“Louis, you were my co-pilot.”

****

Another silence settles over them at the term Harry used. Harry remains incredibly still, because he feels as though if he moves he’ll probably start shaking. Why is this hard? It shouldn’t be hard. And yet Harry finds it hard to look at Louis again.

****

“I’m sorry.”

****

“It’s okay, it’s not like I felt abandoned or anything.” Lies.

****

“I was ten, I didn’t have a choice.”

****

“I said it’s fine.” More lies. “Hey, remember Perrie?”

****

“Yes.” Louis’ voice is excited now, and filled with old memories.

****

“We’re still friends. We’re going to a party tonight... Do you have any plans?”

****

“Well, I did have plans with a mate, but he blew me off. So, yeah, I guess I’m free. Does she still go on and on about Harry Potter?”

****

“Sometimes, but right now it’s the Hunger Games.”

****

“Of course. She’s so mainstream.” He speaks as if he still knows her, which itches at Harry slightly.

****

“Yeah. Um, I need to get back to my flat, I’ve got someone waiting.” Harry stands before Louis can really say anything. “Erm, I’ll text you the address to the party tonight. Perrie will be excited to see you.”

****

He doesn’t make eye contact with him before he leaves. He knows he’s being childish, but he suddenly feels like the frightened and sad eight-year-old watching Louis’ car drive away.

****

**P**

****

“Louis?” Perrie nearly drops her curling iron. “You’re fucking kidding me?”

****

“No, I swear to god it’s him,” Harry’s voice floats through the speakerphone from Perrie’s bathroom counter.

****

“And you invited him?” she asks excitedly, smiling widely into the mirror.

****

“Perrie, I’m pretty sure he’s gay.” Harry’s voice sounds a bit too disinterested to her.

****

“Yeah, and I’m taken.” She wraps some more of her blonde hair onto the hot rod in her hand. “Are you okay? I’d figure you would be more excited.”

****

“I am excited, but... I don’t know.”

****

“Are you having abandonment issues?” She examines her intricate curls in the mirror and sighs in satisfaction before she begins digging for her make up.

****

“No...”

****

“Yes you are.” She pulls out her eyeliner and begins coating the rims of her eyelids gratuitously.

****

“And you’re probably putting on way too much eyeliner.”

****

“I’m going to hang up on you,” she miffs toward the inanimate phone.

****

“Fine, fine, I don’t know. Did I ever tell you about what happened, though?”

****

“Was your little eight-year-old self in love with him? That’s so cute.” Perrie tries to sound supportive, but her tone falls as she concentrates on the application of foundation.

****

“Shut up, I didn’t know what it was. But he touched me...”

****

“What?!” Perrie drops her application brush as she screeched. “Why didn’t you tell me that?”

****

“No, it wasn’t a huge deal, it was just the first time, I don’t know. And yeah, I was little. I wanted to kiss him, but I thought it was wrong. He was two years older than me and so cool, and...”

****

Perrie frowns at the sad voice on the phone. “Well, isn’t this your chance to live what you dreamed of as a kid? I don’t know, fate or something?”

****

“I can’t do that. Charlie.”

****

“Oh,” Perrie frowns. She feels bad for forgetting completely about Harry’s year long boyfriend. She blames it on the shock of finding out about Louis. “Okay, so don’t do that. Just be his friend again.”

****

“Can I do that?”

****

“I don’t think there’s a law against friendship,” she says sarcastically. Her phone buzzes and indicates a message has been received. She smiles at her background: the silly face that Jade had pulled for her camera. It’s then that she notices the message is from the subject of her thoughts.

****

Can’t make the party tonight, soz! See you monday?

****

There’s a plethora of hearts next to the message, but she still frowns and makes a noise of disappointment.

****

“You okay there, Per?”

****

“Yeah, I’m alright. But like I was saying, just be friends again. Shouldn’t be hard.” She begins to apply her lipstick and nearly gets it everywhere when there’s a sudden loud banging at her door.

****

“Perrie, are you done yet?” Zayn asks through the door impatiently. “I’ve really got to pee.”

****

“Ugh, men,” she mumbles into her phone.

****

“I feel ya,” Harry replies through the speaker.

****

“See you in a bit, love,” she says, signaling the end of their phone conversation.

****

“Kisses.”

****

Perrie hangs up her phone and quickly finishes her makeup before opening the door to a much relieved boyfriend.

****

“Sorry.”

****

“It’s okay,” Zayn replies all but gently before making his way in. He doesn’t even wait for her to leave before he unzips and sighs in relief.

****

“Such a gentlemen,” she laughs as she walks into their bedroom. She sits down on the edge of the bed to pull on the clogs she had set out for her outfit.

****

She hears the sink in the bathroom turn on as Zayn washes his hands, but her attention is focused on her footwear. Maybe she should change them; do they really go with this outfit? She’s caught entirely off guard when there’s a sudden body on top of her.

****

“Zayn, no, I just did my makeup!” She laughs at his mouth that’s pressed to her neck. She’s always been ticklish there.

****

“You can redo it, and I can wash my face,” he reasons as his lips make contact with hers. Too late now, anyway, so she joins in the kiss. Her fingers get lost in Zayn’s hair, and she’s pretty sure her symmetrical curls are getting smashed against the duvet. She lets her knee trail up Zayn’s thigh, causing her skirt to fall down, and for bare skin to be available for Zayn’s wandering hand.

****

“Eherm.” There’s a sudden knock at the door and Zayn jumps away from Perrie. Perrie doesn’t have anywhere to jump, to be fair.

****

“You told us to pick you up at your flat,” Liam explains, his face a bright shade of red as Perrie sits up and pulls her skirt down. “No one was answering, and the door was unlocked, so...”

****

“Sorry, I...” Zayn looks down at the floor.

****

“Oi, what’s the hold up?” Danielle asks as she peeks around Liam. “Girl, you need to re-apply ASAP.”

****

Perrie is suddenly extremely self conscious as she runs toward the bathroom. She can hardly hear the others in the other room, but she makes out Danielle saying “remember when we were young and in love like that?”

****

“Okay, I’m ready, I’m ready,” Perrie announces when she walks out of the bathroom. She latches onto Danielle’s arm and they lead the group out of the flat.

****

~~

****

Perrie is immediately lost in the excitement of the music and dancing going on in Leigh and Jesy’s flat. A plastic cup is handed to her almost the moment she walks in, and she drinks it gratefully. She finds Harry quickly and runs to him, pulling him into a hug. It’s better to find him while she’s still sober if at all.

****

“This is Louis,” Harry says loudly over the pounding music.

****

“Louis?!” Perrie immediately hugs him tightly. “It’s been so long!”

****

“You look exactly the same,” Louis says.

****

“Not exactly?” Perrie juts out her bottom lip in defense.

****

“Okay, just bigger.” Louis ruffles her hair and she closes her eyes in content and hums in approval.

****

“Where’s Charlie?” She asks Harry.

****

“I don’t know, he said he was coming.”

****

“Who’s Charlie?” Louis asks. Perrie punches Harry in the stomach.

****

“Harry’s boyfriend.”

****

“Oh.”

****

Perrie bites her lip as she watches the exchange go down. She’s seriously going to have a talking to with Harry later.

****

“Speaking of which, have you met Perrie’s boyfriend? Zayn!” Harry waves the subject over. Zayn looks a bit disgruntled to be torn from his conversation with Liam, but he comes to them nonetheless. His arm instantly loops around Perrie’s waist, and she smiles up at him.

****

“Who’s this, then?”

****

“I’m Louis.”

****

“He’s a childhood friend,” Perrie explains, leaning into Zayn possessively.

****

“Nice to meet you, I’m Zayn.”

****

“He’s my ball and chain,” Perrie jokes, playfully elbowing him in the stomach. She takes a large gulp from her cup and winces. She practically purrs at the hand that strokes at her hair. She turns into him and nuzzles into his chest. “Love you,” she coos.

****

It seems like it was only seconds she was like that, but when she looks up Harry and Louis are gone.

****

“I’m going back to talk to Liam, alright, love?”

****

“Okay, I’m sure Leigh is around somewhere.” She pats his shoulder softly before leaving him to find some of her friends.

****

It’s not long before she hears Jesy’s extremely loud laughter and Scottish impression. Danielle and Leigh-Anne are there too, laughing at all of Jesy’s accent. Perrie’s smile widens as she joins her girls.

****

“Is El coming?” Leigh asks suddenly, scanning around the room for their thin friend.

****

“Nah, I think she’s working a late shift.”

****

“Poor thing,” Perrie puts in.

****

“She’s got to pay for all that Topshop somehow,” Danielle comments.

****

“Thought she had a nice and rich beau for that,” Leigh says with lifted brows. “Maybe that’s what she means by ‘late shift.’” She stirs the liquid in her cup with a straw and stares into it judgmentally.

****

“No, she wouldn’t!” Jesy sounds appalled.

****

“Wouldn’t put it past her,” Perrie admits. She does have expensive taste in clothing.

****

She knows she shouldn’t put into the gossip, but she can never resist. She also knows they probably talk about her when she’s not here, but she doesn’t really care. Girls just worked that way. It took her a long time to figure that out.

****

“So, Danielle, do you think Liam is going to ask you the big question soon?” Leigh nudged her in the side. Danielle smiled and giggled brightly.

****

“I don’t know, he hasn’t really hinted. But I’m hoping soon...” She glances down into her drink before taking a large sip through her straw.

****

“What question?” Perrie feels a bit dumb asking.

****

“Will you marry me?” Jesy asks dramatically, taking Leigh-Anne by the hand.

****

“Oh, Jesy, I thought you’d never ask,” she replies a bit breathlessly, her voice taking on the persona of a southern belle.  

****

“Oh. That question.” Perrie plays with the rim of her cup.

****

“What about you, Per? You’ve been with Zayn for two and a half years now? Think he’s going to ask you anytime soon?”

****

“I don’t know, I haven’t really thought about it.” Does she even want to think about it? She takes a few more drinks, large ones, and finds herself feeling incredibly dancey. She grabs Danielle by the hand and pulls her out into the floor.

****

“Oh,” Danielle says in surprise. She’s a bit tipsy herself, so she doesn’t say no to the close vicinity Perrie begins to dance against her.

****

The music gains intensity, and so does Perrie, the alcohol running freely through her veins. The air feels heavy, and her neck doesn’t seem like enough support of her head. Her legs feel like noodles, so she laughs hysterically at the feeling.

****

She doesn’t know how her body got pressed so close against Danielle’s, and she can’t explain the feeling it gives her. There’s a feeling in the pit of her stomach, like a sudden storm has struck an ocean and it was all in her tummy. She’s pretty sure she’s felt this once before, but not this intense.

****

It takes her a second before she pulls herself away from the girl, realizing how much this had turned her on. She doesn’t say anything as she walks away, rubbing her forehead in slight embarrassment. Her eyes were drooping significantly. How long have they been here? She needs to find a restroom. She catches Zayn and Liam in the corner of her eye. They’re laughing hysterically about something, and Zayn is falling into Liam’s chest. She smiles, thinking how lucky she was that one of her best friends’ boyfriends got on so well with hers.

****

She finds a hallway and kind of falls into it, giggling up a storm. She thinks she can hear a girl crying, but there’s no one to be seen. Where is the bathroom here again? She’s been to Leigh and Jesy’s flat countless of times, why is this so hard?

****

“Hmm, this one...” She opens up a closet and frowns. The small space looks comfortable, and she almost sucumbs to the idea of falling into it and falling asleep.

****

She soldiers on down the hall, her mind hazy and the walls seem to be closer every time she steps, so she finds herself walking into it often. The next door looks promising. Perhaps she’ll find a toilet in there.

****

“Oh,” she breathes as the door opens to two figures plastered together, kissing passionately. She laughs when she recognizes them. “Harry, you should not...do that.”

****

She walks away from the pair, regardless. She’s still laughing as she leaves Louis and Harry behind her. Their clothes were still on, so it’s not the end of the world.

****

“Perrie?” A familiar voice asks. She clings to it, her eyes fluttering closed.

****

“Zaynie... Marry me,” she murmurs incoherently. She suddenly feels the comfortable feeling of a couch beneath her.

****

It feels like only moments before she can’t remember anything else.

****

**H**

****

Harry lies still, staring at the ceiling. The ceiling is staring at him, judging his actions harshly.

****

“Shut up, it was an accident,” he scowls at the inconsiderate part of the flat. What’s the point of ceilings? Sure, they keep out the constant London rain, but Harry wants to see the sky.

****

“What?” a sleepy voice from beside him asks.

****

“Nothing...” Harry shifts his attention to the boy next to him. “Where were you last night?”

****

“Had to work late,” Charlie explains with a heavy sigh. “Could’ve really used some unwinding. Did you have fun?”

****

“Yeah...” Oh, god, Charlie was working and Harry was being a slut. It was just a kiss, nothing huge, but it was still a kiss.

****

“Speaking of unwinding...” Charlie’s finger traces Harry’s collarbone and flicks a seductive glance up at him.

****

Harry smiles down at him. His hair is mussy from sleeping and he hasn’t put his glasses on yet. It strikes him as stunning, but when Charlie moves in for a kiss Harry pulls away.

****

“Sorry, I’ve got to shower and I’ve got plans with Perrie.” Harry quickly removes himself from their bed, and refuses to make eye contact with the boy he betrayed. He hasn’t even told him about the kiss in the copy room. He hasn’t even told him about how he knew Louis as a kid.

****

The shower is nice for clearing his head, and he revels in it, letting the warm water cascade over his back and soak his hair. He hopes Perrie isn’t actually busy today, because in all honesty he hadn’t made any plans at all with her.

****

He spends the rest of the morning avoiding Charlie, which is incredibly difficult considering they’re the only two in the flat. He decides to leave after he’s dressed, giving Charlie a quick peck on the cheek and rushing out.

****

“Hey, Perrie?” He asks when she answers.

****

“At your service... Kind of.” She sounds awful, in all honesty.

****

“Can we make lunch plans? Maybe plans for tea as well? I don’t... I don’t want to go home.” Harry rides the lift downward and finds himself alone on the crowded London streets.

****

“Is everything alright?” She sounds instantly alarmed. “Is it about that thing I saw?”

****

“Yes, everything’s fine. And, I don’t know, maybe.”

****

“Let me get dressed. We’ll meet at the usual cafe.”

****

“Bless.”

****

He could take public transport to get to his destination, but walking sounds more relaxing, so he opts for that. The air has a slight mist to it, and it clings to Harry’s face refreshingly. His mind wanders into the night before. Not the mistake of a kiss, but the other small things. He’s had more fun than he had in a long time. There was the beautiful plot twist of Niall being Louis’ best mate. Implausible, but still a fact.

****

Harry laughs into the air when he thinks of the awkward conversation between Niall and Louis. (“So this is what you ditched me for?” “Well, I mean... Yeah.”)

****

It’s quite a few blocks before Harry reaches his destination, and when he arrives he’s not surprised Perrie isn’t there yet. That girl takes forever to get ready.

****

He’s smiling as he taps on the table impatiently. He’s not sure why he’s smiling, and he feels guilty for it, but he can’t help himself. There’s a kind of serene silence that falls over him as the waitress brings him his coffee and he watches the sugar dissolve in the dark liquid. He’s really getting addicted to this stuff, but it’s kind of nice to have a new normal in his life.

****

“Hey, sorry, did you wait long?” Perrie asks in a rush. He looks up to see her in a sort of frenzy, but her hair looks nice.

****

“Rough night?” Harry jokes.

****

“Oh, you were there.” Perrie hooks her handbag on the side of the chair and sits down across from him. “Speaking of which...”

****

“Yeah?” Harry asks when he winces from the sudden burning sensation on his tongue. “Shit, that’s hot.”

****

“Coffee usually is.” Perrie laughs at him as she plays with her hands on the table. “Last night... I know I was drunk, but what I saw...”

****

“Okay, so I kind of made out with Louis.”

****

“Harry...” Perrie’s voice is full of judgment.

****

“Look, can we just not talk about it? I know it was a mistake, so let’s just ignore it.”

****

“You mean that’s not why I’m here?” Perrie furrows her brow in confusion. “You just legitimately wanted to spend time with me?”

****

“Yeah, is that so shocking?”

****

“Yes,” she says simply. “Every time you call on me it’s because there’s something big going on in your life.”

****

“Aw, Pez, you know I think more of you than that.” Harry pats her hand from across the table.

****

“I was beginning to wonder.” She holds up the menu now to read through the selection.

****

Harry feels a bit guilty about the whole situation. He doesn’t want Perrie to know he’s just using her to get away from Charlie. Because looking at Charlie only deepens his guilt immensely.

****

“Hmm, I’m thinking just a salad maybe... Oh, or maybe a sandwich.”

****

“Get whatever you want. On me.”

****

“Oh, you’re treating me too? Who are you and what have you done with Harry Styles?”

****

“A group of really advanced scientists replaced me with a robot.”

****

“Oh, it’s like Star Wars.”

****

“No, not like Star Wars at all, really.” Harry smiles into his coffee as Perrie frowns.

****

“Huh. I never really got into those movies,” she admits absently. “I was always into books.”

****

“Oh, trust me, I’m aware.”

****

“Was I really that precocious as a child?” Perrie almost slams her menu on the table.

****

“Erm, just a bit.”

****

“Can we go shopping after this? I need to update my wardrobe for Mrs. Hunter.”

****

“She’s making you get new clothes?” Harry asks in shock. This lady seems really into her work.

****

He watches Perrie’s mouth move avidly as she nags on her mentor, but only a few words are reaching him. Having Perrie around is a good distraction to what he should be feeling but wasn’t. He hates not feeling guilty about the kiss. In fact, he’s kind of guilty about not guilty. Which should be the same thing, right? But it’s different.

****

He can’t wait for the morning to come so that he can talk to Louis again. He’s missed him so much.

 


	3. Questions and Denial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry continues flirting with Louis, despite the ramifications it can cause, Perrie gets closer to Jade, and Zayn has something to ask Perrie.

**H**

****

“Pass me a pencil, please,” Harry says, holding out his hand. A pencil appears in his hand as if by magic, but he knows it’s attached to Louis’ hand. And Louis’ hand is attached to Louis’ arm. And Louis’ arm is attached to Louis.

****

Harry sketches simply on the large plan sheet in front of him, pretending to concentrate on it and solely it. He pretends to ignore how close Louis feels behind him, how he can feel the heat radiating from his body. How he has his eyes, his nose, his lips, his jawline, all in his memory and feels like drawing them every second.

****

Instead of Louis’ face, he sketches a paper plane. It’s a simple structure, but it works for what they need it for.

****

“Okay, yeah, but maybe, I don’t know...” Louis’ voice practically hovers over Harry’s head, and he’s caught off guard by the sudden arm that shoots over his shoulder to point at the paper. “We should write ‘fate’ right here.”

****

“Fate...” Harry mumbles the word out, liking the way it sounds. Such a simple word but so much meaning. Harry’s chair is on wheels, so he pushes at the desk in front of him forcefully and laughs at the grunt it elicits from Louis.

****

“Dick,” Louis seethes as he falls backwards. Harry spins the chair around and shoots him a winning smile, teeth and all. “I’m your boss, you know.”

****

“Oh, no, are you going to fire me?” Harry asks humorlessly, feigning a look of fear.

****

“No, I can’t do that... But you need a recommendation from me if you want an actual job here by the time this whole internship thing is over.” Louis huffs and crosses his arms.

****

“Aw, you’d recommend me?” Harry says, touched by the suggestion.

****

“Not if you keep slamming into me.”

****

“I thought that’s what you wanted.” Harry smirks at the way Louis’ expression falters before he spins back toward his sketch. Louis is silent for the next several moments as an idea strikes Harry. He grabs a blank sheet of paper and begins folding quickly, surprised at how well he remembers the technique. Kind of like riding a bike, he supposes.

****

He turns the chair around again and sends the paper plane soaring toward Louis, hitting him straight in the chest. He laughs as he watches it fall to the ground and Harry smiles in triumph.

****

“Hmm, let’s see if I can remember...” Louis says as he walks back toward the desk. He grabs a sheet of paper and begins folding it confidently, but the more he tries to create the figure, the more his face falls, looking less excited. “Um.” He bites down his bottom lip, continuing to fumble with the paper.

****

“I’ll help,” Harry offers.

****

“No! I got this,” Louis insists, but Harry’s already taken it from him. He huffs a breath and crosses his arms, like a little child, and Harry smiles because it’s like nothing has changed at all.

****

“Look, Lou.” Harry turns his head to look at him, gesturing at the paper in his hand. “This is how it’s done. You just...fold it like this.” He demonstrated, folding each flap down until he formed the perfect plane, the entire process taking him mere seconds to complete. “It’s easy,” he says just to spite him.

****

A light shade of pink covers the man’s cheeks as he pulls out another sheet of paper from his desk, this time eyeing the stack with determination. He shakes his head as he follows through Harry’s steps. “This used to be so much easier. When did things become so difficult?”

****

Though Louis’ only speaking on these little terms, it takes on a deeper meaning for Harry, bringing him to think beyond the simple words and sending him back to his childhood. His face falls a little with the realisation; things really had seemed easier back then.

****

Clearing his throat, he nods his head. Louis holds out the miniature plane to Harry’s face as if to say “Ta-da!” and Harry can’t hold back a smile. “It’s alright,” he says, shrugging. “Not as great as mine, but it’ll do.”

****

Louis lifts his arm and elbows Harry, causing him to laugh with surprise.

****

“That wasn’t very nice!”

****

“I am your boss,” Louis points out once more, as if that’s his excuse for everything.

****

“Right, Mr. Tomlinson.” Harry raises an eyebrow suggestively. Biting down his lip, he tilts his head to the side and attempts to look as innocent as possible. “Are you going to punish me then?”

****

Louis plays along, crossing his arms and straightening his expression. “You have been a very naughty boy.”

****

“I’m sorry... I can change, sir,” Harry begs, trying not to giggle at the very conversation. “I’ll be a good boy for you.”

****

Louis shakes his head, diverting his gaze to the ceiling. Harry then sees a figure standing behind him, a lady with light brown hair, looking startled and unbelievably confused. He bites his tongue to keep from bursting into laughter. “No, no. It’s too late for that, Styles. On your knees now.”

****

Finally, she clears her throat. “Um, hi.”

****

“Hello,” she replies weakly before suddenly becoming very interested in something far away from the cubicle they occupied.

****

“Whoa, casanova, you always reel in the ladies like that?” Harry jokes with an arched brow. He goes back to folding another plane.

****

“Girls,” Louis scoffs. He pulls up a rolly chair of his own and rolls closer to Harry.

****

“Yes, girls,” Harry mocks his tone. He sends another paper plane soaring, and it flies over the wall surrounding their small workspace. “Oops.”

****

“I don’t like girls,” Louis admits, making a less than admirable model of his own.  It barely flies a few feet, landing on the ground beside the trash can.

****

“You certainly liked Gemma,” Harry jokes nostalgically.

****

“Yeah, what’s she doing these days? I ‘ought to give her a ring.”

****

“Married.”

****

“My last chance of being straight sent down the garbage.” Louis sighs dramatically.

****

“Oh, please, you showed the signs at age ten!” Harry folds another plane, smiling down at the memories.

****

“Yeah, giving handjobs is definitely a sign.” Louis scoffs.

****

“I was so defenseless,” Harry responds, feigning an innocent tone.

****

“Whatever, you enjoyed it.”

****

“Pedophile,” he says accusingly as he sends another plane at his chest, forgetting that they were in public and having this conversation.

****

“Jesus, Tomlinson, what’s with all of these bleeding paper planes?” The supervisor asks as he passes by.

****

“Research,” Louis explains, refraining from laughing.

****

“Experimentation,” Harry replies at about the same time, waving his eyebrows suggestively. “I mean, I...”

****

“Yes, that’s what it is,” Louis agrees without sparing a moment’s hesitation, throwing another paper plane which ends up hitting the supervisor on the bum and then falling to the floor, both of them struggling to swallow their laughs.

****

“Getting a lot done, I see,” he says, taking one quick glance at the folded paper, and then on his way.

****

Harry and Louis immediately let their laughter escape once the man is most likely out of earshot.

****

~~

****

“Wow, you seem happy,” Charlie says as he takes a bite of his salad.

****

“I’m always happy.” Harry doesn’t bother swallowing before he speaks, manners be damned. He sighs inwardly, thinking about how boring everything seems around the flat. He’s lived with Charlie for more than a few months and has never felt bored before.

****

“Something’s different though...” Charlie tilts his head as he examines Harry. “I like it.”

****

“Thanks, I suppose...” Harry flips his food around on his plate, his appetite steadily decreasing. He pushes his plate away after a few seconds.

****

Charlie ruffles Harry’s hair as he walks past him with his empty plate. “You done?”

****

“Yeah...” Harry watches blankly as Charlie takes the plate from him and walks to the sink. “Want me to do the dishes?”

****

“No, I’ve got it.”

****

“Okay,” Harry sighs as he sits idly, drumming a beat on the counter and tilting his chair back. His feet are restless, though, so he stands and begins to pace around the flat.

****

He sits at his desk and taps a pencil rapidly, unsure of what to draw. It’s unsettling how annoyed he was at being stuck in his flat. He hears the water from the tap go off, but pays no mind to it as he continues to stare at the blank paper in front of him.

****

He’s caught off guard when Charlie’s arms spring out from behind him and wrap him up in a hug. He almost pushes him away. He wants to, but he refrains. Instead he settles back into Charlie’s warm chest, listening to the even beat of his heart.

****

Charlie comes around Harry and kisses him softly on the forehead, his mouth kissing its way down to Harry’s lips and then to his jaw. Harry tries to get into it, he tries to return Charlie’s passion. It all seems to come up short on his end, though, and before he knows it his boyfriend has made his way down to Harry’s zipper.

****

He strokes Charlie’s hair admirably, letting him know he was appreciative of what was about to happen. His eyes dart to the desk when his phone begins to ring.

****

“Char, hang on a sec...” Harry grabs his phone. “Hello?”

****

“Hiya, Harry! It’s Louis, and before you ask again... It’s still Louis.”

****

Harry’s face brightens considerably until he realizes that Charlie isn’t stopping. He unzips his pants and Harry stares at a wall as his boyfriend goes down on him.

****

“Hello?” Louis asks from the other end.

****

“Oh, erm, sorry. Why’d you call?” Harry keeps his breaths short and his free hand is grasping onto Charlie’s red hair that he definitely doesn’t imagine as brown.

****

“Good to hear your voice too.” Louis’ tone is drenched in sarcasm. If only he knew how much Harry doesn’t want to hear his voice right now.

****

“Yeah, definitely... So?” It takes a lot to keep his composure as Charlie adds a hand into the job he was doing. Harry keeps a steady gaze on the wall, but he can feel his hand moving up and down.

****

“We’ve been goofing off a lot in the office, and I think we need to discuss this project more.”

****

“Y-yeah, definitely.” Harry is speaking faster than he ever has.

****

“Think you could come by the office later and put in some extra hours fucking me into the desk?”

****

“What?” Harry shouts loudly and his body jolts suddenly.

****

“I said ‘do you want to come by the office later and put in some extra hours working on this project?’”

****

“Oh.” Harry tries to make it sound like he’s comprehended, but the vowel comes out a bit longer and breathier than expected. His mind is playing tricks on him, now. He can’t help the way Louis’ voice has him so captivated, and—shit. His toes curl and his right leg lifts slightly. “Yes, yeah, I’ll c-come by.”

****

“Cool...”

****

Harry hopes beyond anything that Louis isn’t fishing for more conversation topics. He doesn’t know how long he can keep this going. Louis’ mouth is moving up and down him—Charlie’s mouth, Harry definitely meant Charlie’s mouth. Harry is dangerously close to the edge, and he doesn’t want it to be when Louis is still on the phone. Harry’s mind wanders to the party from the previous weekend. It focuses in on Louis’ lips, specifically pressed to his.

****

“Shit, I’ve gotta go, bye!” Harry hangs up abruptly, praying to whatever god was necessary that Louis hadn’t heard the moan he couldn’t keep down.

****

“That was my boss, you dick!” Harry scolds Charlie as he watches him wipe off his face with his hand, a small mischievous smile painted on him.  

****

“Did you tell him I said hi?” Charlie asks as he stands and leans in to kiss Harry.

****

Harry is definitely imagining Charlie kissing him, not Louis. That would be stupid.

********  
  


**P**

****

Perrie pokes mindlessly at her salad, almost wishing her forty minute break was over. At least when her mentor was constantly barking out orders, someone was talking to her. Her mouth was set in a frown as she stared down at the less than appetizing lunch.

****

“Hello!”

****

She’s startled by the sudden voice and presence next to her. Jade smiles winningly at her before biting into the apple she’s holding. Her hair is a different color than from when she first met her.

****

“Oh! Your hair!”

****

“Do you like it?” Jade’s voice almost sounds self-conscious.

****

“It’s beautiful!” Perrie assures her, marveling at the red hair she was now sporting. “I wish I could pull something like that off, I’ve always stuck to blonde.”

****

“I could do your hair for you,” Jade offers as she grabs a sandwich from her bag.

****

“Hmm, dunno, let me think on that.” Perrie prods at her salad some more.

****

“Ew, salad.”

****

Perrie looks up from her salad again to see Jade scrunching her nose and she laughs. “Something wrong with my lunch?”

****

“Not if you’re a rabbit.”

****

“I would look adorable in bunny ears,” Perrie challenges.

****

“I wouldn’t doubt it,” Jade laughs into the half of her sandwich she was holding.

****

“My inner rabbit doesn’t seem to be speaking to me today, it seems.” She pushes her salad away with a dramatic sigh before opening her water bottle and taking a drink.

****

“Fancy half a turkey sandwich?” Jade asks as she holds it out to her.

****

“Oh, no, I—”

****

“I insist.”

****

“Well, it does look tasty.” Perrie neglects to inform Jade that she’s a vegetarian and takes the sandwich anyway. She takes a small bite, but decides to hell with it and takes a larger one. She hadn’t had turkey in a very long time.

****

“Sorry I wasn’t able to make it to the party, I really wanted to go.”

****

“Oh, that’s alright,” Perrie says, hardly pausing between bites. “I got so pissed, I doubt I would have made a very good first impression.”

****

“That actually sounds hilarious, what happened?”

****

“I ended up totally grinding against my friend Danielle. Good thing you weren’t there, that could have been you!”

****

“Glad I skipped it, then.”

****

Perrie’s sandwich is gone before she realises, and she pats her stomach approvingly. She briefly wonders why she’d even become a vegetarian in the first place. Her phone buzzes next to her elbow and she glances at it to see a text from Zayn.

****

“I’m still your lockscreen?” Jade asks happily.

****

“Yeah... It makes me smile.” Perrie smiles down at the table before reaching for her phone to read the message. “Looks like I’m in for a romantic evening.”

****

“Sounds pleasant. I’ll be alone with my cat watching re-runs of Downton Abbey.”

****

“That sounds nice too... You have a cat? I adore cats, but I can’t get one because Zayn’s allergic. We’ve been talking about getting a puppy.”

****

“Yeah, she keeps me company nowadays. Her name is Gwen.”

****

“I love pets with human names!” Perrie knows she seems silly, but she’s jumping up and down with joy. “I’ll have to come over sometime so I can meet her.”

****

“Yeah, I’d like that...” Jade smiles at her warmly, and suddenly there are no words between them. Perrie tucks her hair behind her hair and smiles down at the table again.

****

“I think my break is over...”

****

“Mine, too. See you around, then?” Jade stands and runs a hand through her hair.

****

“Hopefully” Perrie says with a big smile. She watches her leave and her smile fades, realizing resentfully that it’s time to go back to her boss.

****

With a sigh, she picks up the mess she’d made from her lunch and walks down the hall. Her eyes are on the intricate tile work of the corridor, and when she looks up to see her mentor inches from her she has to stop short, her floral Doctor Martens nearly hitting Mrs. Hunter’s exquisite stilettos.

****

“Oh! I’m so sorry, I—”

****

“Yes, yes, you didn’t see me. There’s no time for apologies right now, we’ve got much to do...” She continues talking, but Perrie’s attention is captured by Jade who is standing behind her mentor.

****

It takes all of Perrie’s concentration and self-restraint to not burst into laughter at the faces Jade is making. She sticks out her tongue and crosses her eyes, places her thumbs on each side of her head and wiggles her fingers, and the funniest yet is that she’s mocking every gesture and word Mrs. Hunter is making. Perrie bites her lip to fight the smile that’s dangerously close to breaking her composure.

****

She thinks she’s made it out clear, although her stomach is aching from suppressed laughter. Her positive outlook is crushed when Jade makes another face that she can’t even describe. Choked laughter escapes, muffled by her hand that flies to her mouth.

****

“What’s so funny?” Mrs. Hunter asks with a raised brow. She turns around and Jade is quick to look like she’s busy doing something at the desk she’s standing next to. It’s Perrie that Mrs. Hunter thinks is odd, though, and she shows it on her expression when she turns back toward her. “Let’s go, Carrie.”

****

Perrie doesn’t even mind the name mix up. She follows Mrs. Hunter obediently, smiling widely at Jade as she passes her. Jade sends her a wink and a quiet giggle before blowing her a kiss. Perrie’s not sure how to respond, so she just sort of twirls a tuft of her hair as she walks backwards away from Jade. It takes a second before she realises she’s blushing, and she abruptly turns forward and sticks her arms rigidly to her side.

****

~~

****

Candles and flowers and satin tablecloths are waiting for Perrie when she arrives at her flat. Something smells heavenly as she shrugs off her jacket and hangs it on the hook by the door. No sign of the boyfriend anywhere, she sits at the elegantly decorated table. The flower petals look soft and velvety, so she strokes one of them and cringes when it flutters down to the table.

****

She quickly scoops up the fallen petal and places it on top of the delicate flower, causing more petals to brush off and fall to the table. At a loss, she simply swipes them off the table and onto the floor.

****

That’s when Zayn comes out of the kitchen with two plates of spaghetti and a large smile.

****

"Oh?" Perrie says in surprise. "Yes, my favorite!"

****

"I know. This is-a special," Zayn insists, in a very bad Italian accent.

****

"Wow, you're such a dork." She smiles widely and her cheeks begin to hurt after a second.

****

"What's happened to those flowers?" Zayn asks when he sits down, eyeing the sad looking flowers.

****

"Don't know," Perrie lies as she kicks the fallen petals further beneath the table.

****

Eating with lipstick was always a challenge, but Perrie Edwards is no stranger to the task. She twirls the pasta around her fork with grace and brings it up to her mouth with expertise. She's almost in the clear until the spaghetti decides to unravel and splatter sauce onto her chin.

****

She sends an icy glare to Zayn when he laughs at the spectacle. It softens when she sees his crinkled eyes even when he's trying to hold back his laughter. Her foot travels closer to his beneath the table as she wipes off her chin.

****

"Twat," she accuses warmly as her foot skims up his calve.

****

Everything on top of the table jumps when Zayn's knee hits it from below.

****

"Perrie, I've been thinking," Zayn states after a few more bites of spaghetti.

****

"Yeah? That's a first."

****

"Are you mocking my intelligence? I'm a med student!"

****

"I'm an intern for one of the fashion world's top designers."

****

"I'd say we're both doing well, then," Zayn adds happily. Perrie loves how he never puts down her work like most straight men would.

****

"So what were you thinking about?" Perrie asks after she sips some wine out of the pretty wine glass.

****

"What?" Zayn asks, confused. He had obviously gotten off track. "Oh, right. I've been thinking about what you said... The other night."

****

"The other night?" Perrie asks.

****

"At Leigh's party," he clarifies.

****

"Oh. And what was that exactly?" She doesn't want to admit she'd drank so much that she honestly didn't remember most of that night. Except for the things she doesn't want to remember. Like the kiss between Harry and Louis. Or grinding with Danielle.

****

"... I just think that maybe you were right, and that it's time. We've been together for a few years now."

****

Perrie tuned in a bit late, and now she's completely lost. She nods despite the fact she has no idea what she's agreeing to. And when Zayn stands up from his seat and rounds the table to kneel next to her, suddenly her face goes white and there's a thousands bumble bees busying themselves in her stomach.

****

It's all a normal thing, she assures herself. Even when he pulls out the little black box he had in his pocket, she's sure it's nothing real and important. Then he opens the box and she wants to hide away from everything.

****

"Perrie Louise Edwards... Will you marry me?"

****

There's a long silence after the question is asked, but it's not silent for Perrie. Her mind is buzzing with apprehension and thoughts of how this could never work out.

****

"Yes."

****

It's practically a whisper, and she's not even sure if Zayn had heard her.

****

"Yes, I will marry you, Zayn Malik. Sorry, your middle name has always been too hard for me to say."

****

Zayn laughs at that, and Perrie is graciously reminded why she loves him so much. They both kind of laugh and cry at the same time before Zayn stands and kisses her deeply.

****

"The ring, the ring," Perrie says quickly after taking a few breaths. She'd almost forgotten.

****

"Oh, right, of course." Zayn moves away from her and holds her left hand and places it on her ring finger. It's perfectly sized and beautiful.

****

"Perfect fit!" She's a bit surprised that he'd known her ring size.

****

"I had to steal one of your rings to be sure I had the right size."

****

"That explains everything, I've been looking for that ring for days now."

****

She stares down at the ring fondly and strokes Zayn’s face. Their pasta is completely forgotten about now. She’s not sure what she was so reluctant about just a few minutes earlier, but everything about this moment seemed absolutely perfect.

****

“I love you,” Zayn says sincerely, looking into her eyes.

****

“I love you, too. So much.” It’s all a bit sappy for Perrie’s taste, but she doesn’t mind.

****

“I’m sure you’ll want to tell all of your friends as soon as possible.” Zayn knows how Perrie was when it came to this type of thing.

****

“They can wait...” Perrie pushes herself from her seat and wraps her arms around her... Fiance. The word is still new in her mind, but she thinks she likes it. Zayn falls backwards at the sudden force and they end up sprawled on the floor laughing like idiots. She presses her lips to Zayn’s, and everything fits perfectly.

********  
  


**H**

****

“Ugh, Perrie, it’s going to be your wedding,” Danielle complains, juggling the many books of color palettes in her arms.

****

“Yeah, really, this is ridiculous,” Harry adds.

****

“Is this mutiny?” Perrie asks absently as she tosses aside a few pictures of flower arrangements.

****

“Yes,” Danielle heaves a sigh as she drops the heavy book onto the table.

****

“Let’s talk about the engagement party,” Harry suggests, flicking at the corners of some of the pages.

****

“Oh, party, yes!”

****

“Right... I’ve got that on my list somewhere,” Perrie replies as she sifts through a stack of papers, possibly in search of the elusive list.

****

Harry’s pocket vibrates, so he retrieves his cell and reads the message.

****

_Just saw two random oranges on the ground, is this your doing?_

_\--Louis_

_**** _

_It takes a lot for him not to burst out laughing. They had conceived an inside joke about oranges one day when Harry was loopy from sleep depravation._

_**** _

_Yes, I planted them for your amusement. x_

_Where are you, anyway?_

_\--Harry_

_**** _

_On my way to do some shopping. My fridge is completely empty._

_Why, are you bored?_

_\--Louis_

_**** _

_Hmm, I wish. Per’s got me busy with all this wedding planning._

_\--Harry_

_**** _

_You’re getting married?_

_\--Louis_

_**** _

_No! Perrie is._

_\--Harry_

_**** _

_Ah, I see. I should probably stop texting... Just ran into a pole._

_\--Louis_

_**** _

_I’ll let you go so you don’t injure yourself. x_

_\--Harry_

_**** _

_See you monday! xx (:_

_\--Louis_

_**** _

“Harry!” Perrie shouts in slight aggravation.

****

“What?” He’s startled enough to drop his phone onto the floor. It clatters painfully, but there doesn’t seem to be any damage.

****

“Coral or light pink?”

****

“They’re the same color.”

****

“What kind of gay man are you?” Danielle teases. “I like the coral better.”

****

“No, they’re the same color.”

****

“Men,” Perrie jokes with a laugh. “Oi, engagement party is this Friday. Bring Charlie, also invite Louis for me?”

****

“Why do I have to invite Louis?” Harry complains and leans back onto his chair.

****

“You’re the one that was smiling down at his texts,” Danielle accuses.

****

“How’d you know that was him? It could’ve been Char. It was him, actually.”

****

“Liar.” Perrie sends him judgeful eyebrows that raise practically up to her hairline.

****

"Fine, fine, I'll invite him."

****

"Good." She finished stuffing the invitation in an envelope and hands it to him. "That's for Louis."

****

"I can't just tell him?"

****

"No, I made up a bunch of invitations, I want them to be used."

****

“You’re ridiculous,” Harry moans.

****

“Oh, come off it. You get to be as ridiculous as you want to be when it’s your time to be a bride.” Danielle shoves him playfully.

****

"Right, like that'll be anytime soon."

****

"Charlie's not marriage material, then?" Danielle asks.

****

"Didn't say that, it's just..."

****

"Louis," Perrie finishes for him.

****

"No." Harry shoots her a glare.

****

"Harry, don't tell me you're-!" Danielle sounds appalled.

****

"I didn't say anything about him! Perrie brought him up!"

****

"And you're the one blushing." Perrie sounds judgemental, but her voice has more of an amused ring to it.

****

“Louis and Harry,” Danielle starts, poking him in the shoulder.

****

“Sittin’ in a tree,” Perrie continues in a singsong voice.

****

“K-I-S-S-I-N-G,” they sing in unison. Harry has his face buried in his face.

****

“Stop.” It’s a strangled moaning sound coming from Harry, and the two girls dissolve into giggles.

****

“No, but cheating is wrong,” Perrie warns.

****

“Don’t know what I’d do if I ever found out Liam wasn’t faithful.” Danielle nods solemnly.

****

“It was just a kiss,” Harry sighs, wanting this conversation to go somewhere else.

****

“You kissed him?”

****

“At the party,” Perrie informs as she files through colour pallets.

****

“ _Harry_.”

****

He dodges the punch from Danielle’s direction and his head falls onto the table without his hands to catch it. “Can we talk about something else? Wow, Perrie, so much planning to do.”

****

“Yeah, actually. Where the hell am I going to sit my parents at the reception? Where’s the reception even going to be? Harry, help me call through this list and see what their reservation schedule looks like. We still need a venue for the actual ceremony. Shit, I’m getting ahead of myself.”

****

Danielle stares blankly at Perrie as she rambles, and it looks like she’s forgotten about Harry’s infidelity and sat down next to Perrie.

****

“Calm down, Per, we’ve got this,” she says soothingly.

****

They continue their chatter about the engagement party and Harry has to force himself to stay awake.

********  
  


~~

****

“Hey, you,” Jade greets warmly when Harry sits next to her.

****

“Good morning, my fair lady.”

****

“You make me blush!”

****

“I generally have that effect on women.” Harry smiles humorously at her.

****

“Wish I did.”

****

“How’s that going anyway? You know, you and your ‘dream woman.’” He rolls his eyes as he takes a sip of his steaming cup of coffee.

****

“Not as well as you and your makeout session with your workplace crush.” She elbows him in the side.

****

“He’s _not_ my crush!”

****

“Alright, sure.” She elongates the vowel sound in “sure” as her finger trails the rim of her mug.

****

“You’re changing the subject! How’s blondie?” He’d never learnt the name of Jade’s crush, so he always called her Blondie, or sometimes Barbie.

****

“She’s fine... Engaged, in fact, I’d say she’s better than fine.”

****

“But you’re not fine.” It’s not a question.

****

“It was stupid anyway,” she says with a humorless laugh. She finds her purse and pulls out an envelope. “Now she’s invited me to the party.”

****

“Engagement party? I’ve got one of those to go to this week too. Must be the weather, all these engagements. You’d think Liam would have been the first to ask Danielle, but that doesn’t even look like it’s going to happen. He could surprise us, I guess.”

****

Harry’s eyes settle on the familiar envelope Jade has plopped on the counter.

****

“And it’s not like I can say no, you know? I’ve already ditched her that first time she invited me to something.”

****

“Perrie...?” Harry reads the invitation carefully.

****

“Yeah, that’s her name.”

****

“No, it can’t be. Perrie Edwards is my best friend.” Harry sets the invitation down and tries to calm his facial expression.

****

“This is no time for games, Harry.”

****

“Where do you work? The fashion place or whatever?”

****

“Didn’t I tell you that?”

****

“No, you didn’t. Perrie is the intern for that mega-bitch fashion designer lady. Don’t know her name, I always tune Per out when she starts rambling.”

****

“Wait, you know Perrie?” Jade is actually laughing now.

****

“Yes, that’s what I was trying to tell you! We’ve been friends since primary school.”

****

“Well, then. This is awkward. I fancy your best friend.” Her laughter continues, and her eyebrows seem to change shape as her whole body starts to shake with it.

****

“It’s funny, actually. There have been many moments where I thought you and Perrie would get on well.” Harry begins to laugh with her. It takes him a second to realise that Perrie probably has no idea about Jade’s feelings toward her. She’s always been slow at that sort of thing.

****

“Guess I’ll see you this Saturday at the party, then.” She pats Harry’s shoulder before she walks out of the coffee shop.

****

Harry decides to take his time walking to the office, even if he has an extra cup of coffee for Louis. He decides that taking his time means he’s not excited to see Louis in the slightest. Even when he takes the lift upward and his heart rate starts to pick up, he plays it cool. He’s not excited to see Louis, he just has a subconscious fear of lifts.

****

He takes more time than usual as he walks by the small cubicles and desks, examining the decorum and trying a different way of walking. One foot after the other, but in a different, more unique way. It takes him a few minutes before he realises how much of a dork he looks like. This is when he takes no time at all in retreating to Louis’ desk, where Louis is waiting for him. He has his feet propped up on the desk, and his desk chair is tilted back as he throws a wadded piece of paper into the air and catches it. He does this a few times before he notices Harry.

****

“You’re late,” Louis scolds.

****

“No, I’m not.”

****

Louis checks his watch and frowns. “Well, you’re later than you usually are.”

****

“Brought you some coffee.” Harry sets the cup next to Louis’ already full mug.

****

“Thank you, that’s sweet.” Louis pushes his mug aside and sips graciously at what Harry brought him. Harry smiles at the small wince he makes, because he knows how cold it’s probably gotten and Louis doesn’t comment on it.

****

“I try to be sweet.” He circles around Louis, causing him to nearly tip over as his eyes try to follow Harry.

****

“Yeah, yeah. You’re actually probably Satan.”

****

“Probably.” He sits on the desk now, smiling down at Louis.

****

“Don’t you have a chair?”

****

“Yeah, but this way I get to see you better. What even is that tie?” He gestures down to Louis’ neckwear.

****

“It’s paisley.”

****

“It’s ugly.”

****

“Rude.”

****

“I brought you coffee!” Harry pretends to be offended.

****

“It’s cold.”

****

“What are you doing this weekend?” Harry asks suddenly, playing with the edges of Louis’ ugly tie.

****

“Nothing.” Louis makes a face at how quickly he had answered.

****

“Great,” Harry says with a smile, pretending he hadn’t noticed. He pulls out the envelope from his back pocket. It’s bent from being folded to fit. “You are cordially invited to Perrie soon-to-be Malik’s engagement extravaganza.”

****

“Sounds fancy.”

****

“Just don’t wear that tie, you’ll be fine.”

****

“Fine, I’ll wear the tie with a cat print on it.”

****

Harry kicks at Louis’ chair, causing him to roll a good foot from the desk. Do they ever even work? The answer is no.

****

**P**

****

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Perrie shouts into the phone. “No, that’s fucking fine, I’ll have a party with no food!”

****

She hangs up and aggressively tosses it onto her bed. She’s not even ready for the party herself, and she can’t decide on which shoes to wear. This day was getting worse and worse by the second. And that’s when she hears Zayn answer the door. Shit, the guests are arriving. Okay, she scrambles around and decides on her pink converse to go over her black tights. She has on a black lace skirt, and a pink button up. It’s too late to change now, so she hurries out of her bedroom and into the main room of the flat.

****

“Isn’t it a bit early?” Zayn asks awkwardly. “Party doesn’t start for another hour.”

****

“I’m always early to Perrie’s parties,” Harry says matter-of-factly.

****

“Hey, Haz.” She says with a relieved sigh as she hugs him. The entire space is decorated beautifully, but there was still no food.

****

“Hey, Pez. Louis should be here in a second, I just spoke to him on the phone. He insisted on coming early to help or something.”

****

“That’s fine.” Perrie smiles, but she’s still not feeling up to anything. Especially a party. There’s a knock at the door, and she’s quick to answer it.

****

“Hi, Perrie!” It’s Louis at the door, smiling widely. He eyes are immediately attracted to his tie.

****

“A cat tie?” She feels rude for not greeting her guest. “I mean, hi!”

****

She opens the door further to let him in.

****

“Oh, god, you were serious?” Harry asks immediately, tugging at Louis’ tie.

****

“I’d never lie, Harry.”

****

They’re both laughing hysterically, and that’s enough for Perrie to be quite finished with this place.

****

“Caterer’s not coming, I’ve got to go grab some things from Tesco to deal with this fiasco.” She’s not paying any attention to anyone.

****

“Want us to-”

****

“No, I’d rather go by myself, thanks.”

****

She grabs her bag and heads out. Her mood is getting out of control, and she almost wants to call everyone and cancel. Her eyes are focused on the dank and cold concrete as she rounds the corner of her building, sighing at nothing. It’s only a block to Tesco, which is no big deal until the first few drops of rain begin to fall onto her face.

****

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” she says to herself as she looks up to the sky and the rain begins to crash down heavily. Without an umbrella for protection, she’s practically drowning in rain. She kicks the brick wall next to her furiously and curses at the pain it causes.

****

“Perrie?”

****

Perrie starts at the sudden sound of her name and flips her head up to see Jade standing there with a purse poised above her head. Perrie was suddenly grateful for the rain, as it was hiding the tears that were forming in her eyes. It takes her a second before she realises that Jade has her hand out, and she takes it. They duck into a shaded alleyway, hiding from the rain.

****

“You alright?” Jade asks carefully, her hand hovering next to Perrie’s face.

****

“Oh, I’m just perfect.” Her answer is sarcastic, and she can hear the break in her voice. Everything is still when Jade wipes the hair out of Perrie’s face and smiles down at her.

****

“Rough day?”

****

“Ugh, the worst. I couldn’t get the streamers symmetrical, my outfit is awful, and the caterer canceled last minute.”

****

“Not the streamers!” Jade mocks her astonishment, causing Perrie to laugh.

****

“Okay, maybe I’m overreacting.”

****

“Maybe you need to have some fun. Isn’t that what parties are for?” The rain is loud, but Perrie doesn’t really mind anymore.

****

“I don’t even want to go back there.”

****

“So don’t.” She’s not sure if Jade is serious or not.

****

“But I’m expected...”

****

“Do you always do the expected?”

****

“Yes.”

****

“Sounds pretty boring,” Jade says with a shrug. “Why don’t you just spend the evening with me?”

****

“That actually sounds... nice.”

****

“I can be nice when I want to be.” She looks to the entrance of the alleyway. “Looks like the rain is settling down. Still need to go where you were going?”

****

“Hmm... No. I want to go somewhere else with you.”

****

“Alight, then. Let’s go call a taxi.” She takes Perrie’s hand and they walk down the alley and into the rain. It’s still coming down steadily, but definitely not as hard as before.

****

They climb into the hailed taxi, and Perrie immediately looks for her mirror. “Oh, lord, look at my hair!”

****

“It looks fine! We’ll go to my flat and clean up before going anywhere else.” Jade gives the driver an address.

****

“Oh, I’ll get to meet your cat!” Perrie smiles widely, and her guilt is fading quickly.

****

“I’m sure Gwen will be delighted to meet you.” 

****

It’s not long before they have to get out into the rain again, but they run up the stairs in a hurry.

****

They’re greeted with a small “meow” and Perrie immediately melts at the sight of the small tabby. Gwen immediately rubs against Perrie’s leg with a purr, and Perrie ends up on her knees petting the affectionate feline.

****

“Looks like she likes you,” Jade comments, placing her bag on the counter.

****

“Not sure what I would have done if she didn’t,” Perrie admits, holding the back of her hand up for Gwen to rub her face against. “Hmm, maybe I can convince Zayn to get a cat instead of a dog.”

****

When Perrie looks up Jade is gone, and suddenly she feels out of place. She stands and roams around the flat, her sneakers squeaking on the tile floor. There’s a small rainbow flag pinned up on the wall. She’s looking at some pictures on the wall when Jade calls out from the bathroom.

****

“Yeah?” Perrie asks when she walks in.

****

“Want me to blowdry your hair?”

****

“Oh, please. It’s a mess.”

****

Jade smiles and pulls a chair in from the bedroom. “Sit down, then.”

****

Perrie closes her eyes in content as the hot air current hits her hair and Jade brushes.

****

“You’ve got such pretty hair.”

****

“Not as pretty as yours,” Perrie hums. She loves the feel of fingers in her hair.

****

“Ever thought of dyeing yours?”

****

“I have, actually. I kind of want it pink. Don’t know if I could pull it off.”

****

“Hmm, I’d think you’d look like a fairy. Perrie the fairy.”

****

“I like that!” Perrie laughs at the rhyme.

****

“Okay, your hair is dry. Do you want to stay in those wet clothes or borrow some of mine?”

****

“Hmm, I’ll borrow some of yours,” she decides with a nod.

****

“I was hoping you’d say that!” Jade grabs her hand and pulls her into the room.

****

“This outfit isn’t that awful, is it?”

****

“No! It’s really cute, actually. Just, come look at mine. I make my own.”

****

“Really?” Perrie is quite impressed at the statement.

****

She looks through the articles of clothing in Jade’s closet. All of them are quality stitched and very pretty.

****

“Like them?” Jade is practically jumping up and down.

****

“They’re amazing! I’ve always wished I could sew. Unfortunately all I can do is draw pretty pictures and hope one day my designs can come to life.”

****

“I could help with that, you know.”

****

“You’d do that... For me?”

****

“Hmm, yeah... For a price.” Jade smirks slightly at her remark, but Perrie’s slightly confused.

****

“Like what?”

****

“I’ll have to think about it. Bring your sketches to work someday, yeah? Here, I did this one with you in mind.” She pulls out a dress that’s light purple and has flowers around the collar.

****

“It’s got pockets!” Perrie exclaims. She remembered discussing with Jade how she never understood why most dresses didn’t have pockets. “It’s perfect.”

****

She immediately begins to take her shirt off and is startled when Jade knocks over some of the stuff on her desk turning around. Perrie smiles at how cute she looks shifting her weight from foot to foot.

****

Deciding to leave her black tights on, she’s done fairly quickly. “You can turn back around now.”

****

She smiles shyly when she does. “It looks just like I thought it would. Please keep it.”

****

“Really? I couldn’t...” Perrie’s fingers play idly with the silk flowers on the collar. “Thank you.”

****

“Right, then. Time for some fun, right?”

****

~~

****

The music is loud, and the lights above the dancefloor are bright. Perrie keeps her hand in Jade’s, afraid of losing her. It doesn’t take long before she’s infected by the music, and her body can’t stay still.

****

Jade seems a bit surprised when Perrie drags her out to the floor, and dances to the music. She’s actually an impressive dancer, and leads Perrie in most of the moves. They even start to sing loudly to some of the songs they recognize. During most of the night they just dissolve into giggles and fall into each other laughing.

****

“Can I dance with you?”

****

Perrie looks up at the voice, unsure of who he was talking to. “Me?”

****

“Yes. How about it?” He’s getting increasingly close, and Perrie begins to feel uncomfortable.

****

“She’s with me,” Jade says possessively, taking her by the hand. Perrie nods and waves the man away.

****

After even more tiresome dancing, Perrie finds her way to the bar where she leans against it.

****

“You alright?” Jade looks concerned, but still has an amused grin on her face.

****

“I’m fine, just a bit winded is all.”

****

“This was fun, yeah? Helped you forget about... What was it you were trying to forget about?”

****

“My engagement,” Perrie says with a sigh, adding “party” after a few moments of silence.

****

“Are you sad you missed it?”

****

“Not at all, actually.”

****

“Good. Want some drinks?” Jade turns around to gesture for the bartender.

****

“I don’t know, last time I drank... Things got kind of weird.”

****

“Alcohol tends to do that.”

****

“I think I should stay sober tonight.”

****

“Alright, then I will too. Sorry, nothing for us.” The bartender walks away a bit disgruntled and confused.

****

“Oh! A free couch, come on!” Perrie tugs on Jade’s arm and they both flop onto the couch. Perrie’s legs feel like jelly after dancing for so long. She looks over at Jade after a few moments because she was being incredibly quiet. “What are you thinking about?” She asks her after wanting to shy away from the intense look she was receiving.

****

“About how breathtakingly pretty you are.”

****

“I get that a lot,” Perrie jokes, laughing until she realises that Jade wasn’t joking at all. “Oh.”

****

There’s a long silence after that, well not exactly silence considering the loud music, but no words are spoken. Perrie watches Jade carefully, because she’s not sure what else to do. She straightens up a bit when she notices Jade beginning to move toward her.

****

“I’m going to kiss you now... Is that okay?” She’s careful with her words.

****

“Yes,” Perrie breathes, swallowing hard and nodding.

****

Jade moves her mouth close to Perrie’s, and Perrie can’t help how much she’s shaking with anxiety. Confident lips touch nervous lips and Perrie’s mind is abuzz with how much she likes the feeling. There’s so much eagerness on Jade’s end that Perrie can’t help but give into the adrenaline rush and kiss back with as much intensity. It lasts for several minutes, and Perrie finds her fingers wrapped in Jade’s hair, and Jade’s arms wrapped around her waist.

****

When they pull apart, Perrie looks down at nothing but her inward shame.  She can’t help the frown that’s painted on her face.

****

“I... I’ve got to go...” She pries Jade’s hands away from her waist and stands, afraid tears might start rolling down her cheeks.

****

“I’m sorry, that was wrong of me,” Jade says in a rush.

****

“No.” Perrie shakes her head avidly before walking away from the girl, hoping that she won’t follow her.

****

“I’m sorry!” She hears again as she’s walking away.

****

When she’s out of the club she checks her phone and fines fifty three missed calls and over a hundred texts. She ignores them with a roll of her eyes. She’d be home soon enough.

****

When she is home, she’s greeted by many worried faces, and Zayn immediately rushes to her.

****

“Babe, are you okay? What happened?”

****

She doesn’t say anything, she just pushes him away and walks toward his room.

****

“Perrie, are you okay?” Harry asks.

****

“Can everyone just go home?” Her voice is harsh and unreasonable, she realises, but she doesn’t care. She just wants to be alone. So she walks into her room and slams the door shut, falling onto the bed with a heaved sigh.

****

She just needs to sleep.

 


	4. Jealousy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry is angry with Charlie, and Perrie spends some quality time with Jade.

** H **

“I’m worried about Per,” Harry admits, watching the subject of his sentence walk past him like a ghost.

“I’m sure she’s fine,” Danielle replies, taking a big sip of her tea. She sets it down with a ghostly smile herself.

“How about you, Dani? Are you okay?”

“I’m always okay.” She kind of laughs, but it’s humorless.

“You’re not fooling me.”

“We’re behind on our rent again,” she explains. She lets her head rest in her hand, her fingers holding up her dark curls. “I don’t know, we’ll work something out. We always do.”

“Things not going well at the bar?”

“It’s always like this, I don’t know.” She sighs. “I guess it’s how it’s meant to be, as long as I’m with who I love.”

“Ever think of doing something besides waitressing?” Harry asks, taking a long sip of his tea.

“Well, yeah. It’s not like I thought I’d be where I’m at right now.”

“So?”

“Okay, if I tell you, you can’t judge me.” Danielle lets her index finger begin to twirl around the tips of her hair.

“Promise.”

“I kind of...always wanted to have my own cupcake business.” She bites her lip and stares down at her coffee, all signs of being incredibly embarrassed.

“That actually sounds really great,” Harry assures her, shifting his position into one that would deem more caring.

“You think so?” Harry can see a sudden light in Danielle’s eyes.

“Definitely. I’ve had your cupcakes before, remember?”

“Sub par cupcakes.”

“Above par! The customer is always right, Danielle.”

“Thank you so much, Harry.” Her voice is genuine and seems to be filled with a bit more hope than prior to the conversation.

“Perrie, come drink some tea,” Harry insists. She’s staring blankly into the fridge.

“I think I’m going to take a nap,” she replies with a sigh, walking toward her room and leaving the fridge open. Danielle and Harry exchange concerned looks.

~~

Harry walks into work with a smile, ready to take on the day. When he makes it to the desk he shares with Louis, he finds his mentor lying flat on the ground and staring up at the ceiling.

“I give up, Harry.”

“On what?” Harry places his bag on the desk.

“Life.”

“Come on, Lou, it can’t be that bad...”

“Shh just leave me be,” he sighs, letting the hand that was resting on his stomach flop onto the ground with another sigh.

“Get up.” Harry kicks him in the side.

“I can’t.”

“Louis, come on.” Harry falls down to his knees and begins to shake him.

“No.” It was more of a groan than a word.

“Yes.” Harry’s not sure why the idea of straddling Louis crosses his mind, and the fact that he actually acts out his plan startles him even more. He’s staring down at Louis now, tugging at his tie and moving his face back and forth. He grasps Louis’ biceps and demands, “Get up.”

“Alright, alright,” Louis agrees, suddenly frantic. Harry realises quickly that Louis actually had gotten up, far before he scrambled out from beneath him.

“That wasn’t so hard, was it?” Or maybe it was.

“Yeah, yep, I’m fine,” Louis replies quickly, crossing his arms and pacing back and forth.

“Do you have to go to the bathroom?”

“No, why on earth would you say that?” Louis turns around quickly and suddenly becomes fascinated by the motivational poster in front of him.

If Harry was honest with himself, he’d say he wants to walk up behind him and let his hand travel from his chest down to the raging hard on he’d received when Harry was on top of him. It takes Harry a moment before he remembers the reason why he’s restraining himself from doing just that before he turns around takes a seat on the desk chair, frowning at the white sheet of paper in front of him.

“You know, on second thought I might actually really need to use the restroom,” Louis says frantically as he passes Harry.

“Have fun,” Harry shouts after him, smiling in amusement.

He spends his wait letting his pencil doodle freely on the paper, not really sure what he’s supposed to do when it comes to finishing the projects they had been working so hard on. Well, “working” was a relative term in many aspects. Harry and Louis had honestly spent most of their time goofing off and flirting as usual. Harry can feel his dimples showing up on his cheeks as he smiles at the memory from moments before; Louis looked petrified beneath him. Also beautiful.

Harry leans back in his chair and rubs his eyes with palms, sighing heavily. He knows he has to stop thinking about this or else he’d need an emergency trip to the bathroom as well. And he’s supposed to be the composed and cool one with a boyfriend.

He has his arms crossed across his chest and is staring stoically at the wall in front of him when Louis returns, a bit red in the face.

“Did you wash your hands?”

“Yes.” Louis’ answer is short and he sits on his chair heavily, causing it to roll back a few inches.

“You’re so cute, I just want to pinch your cheeks,” Harry says, moving his legs so that his chair rolls closer to Louis’.

“Harry, please.” Louis blocks Harry’s hands that are coming dangerously close to his cheeks.

“Aw, come on now.” Harry mocks kissing noises at him and rolls closer.

“Stop!” Louis’ choice of words sounds convincing, but the way he’s laughing loses all seriousness.

They chase each other on their wheely chairs around the small office space, Louis giggling like a madman.

“Hang on, Harry, shhh,” Louis warns with a finger to his mouth. He quickly makes his way to his desk with Harry following him closely. They busy themselves by looking busy. Harry looks up as their supervisor walks by and gives him a nod.

As soon as the supervisor is out of earshot they both dissolve into laughter.

“Good call, Lou.”

“I know the sound of that man’s shoes anywhere. His feet are huge.”

“You know what they say about big feet,” Harry says as he scoots back and places his rather large feet on the desk.

“They wear big socks.”

“Well, it rhymes with socks.”

“You’re hilarious.” Louis rolls his eyes as he pulls out some files that have to do with their projects.

“Oh, trust me, I know.” Harry makes himself spin around in his chair a few times.

“Can you come in tonight?”

“Come where?” Harry sticks his lips out and tries to balance a pencil on his upper lip.

“The office... We’re running behind on our deadlines.”

“Not surprised, really.” Harry continues to spin in his chair.

“If we focus on working today and tonight I think we can catch up.” Louis snatches the pencil away from Harry. “Deal?”

“Yeah, okay.” Harry really isn’t hard to motivate. “What time should I be back tonight?”

“I’ll be here at eight.”

“It’s a date. Let’s get started, then.” Harry grabs the pencil back from Louis and immediately goes back to work.

~~

Harry only has a few hours at home before he has to be back at the office, so he immediately hits the fridge. He plans on leaving a note for Charlie, considering he wouldn’t be getting off until after Harry is going to leave again. He smiles when he finds microwavable mash stored in the fridge. He quickly reads the instructions on the side. It’s kind of funny how he’s done this countless of times before, but habit forces him to read the directions time after time.

“Come on,” he groans impatiently as he watches the container revolve in the microwave.

He decides to bide his waiting time by sorting through the post he’d brought in, frowning at the bills he couldn’t help Charlie pay. He drops the envelopes when the microwave beeps at him, telling him his mashed potato heaven was waiting for him.

He doesn’t bother getting any actual tableware; he simply grabs a spoon and eats his makeshift tea out of its container. He’s only eaten half of his meal when he decides he’s quite finished with it, chucking it in the bin and sighing. He honestly shouldn’t be this bored in his own home.

Harry is caught off guard by the sound of the door opening, and is confused when Charlie walks in. He usually works later than this.

“Hey, babe,” he says, a bit winded. He hangs up his jacket and immediately closes the distance between himself and Harry, hungrily kissing him.

“Hey,” Harry says, gently pushing his boyfriend away. “Why are you here?”

“What, you aren’t happy to see me?” Charlie raises a brow and begins messing with Harry’s belt.

“Yeah, but...” Harry’s thoughts are muddled as Charlie’s fervent spontaneity becomes contagious, and he finds himself responding to every slight movement from the redhead.

Charlie laughs in a low, almost guttural tone as he pulls on Harry’s shirt, guiding him to the bed where he pushes Harry backwards. No time is wasted before Harry pulls Charlie closer on top of him, reveling in the exchange of body heat. They barely have time to even kick off their shoes.

Hair a mess, clothes askew, and sweaty hands feeling skin beneath them, Harry is completely lost in the moment. He can feel that glorious nervous and excited feeling in the pit of his stomach as his pants are pulled off, and Charlie gives him a sloppy kiss on the jaw. It’s just a sloppy hand job, nothing extremely intimate or too exciting, but Harry has his eyes closed and he feels lips that could belong to anyone on his neck. He’s grasping at the shirt beneath his hands, tugging at it, thirsty for the skin beneath it.

“Fuck,” Harry says, feeling the rhythm of the hand all too well. “Louis.”

Everything goes still after he realizes what he’s said, his eyes spring open and he stares at the ceiling for a long time, feeling Charlie’s eyes on him.

“What was that?” Charlie asks. His voice sounds amused.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean...” Harry says quickly, shuffling out from beneath his boyfriend that he feels like he’s betrayed. And in all honesty, he had.

“It’s okay, calm down!” Charlie crawls closer to the retreating Harry, grabbing his hand and smiling at him.

“It’s okay?” Harry asks, his voice anything but relieved.

“Yeah, it’s not a big deal.” Charlie’s voice is annoyingly cheery, and his mouth finds Harry’s again. As if nothing had happened.

Harry pushes him away gently. “I’m sorry, but...”

“What?” Charlie raises a brow, but he still has a smirk at the edge of his mouth. “I said it was fine, Harry.”

Harry has to push him away again, and Charlie sighs in exasperation. He looks at Harry, waiting for an explanation.

“How is it okay?”

“Harry, you’re being ridiculous.” Charlie’s smile falters and he lets his hands rest on Harry’s legs.

“I’m not being ridiculous,” Harry responds angrily.

“I didn’t mean-”

“You’re being ridiculous!”

“Harry, please-” Charlie is completely at a loss.

“I just said someone else’s name! I moaned it, Char.”

“Yes, and we’ve moved past it!” Charlie takes off his shirt and tosses it to the side, ruffling his ginger hair with his right hand.

“I haven’t!” Harry hasn’t been this angry in a long time, and he almost hates himself for it. “I need you to be mad at me!”

“But I’m not mad,” Charlie says truthfully.

“Stop touching me,” Harry snaps as he shoves Charlie’s hands away. He stands up off the bed and immediately begins buckling his pants back up, glaring down at Charlie.

“What’s wrong?” His face is clueless, and his shoulders are slumped.

“I’ve got to go back to work,” Harry explains shortly. He exits the flat without another glance at Charlie, let alone a goodbye kiss.

The crisp evening air does a lot to calm him down, but he still can’t get rid of his irritation. His temper raises a bit when he sees Louis waiting for him at the desk. He’s leaning back in the desk chair, and smiles brightly up at Harry. The entire office is dim from all of the main lights being turned off. The lamp at their desk creates a ball of soft light around them as Harry sits down.

“Hello, Harry,” he hears Louis greet, but after that it all gets kind of hazy. Harry is so wrapped up in his own useless anger at Charlie. He can feel how pointless and putrescent it is, but he continues to feel put off by how Charlie had blown the entire thing off.

“And anyway,” Louis continues whatever it is he’s saying, “We’ve got to get this finished by the end of tomorrow, or else we’ll be screwed. Harry? Are you paying attention?”

“Shut up,” he groans, mostly to himself and his thoughts. “Just shut up... And kiss me, please.”

“Wha-?”

Harry leans over and swallows the rest of Louis’ sentence, placing both hands on either side of his face. He can feel as Louis relaxes into the kiss and begins to contribute to the exchange. He can also feel the smile forming on Louis’ lips, his chest is heaving beneath the hand he moves there. Harry isn’t smiling. Harry isn’t thinking.

 

**P**

It’s been a week since the incident in the club, and Perrie has done everything in her power to avoid Jade at work. It’s not that she doesn’t like Jade, it’s that she does like Jade. It’s a really big problem that she can’t seem to shake. Even when Zayn kisses her she can’t help but think of the girl. Perrie had been distant over the last few days, sure. But her mind has been running a thousand kilometers per hour, reliving stolen kisses and the feel of soft skin beneath her hands.  
The messages she’d received from Jade remained unread, but her picture was still her lockscreen. Perrie frowns at the sight of it now as she walks to the restroom. She’s still looking down at it as she pushes the door open and walks into the girls’ restroom blindly, nearly experiencing cardiac arrest when she almost runs into someone.

“Shit.” Perrie isn’t one for cursing, but this moment seems appropriate. She wants to turn around and retreat quickly, but she’s practically trapped in the victim’s frantic gaze.

“Perrie, please, listen to me,” Jade rattles off nervously. She’s obviously been put off by the sudden encounter as well.

Perrie nods slightly and relaxes her stance, not wanting to say anything because she was afraid her voice would shake. Jade’s eyes widened in slight shock at how easy Perrie had given in, but continued her ranting fluidly.

“I was so out of line for kissing you like that, it was completely unnecessary! And if I could take it back, believe me I would!”

One of the restroom’s patrons passed by then, eyeing them warily. Once she was out of the room, it was only Jade and Perrie left. Perrie is relaxed and practically unreadable, but Jade is a mess of hand motions and shaky words. It touched Perrie’s heart how much Jade wished to atone for her actions.

“It’s not your fault, Jade,” Perrie says smoothly, looking down at the floor and playing with the hem of her sleeve. “It’s mine, really.”

“How’s it your fault? I’m the one that did it!”

“I’m not talking about the kiss,” Perrie says in exasperation. She’s completely at a loss as for what to say to describe what she was trying to. Her throat feels thick, and the tips of her fingers tingle with a slight intensity. “I’m talking about me.”

“There’s nothing wrong with you.”

“You would say that,” Perrie says with a scoff as she rolls her eyes. She finally looks into Jade’s eyes then, revealing the tears that were forming at the rims of her own. “I don’t know who I am.”

“What do you mean? You’re Perrie, I’m Jade. We’re friends. At least, I hope we still are.” Jade looks as if she wants to touch Perrie’s face, but Perrie flinches at her gaze.

“You know who you are. You’ve got a rainbow flag and everything.” Perrie laughs in an almost hysterical manner at how she’s explaining it. “I’m not gay, Jade. I can’t be gay.”

“I know, and I’m okay with it!”

“No, no, you don’t understand.” Perrie lifts her palms to touch her forehead, still at a loss for an explanation. She feels bad for how she’s mucking up the conversation. That’s really all she’s ever done since she was a child. Her lips quivered as a few tears escaped, painting salty lines on her cheeks.

“Explain it to me,” Jade says softly. Perrie can tell she’s measuring the distance between them, trying not to scare her. She must look like a frightened doe that would break with a single touch.

“It’s hard because... I don’t understand. I don’t understand this, for lack of a better word, feeling that you give me. It’s not a feeling, it’s like...a sensation, even.” Perrie must seem like a complete loon.

“Perrie-”

“No, wait, wait, let me talk.” She knows her break is long over, but she doesn’t want to go back to work like this. “I’m not gay, but... I think I might be.”

A look of comprehension spread across Jade’s face and she nodded bleakly. She placed a firm hand on Perrie’s shoulder and smiled reassuringly. “Perrie, it’s okay. I understand.”

“You do?” Perrie’s breathing was still uneven, but it came out less harshly.

“Yeah, and it’s okay. I know you still love Zayn, and I was stupid for thinking even a second that you’d perhaps maybe like me more.”

“No, I mean, yeah, I still love Zayn, but, but, I think I do, you know...” Perrie is losing her sense of speech, and her hands are shaking again. She’s not sure what she’s about to confess, she’s kept everything hidden for such a long time.

“Perrie, calm down.” Jade took her into her arms and gave her a strong hug, letting Perrie bury her tear-ridden face into her shoulder.

Perrie stays there for a long time. She’s happy for the shelter of Jade’s shoulder, what with her face slowly turning into an ugly mess of makeup. Jade is strong yet soft beneath her, her arms wrap around her perfectly. It feels nice and menacing at the same time. She hardly notices that she’s clinging to the fabric on Jade’s back. Her skin is warm and inviting. She smells nice, and the close proximity has Perrie’s head in a whirl of, well, Jade.

“This didn’t quite go the way I had wanted it to,” Perrie admits when she finally allows herself to detach from Jade. She let a small chuckle escape as she wiped at the running mascara under her eyes.

“Me either, in all honesty,” Jade replies with a ghost of a smile. She nibbles quietly on her bottom lip, something that Perrie also does in nervousness.

Perrie hardly gives it a second thought before she finds herself kissing Jade passionately. It’s exactly what she had been so ravenous for, the feeling that she’d fought to keep fresh in her memory. The kiss is bittersweet once it’s over with. She stares at Jade’s surprised expression before she realises what she’s even done.

“Shit,” she repeats. She finds herself running from the bathroom, but only because she’s late from her break. She’d never even used the toilet. Before exiting she turns to Jade, smiling sweetly at her, hoping it’d get the message across. Because words obviously weren’t her strong point.

It takes a second for Perrie to catch her breath as she makes her way back to her mentor. She clutches at her necklace as she accidentally cracks a smile, wanting nothing more than to see Jade again right then and there.

The happiness is short lived when she finally makes it to the office, her work load added onto simply from the irritation of Mrs. Hunter. She hardly notices the extra work, regardless. It’s when she gets home that she’s reminded of why she’s not supposed to be happy.

“Hey, sweetie,” Zayn greets as he kisses her on the mouth. It’s bittersweet, the feel of her fiance’s lips. The fiance that she’d so belligerently betrayed.

“Hey.”

“What shall we have for dinner, then?” Zayn asks as he picks up a few take home menus. “Pizza maybe? Oh, a Chinese sounds good.”

Perrie hangs up her jacket and takes off her shoes absently. She listens to Zayn’s suggestions as she falls back onto the couch, her legs dangling over the arm. “Chinese sounds perfect,” she responds while closing her eyes for only a moment. Well, what seems like a moment. When she opens her eyes, Zayn is gently shaking her arm to get her conscious.

She immediately shoots upright when she’s realised she’d fallen asleep. Wiping beneath her eyes, she looks over to the table where Chinese is sitting in lovely little takeout bins.

“Chinese is here,” Zayn explains as he stands from his crouching position next to the couch.

“Oh, thank the heavens,” she says easily, her hand rubbing at her growling stomach. She sits down at the table with another yawn, stretching her arms up to the ceiling and squeezing her eyes shut.

“Long day?” Zayn asks as he opens his takeout container.

“I guess! Didn’t even realise I was sleepy until now.” She reaches for a pair of chopsticks, but stops short when her phone buzzes in her pocket. She extracts her phone and scans the message quickly, unaware of the smile that is now spread across her face.

  
_Thinking of you. :P_   
_xxJadexx_   


“-and anyway, I just think it would be nice to get away for a bit, what with just getting through with my exams and all that.”

“What were you saying?” Perrie asks with a question mark on her brow. She picks up a piece of chicken between her chopsticks. She loves using chopsticks. They’re more authentic and Zayn doesn’t know how to use them, giving her an excuse to tease him every time they have chinese and he has to use a fork.

“I’m going away with Liam for a weekend.”

“Really?” Perrie asks, a bit louder than intended. Her mind is instantly filled with all the possibilities that a weekend alone could bring her.

“I won’t go if you don’t want me to.”

“What? Why wouldn’t I? Go! Please go.”

“No need to sound so excited, love.” Zayn rolls his eyes as he spears his Kung Pao Chicken with his fork.

“I’m not excited,” Perrie responds quickly, feigning seriousness on her face. It comes out awkward, and her brow is wrinkled in a way it shouldn’t be.

“Um... You’re sure you’re okay with it?” He asks, looking over her face.

“Absolutely. You two need to spend more time together, anyway. He’s your best mate, yeah?” She pats his shoulder firmly.

“Yeah.” Zayn does look reassured.

 

** H **

Harry’s curls are a mess from how much he’s been running his fingers through them, but he doesn’t care. There’s a sinking feeling in his stomach that’s driving him insane. He’s been outside of the office for about twenty minutes now, later to work with every passing minute. His bottom lip is sore from chewing so hard on it out of nervousness. The lump in his throat seems almost permanent, swollen from the guilt that plagued him.

With one last run through his hair, he’s built up the courage to walk into the building. Every step feels like he’s sinking further into a quicksand of depression. After punching his timecard--thirty minutes late-- he slowly trudges toward the cubicle he shares with Louis. Louis. Fuck him, with his beautiful cheekbones and impressionable childishness. It was his fault, really.

Louis.

With one glance at his greeting smile Harry is completely done with the day. He sinks into the chair next to him without a word, glowering at the plan sheets on the desk.

“Someone missed their coffee this morning,” Louis comments as he spins back in forth in half-circles. He’s so cheery and practically glowing. And Harry really had missed his morning coffee.

“Louis...” Harry is shocked at how remorseful his own voice sounds.

“Are you okay?” Louis asks with concern written on his brow. He turns his chair so that he’s looking directly at Harry. Harry wants to touch him.

“I’m fine, I’m fine.”

“Okay, then.” Louis turns back to the desk and pulls out some files.

“Wait, Louis. I need to talk to you.” Harry’s spent far too much time mustering up the courage for this to not go through with it.

“I need to talk to you too, actually.” Louis turns back to his previous position, sweet sincerity on his face.

“You go first,” Harry says.

“No, you go. Mine is kind of important.”

“Okay...” Harry runs a hand through his hair again, sighing deeply. “I just want to be clear about the fact that there can’t be anything between us.”

Louis’ face immediately falls along with Harry’s heart. He’s quick to recover though, shaking his head and even smiling. “Yeah, no, I totally knew that.”

“You did?” Harry asks with slight relief, a bit disappointed that all of his fretting has been for nothing.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I have?” Louis scoffs, turning back to look at the desk.

“I wasn’t exactly straightforward with my feelings,” Harry admits. “I mean, I would have been confused myself.”

“It’s probably easy for someone like you to think someone likes you. Not so much for me.” Louis grabs a pencil and begins writing down a few notes, but they’re mostly just scribbles.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing, just don’t worry about it.”

Harry examines his childhood friend with slight scrutiny,entirely oblivious to whatever Louis had tried to tell him. What type of person is Harry? What type of person is Louis? He decides to question this later. “What did you want to talk to me about?”

“Oh,” Louis seems a bit caught off guard. “Um... They’ve started using a new brand of toilet paper.Just thought I’d let you know... in case...You have any allergies?” He seems pleased with himself at the end of his sentence.

“That was important?”

“Matters of the bum are always important.” His jovial tone seems a bit off.

“Well, that’s true. Thanks, mate.” Harry slaps him on the back.

“No problem... Mate.”

Harry leaves the office that day with an empty feeling in his stomach that not even microwaved mash can fill. He glares at the dark clouds looming overhead that reflect his mood. No amount of angst kicking at the concrete ground can fulfill his angry vibe. He jams his hands into his jacket pockets, feeling the need to look menacing and depressed. His dark mood lasts for days, almost as long as the clouds loom over London.

“Are you alright?” Charlie asks, massaging his shoulders gently.  
Harry shrugs him off aggressively, his anger flaring up even more. “Don’t touch me.”

“Sorry...” Charlie looks at him with a pained expression. His hand flies up to his fringe to fix it, something he always does when he’s nervous or sad.

“No, I’m sorry. You’re not the one I’m mad at.” Harry pulls the fragile looking man into his arms, resting a gentle chin on his head. He nuzzles Charlie’s red hair slightly before staring blankly at a wall behind his head. He feels trapped in his affection for the one he’s holding.

**P**

“You’re sure about this?” Jade asks in a worried tone, biting her lips nervously.

“I-I think so...” Perrie says, just as nervous. She’d never done anything like this before, but it felt right.

“I mean, it looks kind of edible.” Jade prods at the casserole with a fork.

“I don’t understand, I followed the recipe,” Perrie replies in distress, staring at the mess on her plate.

“Is that chicken?”

“No, it’s tune.”

“Oh.”

They both look down at their plates with frowns, moving the food around the plate without eating it.

“We’ve got ice cream in the freezer,” Perrie says.

“Sounds great!” Jade says, picking up her plate and walking over to Perrie’s sink. Perrie heads over to the freezer and grabs the tub of chocolate ice cream. After grabbing two spoons from the drawer she shuts it by slamming into it with her hip.

The two meet at the couch, both excavating the chocolate ice cream with their spoons. A sappy romcom is flickering from the telly, but Perrie’s having a lot of difficulty focusing on the antics of the famous actress. Her hand is centimeters away from Jade’s, just a flicker of motion to the left and they would be touching.

Perrie’s entire body tenses when Jade’s hand makes the first move, barely brushing the side of Perrie’s hand.  
“Think I’m going to put on my PJs,” Perrie says quickly, escaping the couch in one piece. She finds herself locked in the bathroom and staring at herself in the mirror.

She looks over her face, fluffing up her hair a bit with her fingers. She does change out of her clothes into her pyjamas. They’re white with pink polka dots peppering them, and her tank top is a plain black. She stares in the mirror for a few more minutes, not forgetting to floss.

“What are you doing, Per-Bear?” She asks herself, mocking Harry’s deep and condescending voice. She glances quickly at her phone sitting idle on the bathroom counter. Biting her lip she considers it briefly before grabbing it and dialling the number she knew by heart.

“Hello?” Harry sounds a bit tired, and Perrie wonders what time it actually is.

“Harry? It’s Perrie.”

“I’ve got caller ID, Per.” She can practically hear his eyes roll.

“Right, um.”

“Are you alright? It’s almost one in the morning.”

“It is?” Perrie had no sense of time it seems.

“Yes. Are you okay?”

“I don’t know.” Her voice is hushed and her breathing is picking up now, afraid that Jade might hear her conversation.

“What’s going on? Zayn didn’t hit you, did he?”

“No! Never! He’s away with Liam for the weekend.” Perrie finds herself on the bathroom floor with her knees hugged to her chest.

“Has someone broken in? I’ll be right over.”

“No, no! That’s not it.”

“Why’re you whispering?”

“I’ve done something. Well, I haven’t done it yet. But I intend on doing something bad and I want you to talk me out of it, even though I know there’s no chance you’ll be able to talk me out of this. Oh god, Harry. I’m so horrible.”

“What have you done? Perrie you’re not making any sense.”

“I’m hysterical, Harry!” Perrie lets her head fall back and hit the counter softly.

“Calm down? I’m honestly not sure what to tell you, considering you won’t explain anything.”

“There’s this girl...” Perrie says softly, closing her eyes and swallowing hard. She suddenly realises she hasn’t told Harry anything about the situation, which is odd. She tells Harry literally everything. “I work with her and... I think I really like her, Harry.”

“Jade?”

“How did you? What?” Perrie flicks her head forward, suddenly afraid Harry has hidden cameras everywhere in her flat.

“Long story, go on.”

“Okay, well. She’s here.”

“So why’re you on the phone with me, then?”

“Because you’re supposed to tell me not to.”

There’s a long silence, and she’s almost afraid they’ve been disconnected, but she can hear his breaths. She patiently waits for his answer, knowing that it will come in time. Harry always has an answer.

“Just do what you know you need to do. What feels right. Let it all go and don’t think about the consequences. If you know in your heart that this is right, then it is right.”

“Thank you, Harry,” she replies genuinely, clutching at the front of her tank top.

“Anytime, Per.” He disconnects.

With slightly renewed confidence, Perrie leaves the bathroom. Tucking a tuft of hair behind her ear, she looks up at Jade who has changed into pyjamas as well. She’s pulling her hair back into a ponytail when she notices Perrie.

“Oh, hey,” she says with a smile.

“Hey.”

“I can just sleep on the couch,” Jade suggests, fluffing up a pillow and flopping it on the sofa.  
“Oh, I thought...” Perrie trails off, looking down at the ground. “You can sleep with me, you know. If you want.”

“I do want that... But do you?”

“Yes,” she responds a bit too quickly, looking up to see Jade walking over to her. She gets inches away before Perrie turns on her heel and says, “Bed’s this way.”

“Brilliant,” Jade says, following her close behind.

Perrie stares down at the bed she’s slept in many, many nights previous to the current. It seems so foreign now that she’s looking at it, a sinking feeling in her stomach.

“Are you alright?” Jade asks, looking her in the eyes. Something is suddenly caught in Perrie’s chest and she remembers Harry’s words.

“I’m perfect, actually.” She leans in and kisses Jade easily--it’s been done before. There’s something different about this kiss, it’s more fevered and touchy. Perrie can feel the hand that’s making its way up her side. It’s small and new and experienced. Jade’s body is pressed against hers, her curves fitting nicely against her own. When the hand reaches up higher, Perrie pushes her away slightly and uses the excuse of pushing her down onto the bed as to why she stopped her.

Perrie stares down at the girl she’s straddling, reaching around her head to pull out the hair tie she’d just put in a few moments before. There seems to be something caught in Perrie’s throat as she takes in the breathtaking beauty that Jade is radiating. Jade’s hands are placed firmly on Perrie’s hips, waiting patiently for her to make her next move.

In a flash of bravado, Perrie removes her tank top, revealing the lacey bra she’d been too embarrassed to remove underneath. It’s not as though Perrie is inexperienced in sex, she’d had loads... with Zayn. She shakes her head violently at the thought, diving down again to kiss Jade. Her hands frame Jade’s face as she kisses her, letting them fan out around and her fingers to rake through her beautiful red hair. Jade’s hands are making their way up Perrie’s back and she can feel her fingers playing with the strap of her bra.

Her head falls down when she breaks away from the kiss, hiding her face in the crook of Jade’s neck. Jade trails kisses from her earlobe to her neck where the kisses turn to nibbles. Perrie giggles at the contact, and a choked moan is elicited when Jade turns the small actions into a sucking motion and circles her tongue on the skin there.

It feels odd for Perrie to be on top, and it’s evident that Jade thinks the same when she flips the roles around in a single fluid motion without disconnecting from Perrie’s neck. Perrie finds her legs spread open with Jade in between them, her hips moving rhythmically against the thin fabric of her pyjama bottoms. An odd sensation is seeping through Perrie’s stomach, leaving her legs feeling numb as her hands trail up Jade’s back, clutching at her camisole. Her skin feels like heat is radiating from beneath, and Perrie can feel her own blood boiling in response.

Jade looks down at Perrie, capturing the hair that waterfalls down her face and tucking it behind her ear so that she can see Perrie clearly.

“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” She asks softly. Her voice is husky and velvety, Perrie has never heard her speak like that before.

“Y-yeah.” Her argument isn’t very convincing, and Jade stares her down until she comes clean. “Fine, it’s just. I’m nervous, okay? You obviously know what you’re doing.”

“Don’t be nervous,” Jade says reassuringly, stroking the side of her face with her fingertips. Perrie lifts a hand to hold them to her face when she fears Jade is going to remove them.

“Okay.” It’s strong and confident, but Perrie’s heart is still beating at an almost impossible rate. Her face feels hot from blushing so much and she can feel her chest heaving with intakes of nervous air. But it all comes together in a sort of harmonic humming inside of her stomach where butterflies are roaming freely.

It’s only after a long and steady gaze that Jade nods understandingly, realising she was actually okay to continue. She raises her body to take off her cami, revealing all of the top of her body. She repositions herself on the bed and goes straight for Perrie’s collarbone, trailing kisses down to her cleavage that was rising up and down at a steady pace. Her nose skims over the bra as her lips travel down to her upper stomach. With a few more kisses, she’s at Perrie’s belly button where she stops to let her tongue trail back up to the edge of Perrie’s bra. Jade gently pulls Perrie’s pyjama pants off and tosses them carelessly to the floor.

Perrie’s brain is already goo by the time she feels Jade’s mouth on her inner thigh, sweat already forming on her brow. One of Jade’s hands is holding the leg she’s kissing, the other one making its way up Perrie’s other leg. It reaches its destination at the line of Perrie’s matching lace underwear, barely letting the fingertips breech. The blond is looking up at the ceiling with furtive glances down at Jade’s head, her hands having nothing to do but clutch at the sheets.

Jade’s mouth makes the same journey as her hand, looking up at Perrie and making brief eye contact that causes a pang of something nice to shoot through Perrie’s chest. Jade quickly moves to remove Perrie’s panties, and Perrie does all she can to help her out but accidentally knees her in the face.

“Oh, shit!” Perrie shouts, sitting upright and touching Jade’s face where she hit it.

“It’s okay, it’s okay!” Jade says, holding onto Perrie’s fretting hands.  
“Fucking hell, I’m awful! Your face!”

“Is fine,” Jade says, her hands already at Perrie’s sides. She kisses her on the mouth gently, and Perrie melts again at her touch that’s making its way downward again. Perrie pushes away slightly and reaches around to unsnap her bra, taking it off while keeping her eyes locked with Jade’s.

Perrie suddenly feels weightless as she lowers back onto her back, feeling Jade’s tender lips playing their tantalising game at her hip. She stares up at the ceiling with dilated pupils as Jade goes down on her, her legs almost instantly turning to a hapless form of jelly. There’s a frenzy shooting through Perrie’s head as she clutches the sheets beneath wherever her hands fell. She had been nervous as to how she was going to go through with this, but it’s everything she expected and more.

The sounds Perrie is making are foreign even to her, but she’s lost in the feel of Jade’s magic fingers and other abilities. Perrie feels her toes curl unintentionally, and her back arcs up in response to Jade.

There’s suddenly an intensity as large as an ocean in the pit of Perrie’s stomach, and it feels as if waves are crashing down all the way to her toes. Her leg quivers with each ebb of the ocean, preparing for the tsunami. Her mind is goo when it finally hits, her breath hitching violently.

Jade moves positions to where she’s lying next to Perrie now, looking into her eyes. She lifts a hand and strokes her hair out of her face, smiling gently. They don’t really need any words, and that’s completely fine with Perrie. She’s not sure if she could muster up a “thank you.”

They fall asleep under the covers, and Perrie takes refuge in Jade’s slender-yet-strong arms.

The next morning, Perrie wakes up to an empty spot next to her. She feels around, noticing that it’s still slightly warm. Without a word, she pulls on the pyjamas that had been stripped from her the night prior. Jade is in the kitchen cooking breakfast.

“Good morning,” she greets with a cheerful smile.

“Morning,” Perrie replies, a bit less cheerful. She’s never been a morning person, and she doesn’t think she’s capable of hiding that fact from Jade.

“I’m making omelettes.”

“Yum,” Perrie says, a bit more enthused. Her hand flies to her stomach that is suddenly growling from the aromas coming from the rangetop.

“They’re almost done, I was about to wake you.”

“You’re lucky I woke up on my own,” she admits. “I’m a bit of a monster in the mornings.”

“Monster, eh? Think you can be tamed?” JAde slides an omelette onto a plate and sets it on the island.

“Don’t think so.” Perrie grabs a fork from the drawer beside the dishwasher.

“I guess we’ll have to see,” Jade ponders as she walks over to the table with her own omelette. Perrie looks down at her left hand, where her engagement ring is supposed to be. She bites her lip, dreading what she’s about to say.

“I’m not... Going to leave Zayn for you,” she says in a small voice, breaking her heart as she says so. Jade looks down at her plate for a long few moments, moving her eggs around with her fork.

“What am I to you?” She asks, assessing her tone carefully and looking up into her face.

“What do you mean?” Perrie asks with confusion on her brow.

“What do you want from me?” Jade tries to clarify.

“I don’t know...” Perrie admits. “But we still have the weekend, Zayn doesn’t get home until tomorrow evening. I just want... These two days.”

“I really wish I could do that,” Jade says, her tone taking on a more hostile note. She stands and leaves her plate on the table, walking over toward her bag of things.

“Why? What’s wrong?” Perrie doesn’t move from her seat, she just watches with wide eyes.

“I’m so stupid,” Jade says mostly to herself. She grabs a few articles of clothing and tosses them into her bag aggressively. “Perrie, I can’t stay here and risk getting even more feelings for you, don’t you get that? It may seem easy for you, but it’s definitely not for me.”

“I don’t understand,” Perrie admits, putting her fork down and frowning.

“I can’t be your fucking experiment,” Jade says harshly, slinging her bag over her shoulder. “Not when I want more than that.”

“Please don’t go,” Perrie breathes, watching her walk through the door. She can feel tears welling up in her eyes, but she doesn’t want Jade to see.

The door slams and Perrie stays in her spot, suddenly feeling much more lonely than she ever has. Even when she was bullied in school she didn’t feel as horrible as she does now. She suddenly feels exactly like that little girl, throwing away her omelette and taking refuge in a novel.

She’s on chapter seven and the heroine is about to go into battle when her phone starts buzzing on the coffee table. It’s Harry’s number, and she assumes that he’s calling to see what happened, and boy did she have a story to gush to him about.

“Hello?” She answers, setting her book in the spot she’d picked her phone up.

“Hi, Perrie. It’s Charlie.”

“Oh,” she responds with a furrowed brow. “How are you, Charlie?”

“I’m fine. Can I ask you something?” His voice sounds hastened, like he doesn’t have much time.

“Sure, anything!”

“Who is Louis?”

Perrie almost drops her phone at the question. Had Harry seriously neglected to mention everything about what has happened? She purses her lips in judgement at her friend.

“You honestly don’t know? He’s Harry’s childhood mate. Mine too, actually. But it just happens that he’s Harry’s mentor. He’s been spending some time with him, too. Like at that party, and my engagement party. I think they’ve gotten together for coffee or something too.”

There’s a long silence on the other end, and it strikes Perrie that she’s probably said too much. She’s about to say something else in defense of Harry, but Charlie says something before she gets the chance.

“Thanks, Perrie.”

The line goes dead.


	5. Love and Other Bullshit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry finally gives in to his lust for Louis. Tension flares between Harry and Perrie's friendship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know updates have been few and far between, but I am adamant on finishing this series. So believe me, it will be complete one of these days. Thank you for all of your comments!

**H**

 

Soft lips, smooth skin, fuzzy chest, and short brown hair. It’s funny how Harry can assess these little things even in the fevered haste of his hands, eyes, and mouth. He devours every inch of Louis Tomlinson like in every wet dream he’d had of him since he’d hit puberty long after Louis left. He almost laughs at the memory of thinking a boy named “puberty” was going to hit him.

 

Harry pins Louis’ arms above his head, a tattoo catching his glance. It’s a paper plane, surrounded by other tattoos. He examines it momentarily before looking back down into Louis’ eyes. They seem a bit petrified and stunned. Reasonable, really, considering Harry had barged in unannounced and began ripping off his clothes.

 

He kisses him intensely, letting out all of the frustration he’d had pent up since he’d met Louis the second time. Harry’s pants are halfway down his legs as he moves his hips against Louis’, grinding into him with accurate precision. His mouth latches onto Louis’ neck, licking and sucking to leave a sizeable mark. Harry’s fingers lace in Louis’ hair, forcing his head back to expose the rest of his neck which he dominates entirely.

 

“You’re much more experienced than the last time we were in bed,” Louis breathes out unevenly, choking down a moan.

 

“You mean when I was eight?” Harry asks when he’s finished with Louis’ neck. He arches a brow and looks down at him. “Think of that often, pedo?”

 

“No!” Louis says quickly, tensing up beneath Harry’s body. “Well, it’s not like I had much else to go on...”

 

“Well, now you will,” Harry replies mischievously, grinning wickedly before quickly unfastening Louis’ belt. “Ever touch yourself, Louis?”

 

“What?”

 

“You know... Oh, nevermind. You’re too young to understand.” Harry repeats the conversation aloud, reversing the role.

 

“No, tell me now,” Louis laughs out loud, catching onto what Harry’s saying.

 

“Ever touch yourself down there?” Harry’s hands rub impatiently on Louis’ stomach, but he likes the way this is turning out.

 

“When I go to the bathroom, I-”

 

“No, Louis, not like that.” Harry has the entire conversation memorised, and he’s pleased to realise Louis does as well. “Geez, do you even know where babies come from?”

 

“Yes!” Louis can’t help but laugh as he recounts Harry’s side of the conversation, and his cheeks are turning an adorable shade of red.

 

“Yes?” Harry cocks his head to the side as he looks down at Louis, straddling him dominantly.

 

“The sky?” Louis laughs again, and it’s a breathtaking sight staring down at his bare chest and his hair falling onto the pillow beneath him.

 

“No, Louis. People have sex.” It’s hard for Harry to keep it together as well, but he manages somehow.

 

“I’ve heard about that on the telly,” Louis says with a knowing voice, making a face of jovial childhood innocence.

 

“Have you seen it?” Harry’s hands travel up Louis’ chest and trace down Louis’ arms. The dialogue is the same, but the actions are much different than their childhood encounter.

 

“Um, what is it?” Louis looks like he’s given up, and he rises propped up by his hands and kisses Harry softly. Harry pushes him back down flat on his back. He’s not finished with this game yet.

 

“It’s when two people like each other a lot.” Harry raises his brows and rocks his head back and forth with a silly grin. “They sort of hug... But it’s closer than that. And I guess it feels really good. And then boom,” Harry grasps Louis’ biceps and shakes him once for effect. “Babies.”

 

Louis is laughing hysterically now, forcing the words in through his giggles. “And what does touching yourself have to do with that?”

 

“It makes you feel good too.” Harry waggles his eyebrows dramatically.

 

“But I touch myself all the time. I’m touching myself right now.” Louis pokes his arm. “I don’t feel anything.” It’s obvious from Harry’s relentless groping that he is feeling something though, and Harry smirks.

 

“No, it’s not that kind of touch Louis, it’s...” Harry pulls Louis’ pants down and wraps his hand around his cock, pumping up and down gently. “Here.”

 

“Oh,” Louis says, breathing a sharp intake of air.

 

Harry shifts position, bringing his mouth down to suck on Louis, excited to show him the techniques he’s picked up over the years.

 

“Whoa, I don’t think I did that to you when you were eight,” Louis says a bit breathless. Harry ignores him because there’s not much he can say with his mouth full. He bobs his head up and down rhythmically, relishing in the sounds he’s eliciting from Louis’ mouth. He lets his hands rub up and down his chest and stomach, creating a soothing motion.

 

Harry brings his right hand down to latch the shaft as he raises his head slightly, sucking on the tip and creating circular motions with the tip of his tongue. He feels Louis’ back arc up, signaling that it’s time to release him for now. He trails kisses from Louis’ V-line up to his neck and to his jaw and finally to his lips. He can feel Louis’ hard-on prodding at his stomach and it makes him smile slightly into the kiss.

 

Louis is completely submissive, moving into every kiss and moving everywhere Harry moves. Harry’s hands can’t get enough of Louis’ ass as he continues with the rigorous foreplay. He finally frees himself of his own jeans, kicking them onto the floor. Louis is quick to wrap his hand around Harry, pumping up and down as Harry continued kissing him in great severity.

 

“Wait, Harry,” Louis says after a few moments, moving away from him. “I don’t have any condoms in my flat. Speaking of, how did you even know where I live?”

 

“It’s okay, I brought one... And, I might be a crazy psychopathic stalker.”

 

“Oh, well, that’s okay then. You aren’t serious, are you?”

 

“Deadly,” Harry replies in a dark tone, trying to display danger in his eye contact with Louis.

 

“Why do I not even care?” Louis laughs as he pulls Harry in for another long kiss. Harry melts a bit, because this is the first time in the whole evening that he’s kissed him first.

 

He breaks the kiss to pick up his jeans off the floor, fishing through the pocket for the condom that he brought with him. When he returns to Louis, he’s reaching into his bedside drawer and pulling out a bottle of lube.

 

“Knew I forgot something,” Harry says.

 

“Luckily I’m very sexually active... With myself.”

 

Harry grabs the bottle from him with a chuckle, squirting a bit on his hand and rubbing them together to make it warmer. Louis lays back on the pillow again, looking at Harry to reassure him. It’s all really easy after that, preparing Louis, putting the condom on himself, lining himself up, looking down into his eyes. He leans his head down and kisses him once, nibbling at his bottom lip gently, pulling it up slightly and releasing it with a soft pop.

 

Nothing really felt like what Harry feels now. Louis’ hands grasping his hair and neck, his body completely surrendered to him. He can feel his sweat mixing with his own, his body submitting to every thrust and pull. Subtle grunts echo in Harry’s ear and he can feel something buried deep inside his skin. It’s a vague familiarity of something he felt a long time ago, but it’s distant and forgotten.

 

He smiles widely down at Louis after they’ve both climaxed, but it falters when he notices Louis’ distant and sad expression. He moves beside him and takes his face in his hands, forcing Louis to make eye contact.

 

“What’s wrong? Isn’t that what you wanted?” Harry asks him softly.

 

“Yes, it is.”

 

“Then why are you frowning?”

 

“Because you didn’t want it as much as me.” Louis shrugs him off and pulls his blanket up to his chest, looking away from Harry.

 

“What do you-”

 

“I can’t do this anymore, Harry.”

 

The words cut deeply into Harry’s soul, he almost feels as though blood were drawn.

 

“Do what?”

 

“I’m not a fucking toy. You can’t keep expecting me to be here whenever. I’m tired of waiting. I’m probably going to assign you to a new mentor.” The words are biting and cold, so different from the way they had previously been talking.

 

“Why would you do that?” Harry can hear his own voice break, and it shatters even more on the inside.

 

“I think you should leave.”

 

He tries to reach out to touch Louis again, feel that contact they’d shared that he had become so easily addicted to. Louis flinches away and screams, “leave!” his voice is cracking and Harry can tell his voice is thick with tears.

 

He’s defenseless, really. He stands up and walks away from the bed, getting dressed angrily. He feels like a child having a tantrum. He can’t get what he wants, so he gets angry. That’s all Harry really is in the end: a child. Just like when he was a kid with Louis, how he thought of him as a baby with a nightlight.

 

He aggressively pulls on his shirt and slams the door on the way out without another word. If Louis wants him away, then Harry has absolutely no problem with that. Louis has been his problem all along, really. He’s only doing Harry a favor now.

 

He’s still angry when he arrives home, slamming the door behind him. Charlie is sitting on the couch with a mug of tea, awaiting his return.

 

“You’re home late,” he says calmly, taking a sip.

 

“You can tell time, wow that’s cool,” Harry snaps, kicking his shoes off at the door.

 

“I didn’t deserve that.”

 

“I’m sorry,” Harry replies a bit less agitated. It’s not Charlie that he’s mad at. He sits on the couch heavily, leaning his head against his boyfriend’s shoulder.

 

“It’s alright. Rough day?” he asks. His voice seems a bit distant as he talks over his steaming tea.

 

“You’ve no idea,” Harry sighs, nestling his head further into the nape of Charlie’s neck.

 

“Who is Louis?”

 

Harry immediately straightens up and stares Charlie down with a stoic look. “He’s my mentor, you know that.”

 

“You’re right, I do know that.” Charlie leans forward and sets his mug on the table. “But what you failed to mention is that you also knew him as a child. Oh, also that you kissed him? That’s something I did not know.”

 

Everything goes in slow motion for a moment, the way Charlie’s expression goes from calm to angry. The way Charlie wipes his fringe to the side and straightens his glasses when he’s deeply upset about something.

 

“Char...” Harry reaches out and strokes his hair gently. His hand freezes when Charlie jerks away, in a similar manner that Louis had. He clenches his hand into a fist and brings it back to his side, feeling his nails digging into his palms.

 

“I want you to explain. I want you to tell me...the truth.” His voice is frenzied and he’s looking anywhere but into Harry’s eyes. The eyes of a liar.

 

“It was just a stupid kiss when I was drunk,” Harry says in an unfaltering tone. “He means nothing to me, Char. He never has.”

 

He grabs Charlie’s face in his hands, not having to force him to look into his eyes anymore. He strokes his cheek with his thumb soothingly.

 

“You’re the only one that matters to me. I love you.”

  
  


**P**

 

“This is ridiculous,” Zayn says in exasperation. He glances warily at the small radio Perrie has brought into the sitting room. She’s cleared all the furniture from the center of the room.

 

“Shut up and take my hand,” Perrie says with a mischievous smile. She holds out her hand, grabbing hard onto Zayn’s. “I’m going to teach you how to dance if it’s the death of me.”

 

She places Zayn’s hand on her hip and held out his other in the air with their fingers laced. Placing her hand on his shoulder, she begins counting and stepping in rhythm. Zayn tries to follow, but ends up stepping on her feet and cursing.

 

“I can’t do this,” he sighs deeply.

 

“Yes you can! Come on, it’s easy. 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3,” she counts aloud, making him watch their feet as she moves. “There! You’ve got it! Now spin me.”

 

Zayn awkwardly lifts his hand and Perrie spins beneath him, ending facing him again and placing her hand back on his shoulder. Zayn smiles down at her with a look of triumph. At least he didn’t somehow drop her.

 

Perrie places both hands on his shoulders now, gesturing for him to place his hand on her other hip as well. It’s easier this way, just swaying back and forth. Zayn leans down and their foreheads touch intimately. The music somehow becomes quieter and distant as she stares a bit sadly into Zayn’s eyes. Zayn suddenly tilts his head to the right, connecting their lips sweetly. Perrie almost loses herself in the kiss, almost. It’s only a few seconds before she disconnects from him and pushes him gently away.

 

“Our first dance is going to be swell,” she says with a fake smile, letting it falter when she turns from him to turn off the radio. Her phone begins buzzing in her pocket and she looks at the screen, frowning again at how Jade is still her lock screen. She answers the call when she sees it’s from Harry.

 

“Hello?” She asks brightly, happy that at least she knows she has Harry.

 

“Why did you tell him?” His voice sounds enraged.

 

“What do you mean?” Perrie asks with a concerned brow. She looks up to see Zayn eyeing her questioningly. She waves him off, signaling that it’s not a big deal.

 

“You told Charlie about Louis! Why the fuck would you do that, Per?”

 

“He asked me! And honestly, doesn’t he deserve to know?” Perrie walks into her room, not wanting Zayn to overhear the conversation.

 

“Maybe I would have told him! Instead he hears it from you?”

 

“I doubt you would have told him.”

 

“Shut up, Perrie. You don’t even know anything about it! Honestly, I think you should just stick to your own business. You know, that girl you slept with?”

 

“That was different!” Perrie shouts in a whisper.

 

“It’s not different at all. How would you feel if I told Zayn, eh?”

 

“You wouldn’t.” Perrie’s heart begins to pound in her chest and she frantically runs her fingers through her hair.

 

“You’re right. Because I don’t meddle in my best friend’s life. Or should I say former.”

 

“Harry, you’re being unreasonable,” Perrie bites her lip and fights away tears. She suddenly feels like that bullied second year again. Sure, she was bullied after that year as well but it was much more tolerable with Harry by her side.

 

“I don’t think I am. Don’t call me again.”

 

The line goes dead and Perrie can feel her anxiety rising. She tosses her phone on the bed and lets a few tears slip. Had she really screwed up the one constant thing in her life? Of course she did, that’s what she does. She screws things up and people leave her.

 

She screwed up with Jade, she screwed up with Harry. She can’t screw up with Zayn, she just can’t. She already has to a slight degree, but nothing that he knows about. She finds herself on the floor with her knees pulled up to her chest and crying into them.

 

She feels warm and comforting arms around her, and a hand stroking her hair soothingly. Zayn whispers sweet murmurs into her hair, kissing the top of her head. She leans into him willingly, sobbing out incoherent sentences about Harry and how she’s a fuck up.

 

“What did Harry do? Do you want me to punch him?”

 

“No,” she blubbers into his chest, clutching at his shirt.

 

“I’m here, it’s okay.”

 

But it’s really not, it’s really, really not. Perrie feels like the worst human being on the planet. She reaches up and hugs Zayn, pulling him into her tightly.

 

“I need to talk to Danielle,” she says in a small voice.

 

“I’ll call her for you,” Zayn says, grabbing her phone from the bed. “Who’s this on your lockscreen?”

 

“No one,” Perrie says in a sharp voice.

 

Danielle shows up an hour later with a carton of ice cream and a bag of crisps. Perrie’s alone in the flat because Zayn had to go to an evening lecture. Danielle sets the food on the table and brings Perrie in for a big hug, causing her to burst into even more tears.

 

“There, there. Let it out, love.” She rubs sympathetic circles into her back.

 

They sit on the couch with two spoons and the ice cream, laughing about a few things from the past. It hurts Perrie’s throat and chest to laugh after crying so much, but it brightens her mood slightly.

 

“Are you going to tell me what’s going on?” Danielle asks, shoveling ice cream into her mouth.

 

“Harry called me today, and basically ended our friendship.”

 

“What a twat! Why’d he do that?”

 

“Well, Charlie had called me yesterday asking about Louis...”

 

“Ah,” Danielle said knowingly. “And you told him about the kiss?”

 

“Yeah...” Perrie stabs at the ice cream with her spoon, suddenly losing her appetite.

 

“Well, he deserved to know, didn’t he? If Liam was cheating on me, god forbid, I’d want to know.” She takes another bite of ice cream. “I mean, it’s not like you cheated on Zayn or anything.”

 

“Actually...” Perrie stares down at her spoon awkwardly, twisting her mouth into a strange scowl.

 

“Perrie, no...” Danielle sets her spoon in the ice cream bin and waits for an explanation.

 

“It was just...” Perrie tries to say, but somehow even more tears fall down her cheeks as she chokes up. She can’t imagine she’s ever cried so much. “God, I’m such a hypocrite.”

 

“Love, please look at me. You’re going to be okay. Just tell me what happened.”

 

Perrie looks up at her friend with a quivering chin. She’s petrified that Danielle is going to think differently of her.

 

“I cheated on Zayn... With a co-worker.”

 

“What’s his name?” Danielle questions further.

 

“H-her name is Jade.” Perrie looks to the side.

 

“Oh,” Danielle replies, trying to mask her shock. “That’s okay. The cheating part, not so much. But the girl part is totally fine.”

 

“Yeah?” Perrie looks back at her.

 

“Yeah.”

 

“This is her,” Perrie says, pressing the home button on her phone so that the screen would light up.

 

“Well, she’s certainly a pretty thing.”

 

“I think so.” Perrie places her phone back on the table.

 

“Do you love her?”

 

“I don’t know...”

 

“Then what do you know?”

 

“She gave me the best orgasm I’ve ever had.”

 

“Cheeky! Anything else, though?” Danielle picks up her spoon again, not afraid to take another bite.

 

“I miss her. She got upset with me because I said I wasn’t going to break off the wedding.” Perrie wipes a tuft of hair behind her ear as she speaks.

 

“So you’re still going through with it, then? You still love Zayn?”

 

“I think so.”

 

“You only think?” Danielle arches a brow.

 

“I don’t know, Dani, I just don’t... know.” Perrie falls back on the couch, letting her head hit the arm of the couch.

 

“Well, wedding or not, we’re still going through with the hen party.”

 

“I don’t want to party,” Perrie groans.

 

“Yes you do. Get up and get dressed, the girls are meeting us at the club.”

 

With a few more groans of disapproval, Perrie gets dressed and does her makeup in a matter of half an hour. The club is full of lights and foreign faces, all a welcome sight to her. Her friends are in front of the bar, waiting for her and Danielle. They all greet her with hugs and kisses on the cheek.

 

“Let’s get wasted!” Leigh Anne shouts excitedly.

 

“We’ve got a bride to be in the house!” Jesy shouts after her.

 

Eleanor sips on her cocktail with a shy smile.

 

A few more drinks, and Perrie be as wild as the others. It’s nice to be surrounded by friends, forgetting that Harry probably would have been here too if it weren’t for their little spat. She glances to the left and freezes when she sees the couch that she had her first kiss with Jade. She hadn’t even realized this was the same club.

 

“You alright?” Eleanor asks her loudly over the music.

 

“I’m fine!” Perrie lies, taking a shot that was placed on the bar and wincing. “Another, please!”

  
  


**H**

 

Harry walks into the building with a sore body and a sore mind. He finds Louis in their usual cubical. Louis glances up at him and glares back down at his desk.

 

“Louis, please, listen to me.”

 

“Why should I?” Louis straightens a few stacks of paper and places them in the proper file folders.

 

“Keep me as your intern, I’m begging.” Harry reaches for his hand, but Louis recoils and glares at him again.

 

It’s frustrating and enraging and not what he wants at all. He’s not sure what he’s saying before it’s out. He hears himself talking but the words don’t register.

 

“I broke up with Charlie. What you said, it really hit me. You’re what I want, not him.” What’s a few more lies in retrospect? Harry’s deep enough as it is. Lies seem to be the only thing working for him lately.

 

“You... left him?” Louis asks, finally looking him in the face.

 

“For you.”

 

“You shouldn’t have done that...” Louis frowns and looks back down at the papers on his desk.

 

“Why not? You’re all I’ve ever wanted.” Harry’s speaking the truth for once, staring at his neck where there’s a pattern of bruises from him. He lets his finger trace one of them, smirking at the way Louis tenses up beneath him before letting himself relax.

 

“You can stay my intern, I suppose. But can we please finish this damned paper plane ad?”

 

Harry laughs as he sits in his desk chair and props his feet up on the desk. “Take it away, boss.”

 

They spend the day mucking around as usual, but actually get a lot done in retrospect. When it’s time to leave for the day, Harry stops Louis by grabbing at his collar and dragging him back. He puts his mouth next to his ear and whispers “take me home.”

 

Louis clears his throat and nods, gesturing for him to follow. Harry goes through everything in Louis’ glovebox as he drives him back to his flat. Going through anything he could get his hands on.

 

“Oh, you might want to stop at a drugstore and get some condoms,” he suggests with a smirk.

 

With a blush, Louis turns the corner and parks in front of a drugstore as if on command.

 

“I’ll wait in the car,” Harry winks.

 

Louis gets out of the car and Harry watches him with wicked eyes. He taps a beat on the dashboard as he waits for Louis to return. When he glances up, he notices Perrie walking toward the entrance of the drugstore. “Shit, fuck, no.”

 

He watches as Louis opens the door just as Perrie is reaching for the handle. They both have pleasantly surprised looks on their faces and they hug. Harry’s still not happy with Perrie, and honestly didn’t want much to do with her. Although, as he’s watching the exchange he notices that Perrie has been crying, and that she’s doing the thing with her hand when she’s scared about something.

 

Perrie looks toward Louis’ car and makes eye contact with Harry, causing him to sink further into his seat. He watches her as she looks back to Louis and happens to glance down at the box of condoms he’s holding. They exchange what Harry thinks are goodbyes and part ways, Louis coming to sit in the driver’s seat.

 

“Just ran into Perrie,” Louis announces happily.

 

“I saw,” Harry replies with pursed lips.

 

“Why didn’t you get out?” Louis asks in concern. “Trouble in paradise?”

 

“You could say that.”

 

“I have spats with my friends all the time, it’ll pass.” Louis puts the car into gear and drives away from the drugstore.

 

“Maybe.”

 

They ride in silence to the flat, and by the time Louis is inserting his key into the front door, Harry’s completely forgotten about Perrie.

 

He kisses Louis all the way back to his bed. His skin is more familiar now, but not less exciting. Harry still gets this numbing feeling in his skin that’s indescribable. It’s like fire and ice are forging their way into one and inserting themselves into Harry’s skin, shooting through his veins and leaving him breathless. He forgets about Charlie and Perrie and everything, but Louis who’s staring at him intensely and lovingly. This is really what he wants, but he knows he can’t leave Charlie like he wants to. Charlie deserves more than that.

 

It feels like he’s glowing, the way warmth radiates from Louis. It’s homely, and it’s safe, and it’s nice. He wants to hold him forever, and lose time like this.

 

The next day he’s wearing one of Louis’ shirts and smiles into its scent. He sips on some tea and pulls out his phone, alarmed to see a few missed calls from Perrie. He frowns down at it, but he reads the message she left regardless.

 

_I could really, REALLY, use my best mate right about now. :(_

_-Per xx_

 

He notices a voicemail from her too, and is too curious to ignore it. He clicks play and holds the phone up to his ear.

 

“Harry, please.” She’s crying and sounds in distress. “I need you so much, right now. I think... I think I might be pregnant. Please call me back.”

 

Harry nearly drops his tea on Louis’ hardwood floors when he listens to the message. Instead, he places it on the table and glances at a concerned Louis.

 

“What’s wrong?”

 

“It’s Perrie, I...”

 

“Are you going to call her back?” Louis asks, sitting down at the table and looking up at him.

 

“Of course,” he says without hesitation. He grabs his wallet off the counter and puts it in his pocket, dialling the number that he has memorized by heart. “I’ll be back later, promise.”

 

He kisses Louis on the forehead and leaves his flat with the phone placed to his ear as the other line rings.

 

“Hello?” She answers as he makes his way down the stairs.

 

“Perrie, where are you?” He asks urgently, taking a turn to find the metro.

 

“I’m at home...”

 

“I’ll be there in a minute.” He hangs up the phone and climbs onto public transport.

 

He knocks on Perrie’s door quickly, breathing heavily from running so fast. She cracks the door slightly and frowns out at him, as if she’s afraid he’s going to lash out at her.

 

“Perrie, please. Let me come in.”

 

She opens the door the rest of the way without a word. The moment Harry steps in he wraps his arms around her, trying to help her feel protected. She’s such a fragile creature, and Harry remembers the vow he made in second year to protect her. He feels awful as she cries into his chest. He knows that he’s caused quite a few of these delicate tears to escape from her eyes over the past few days.

 

“You’re my best friend, Haz.” She sounds just like she did in year five, when her dad died and she sought him for comfort.

 

“You’re mine, too. I promise I won’t yell at you like that again.”

 

He lets her go and she steps back, wiping at her eyes. “Fuck, I’m such a girl.”

 

“You can say that again,” Harry chuckles as he wipes a tear that she’d missed. “About your message...”

 

“Oh, that...”

 

“How late are you?”

 

“Two weeks,” her voice breaks a bit.

 

“Have you done the test yet?”

 

“No... I was waiting to be wrong. I  bought it yesterday at the... Well, you were there, weren’t you?”

 

“Yeah, about that...”

 

“It’s none of my business,” Perrie says quickly, like a trained dog.

 

“It’s okay... Anyway, don’t you have to pee on a stick or something? Where’s Zayn?” Harry asks, looking around the empty flat.

 

“Yeah, I think so. He’s out with Liam.”

 

“Another lads night?” Harry raises a brow.

 

“I know, right? Like, I get that he’s your best friend, but really?”

 

“A tad bit ridiculous.”

 

They both giggle despite the overlying tension. She walks over to the counter and pulls a small box from a paper bag.

 

“Here goes nothing, I suppose.”

 

“And you’re sure it’s Zayn’s?”

 

“No, it’s Jade’s.” Perrie rolls her eyes and Harry chuckles again.

 

Harry waits as she goes to the bathroom with the box, awkwardly pacing back and forth as he pinches his bottom lip together. He’s sitting on the couch when Perrie returns with a worried look. She sits down next to him and places the white stick on the table in front of them.

 

“What’s the verdict?” Harry asks, placing a reassuring hand on her knee. He glances down at the stick, not entirely sure what the symbols mean.

 

“Too afraid to look,” Perrie admits, and it’s evident that her hands are visibly shaking.

 

“It’s going to be fine no matter what,” Harry assures her, taking a hand in his and patting the back of it.

 

She nods, letting out another shaky breath. It amazes Harry that even in her frenzy she’s still stunningly beautiful. She reaches out and grabs the stick, closing her eyes momentarily before looking down at it.

 

“I’m... I’m not pregnant,” she says slowly, setting the stick down on the table again with what looks like a strangled smile.

 

“Yay!” Harry says quickly, dropping his victorious fists when he notices Perrie’s expression. “That’s... Good, isn’t it?”

 

“Yeah, no, it’s wonderful.” Perrie wipes away a falling tear and smiles warmly. She sniffs quietly, still staring at the stick on the table.

 

“You don’t seem wonderful.”

 

“Don’t know how I feel,” she responds truthfully. Her face is a mix of emotions that Harry can’t read, and it leaves him confused. He’s never felt like this with his best friend, he’s usually able to tell how she’s feeling even before she does.

 

“I guess I was hoping... I don’t know.”

 

“Did you want to be pregnant?”

 

“I wanted to have something that tethered me to him, you know? I feel myself slipping, and...”

 

“If you were pregnant it would have been easier to stay with him,” Harry reads her thoughts.

 

She nods and pulls her knees up to her chest, staring out at nothing. Harry reaches out and rubs sympathetic circles on her back, trying to sooth her the best he can.

 

“God, I’m such a shit! Jade doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore, and I’m single-handedly ruining the best relationship I’ve ever had.” Perrie leans into Harry, and her warmth reminds him of how much he regretted yelling at her previously.

 

“Want to compare? I think I’m worse than you.”

 

“Oh, doubtful. Go on, then, one-up me,” she murmurs into his chest. Harry rests his chin on the top of her head and smirks slightly.

 

“I’ve lied to two people so easily, I didn’t even think of it. Louis thinks I’ve broken it off with Charlie to be with him, and Charlie thinks I have no feelings for Louis.”

 

“Harry Edward Styles!” Perrie shouts in a chastising tone, lifting up and wagging an accusatory finger at him. She breaks down into giggles. “God, we’re such fuck ups.”

 

“You can say that again,” Harry agrees with an amused smile.

 

“At least we’ve got each other,” she muses.

 

“Careful, I messed that up once too.”

 

“I had a big part in that, too.” She looks to the side with a frown before looking back at him with innocent eyes. “Gonna fix it?”

 

“Dunno, everything seems to be going the way I want it right now.”

 

“You’re cheating on two people.”

 

“I know...” Harry looks down at his hands to hide the shamed look on his face.

 

“You’ll figure it out,” Perrie assures as she lifts his head up by the chin. “I’ve got faith in you.”

 

“You, too.” Harry smiles, pulling her into another hug and kissing her on the forehead.

 

“Ugh, why can’t it just be us getting married?” She sighs when they disconnect.

 

“You’re missing a few parts,” he laughs.

 

“Oi! Ever even fucked a woman?” She raises her brow and smirks.

 

“No, but I know you have.”

 

They laugh again as Perrie punches him on the shoulder.

 

“Any plans for the evening, Mr. Styles?” She asks with a flutter of her eyelashes.

 

“Actually, yeah. I’m going out for dinner with Louis and Niall. Want to join? We can make it a thing.”

 

“‘A thing,’” she quotes him and laughs. “Yeah, I suppose I’m free. Zayn gets out of class at five. Oh, can I invite Danielle and Liam?”

 

“The more the merrier, I suppose.”

 

“Brilliant! Zayn gets kind of shy whenever he doesn’t have his best mate around.”

 

“I kind of noticed that.”

 

She leans back on the couch and places a hand on her stomach, sighing down at it. Harry can tell that she’ll be needing him around some more, but he has a few itches he needs scratch.

 

“I’ve got to go, Perrie. But I’ll see you tonight!” He hugs her again, and leaves for his own selfish intentions.

 

~~

 

“I invited Perrie to dinner,” Harry announces as he buttons his shirt up in front of Louis’ mirror.

 

“Oh, I’m sure Niall won’t mind. He’s always complaining about how he never hangs out with straight friends, anyway.” Louis puts on his shoes as he’s talking, sending a smirk up to Harry that is visible in the reflection.

 

Harry doesn’t say anything about how Perrie isn’t exactly straight, because it’s not his story to tell. “Well, that’s good. Because Zayn, Liam, and Danielle will also be joining us.”

 

“Well, this party certainly doubled in size.” Louis’ voice is a bit distant sounding, but closer than it was before. Harry glances to the mirror and notices that Louis is moving closer to him.

 

Louis’ chin is barely able to rest on Harry’s shoulder as his hands travel up the front of his shirt. Harry leans back into him so that it’s easier for the shorter man, a secret smirk ghosting on his face. Louis latches his mouth onto Harry’s neck now, sucking gently while his hands massage his stomach and chest.

 

“Hey! I just buttoned that,” Harry protests when Louis begins to unbutton his shirt with expertise.

 

“We’ve got a few minutes,” Louis mumbles into his neck, turning him around and pressing him up against the counter in front of the mirror. He kisses him passionately as he grinds his hips against Harry’s, the bulges in their pants rubbing against each others’.

 

Louis’ mouth travels from Harry’s neck to his clavicle as he continues to unbutton the light blue shirt. He places a kiss where each button liberates Harry’s flesh. The last button brings Louis’ mouth just above the waistline of Harry’s black skinny jeans. He smiles into the slight turn of his head as his fingers work to unfasten Harry’s jeans.

 

Harry lets out a long breath as he arches his back, pushing his hips against Louis’ face. Louis takes Harry in his mouth then, letting his hands trail from Harry’s thighs up to his chest and down again. Harry’s left hand is in Louis’ hair, and his right hand is keeping him balanced on the counter. He lets his head fall back with his eyes closed, a broad smile creeping across his face that he will keep as a secret personal memory.

 

A rapid knocking comes from the front door, causing Harry’s head to snap up forward.

 

“Are you two wankers ready, yet?” Niall shouts impatiently from behind the door a mere ten feet away.

 

“Erm, just a second!” Harry shouts, realizing that Louis isn’t ready to stop until Harry is completely finished.

 

“Hurry up! I’m about to use my key and force you both out of there. I’m hungry!”

 

Of course he has a key, Harry thinks to himself, but his thoughts are turning into goo quickly. He tries to keep his moaning down, considering that Niall would be able to hear it easily. Harry finds his fingers grasping onto Louis’ locks with more intensity, almost yanking his hair violently as his toes curled inside his shoes. Louis actually moans at the violent outburst, the vibration of his vocal cords driving Harry over the edge.

 

Harry takes his hand off of Louis’ head and bites hard on the side in order to choke down his moan, and his muscles quiver in his legs, almost making him fall over.

 

“Are you two fucking or something?” Niall shouts the question with a few more raps on the door.

 

Harry looks down at Louis now, who is smirking up at him and swallowing. Harry quickly dresses himself again as Louis finds his way back to his feet. He glances over at Harry when he reaches the door, checking to see if Harry is completely ready. With a thumbs up from Harry, Louis opens the door to a very impatient Niall.

 

“About bloody time. Can we go already? I’m starved.”

 

“Let me grab my wallet,” Harry says before walking into the bedroom and grabbing his phone and wallet from the bedside table. He frowns down at a worried text from Charlie, asking why he hasn’t been home in a few days.

 

“You’ve got a little something on your... face,” Niall tells Louis, gesturing to his mouth and chin.

 

“Oh,” Louis says in a flustered voice, wiping it away with his sleeve.

 

“Dear God,” Niall sighs heavily before turning around and walking out the door.

 

Louis looks over at Harry and chuckles, his smile faltering when he sees Harry’s concerned look at his phone. “You alright, there?”

 

“Hm? Yeah, I’m fine,” he says quickly, stuffing his phone in his pocket. He grabs Louis’ hand and walks him out the door.

  
  


The restaurant is crowded when they arrive, but Perrie is quick to find them and pull Harry into a large hug. She sighs in content into his chest and he smiles down into her hair.

 

When they join at the table, Danielle sends a glare in Harry’s direction. It’s deserved, Harry supposes. Zayn is sitting next to Liam as usual, raving over a topic that Harry isn’t keen on. The dinner goes smoothly, with Niall’s jokes and Louis’ witty quips.

 

Before the night is over, Niall’s phone rings. With one glance at who it’s from, Niall answers and gets up from the table quickly.

 

“Hello? Yes, this is Niall...” His voice fades away with the further he walks from the table.

 

“What was that about?” Harry wonders aloud, moving his food around his plate with his fork.

 

“Oh, that’s probably the lawyer,” Louis answers casually before taking a bite.

 

“Lawyer?” Perrie questions with a concerned face. “Is Niall in trouble for something?”

 

“No,” Louis replies with a confused tone. “You mean he hasn’t told you?”

 

“We don’t know anything about Niall, in all honesty,” Harry says with a stab at his food.

 

“Oh...” Louis stops talking when Niall joins them back at the table.

 

“I think I want dessert!” He says with a joyous grin, rubbing his stomach.

 

“Well, that’s not a surprise,” Danielle giggles.

 

“Is that a fat joke?” Niall remarks with a sarcastic pout.

 

“So, Harry...” Danielle looks over at him with a glint in her brown eyes. “Are you and Louis an item now?”

 

“Well, I...”

 

“Dani, there’s no need to discuss that here,” Perrie urges with a nudge from her elbow.

 

“See, I ran into Charlie today,” she continues, ignoring Perrie’s warnings. “He asked about you.”

 

This is it, this is where it all comes crashing down on him, isn’t it? Harry swallows hard and stares down at his peas, unable to look at Louis who is staring holes into the side of his face.

 

“What about Charlie, then?” Louis asks, turning to Danielle. Harry’s head snaps up subtly to look between the pair.

 

“Well, he...” Danielle looks over at Harry then, her eyes softening suddenly. She looks back at Louis. “He’s really broken up, you know? It’s hard losing someone like Harry.”

 

She leans back in her chair and takes a large sip of her wine. Perrie’s shoulders visibly become less tense.

 

“Oh, yeah. I couldn’t imagine losing him now.” Louis grabs Harry’s hand beneath the table, squeezing it gently. Harry feels his heart fall into his stomach, realizing what a dick he’d been over the past few days. But he can’t tell Louis now, not like this or ever.

 

When the dinner is over, Danielle has sized up Harry over a hundred times. Perrie is putting on her jacket as she looks down at Danielle who is still sitting down.

 

“Hey, babe,” Zayn says suddenly. “I think me and Liam are going to grab a few beers after this, is that okay?”

 

“Yeah, that’s fine. Will you be home tonight?”

 

“If I am, I’ll be late.”

 

“What about Harry, Louis and Niall? Did you ask if they want to go?”

 

Zayn’s composure visibly tensed as he looks at the other men for an answer.

 

“No thanks, I’ve had enough wine,” Harry says casually. He can tell when he’s not wanted.

 

“I drink better alone,” Niall insists.

 

Zayn kisses Perrie on the cheek before leaving with Liam. Danielle’s face is stoic as she tucks her hair behind her hair.

 

“I didn’t think Liam drank,” Harry comments as he watches them leave the restaurant.

 

“He doesn’t,” Danielle says in a deadpan voice as she finishes off her wine in a giant swig. She taps her fingers repeatedly on the table. “But boy, do I.”

 

“Come on, Dani, I’ll drive you home,” Perrie insists, placing a hand on her shoulder with a worried frown.

 

Harry watches as a tear falls down Danielle’s cheek. She wipes it away quickly before nodding at Perrie’s offer, standing and grabbing her purse.

 

Harry stands there with Niall and Louis in the awkwardness that followed their exit.

 

“Well, I’d better get home,” Niall says with a stretch of his arms and a feigned yawn. “I think I prefer you lot to the hetero folk anyday. Until next time, losers.”

 

He punches Harry lightly on the shoulder before leaving the restaurant followed by Louis and Harry with intertwined fingers.

 

“So tell me more about Niall,” Harry prompts as he strokes Louis’ hair.

 

“Oh, right... He honestly hasn’t told you?”

 

“No, that guy’s a total mystery. Sometimes he can be so happy-go-lucky and carefree and then gloomy and distant in an instant.”

 

“Like when?” Louis traces circles onto Harry’s chest.

 

“Usually after we talk about romance or something cheesy.”

 

“Ah, that makes sense.”

 

“How?” Harry’s brow raises with the question.

 

“Niall lost his wife in a car accident, a few years ago.”

 

“Oh.” Harry feels as though he’s had the breath knocked out of him. “Why does he need a lawyer?”

 

“You seriously don’t know? Niall has a daughter. His wife’s mum took custody of her after the accident, but Niall’s been trying relentlessly to get her back.”

 

“Oh.” Harry has never thought of Niall as a married man, yet alone one with a daughter. “How old is she?”

 

“She turns 5 in November.”

 

“Wow.”

 

Louis props himself up on his elbow so that he can look down at Harry. He’s drenched slightly in sweat, just enough so that it glistens in the dim light from the lamp on the nightstand.

 

“You’re perfect,” he says softly before lowering his head to kiss him on the lips. Harry complies willingly, letting his hand trail up the curve of Louis’ back.

 

“No, I’m not.”

 

Louis pushes his hand through Harry’s curls before leaning down and nibbling on his earlobe gently and teasingly. “Perhaps not, but you’re good enough for me.”

 

Harry chuckles resistantly into the nibbles. “Hey, I have to go. I’m not staying tonight.”

 

“Why?” Louis almost whimpers.

 

“Just not tonight,” Harry explains, pushing Louis’ hands away from his body.

 

“Fine... I’ll see you at work tomorrow?”

 

“I don’t think we can pull off any more mutual sick days,” Harry laughs.

 

“Probably not.”

 

Harry kisses him one last, fleeting time.

 

It’s extremely late by the time Harry makes it back to his flat. He unlocks the door with quiet precision and turns around to lock it back with the same technique. It’s a practice he’d learnt from his rebellious teenage years, sneaking out of his house.

 

“Where the hell have you been?” a voice booms from behind him, causing him to jump slightly. He turns around with a forced smile.

 

“Charlie, hey, didn’t think you’d be up.” Harry walks closer to him, reaching out to touch him somewhere, but Charlie knocks his hand away.

 

“Answer my question.”

 

“I was just out with friends,” Harry explains easily.

 

“For two days? With no call, no text?” Charlie is obviously furious, and Harry isn’t sure of how to calm him down.

 

“I didn’t think you’d care,” Harry shrugged.

 

“You didn’t think?! You didn’t think I’d?!” His volume escalates quickly with each word and hand gesture. “Fuck you, of course I care!”

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

“No, Harry. You’re not.” Charlie almost laughs out of his grimace. “You’re so _selfish_.”

 

“Me? I’m selfish?” Harry furrows his brow at the accusation.

 

“I know where you were, Harry. You were with him, weren’t you?”

 

“No.”

 

“Stop lying! I know when you’re lying.” Charlie crosses his arms and taps his feet restlessly.

 

Harry opens his mouth to say something but stops and looks to the side with a scowl.

 

“I really hope he was a good fuck, Harry.”

 

“Shut up!” Harry yells in frustration. Charlie has no right to talk about Louis that way.

 

“So you did fuck him, then.” Charlie scoffs, tightening the hold he has on his own arms.

 

Harry looks at the ground without saying anything, leaning against the back of the sofa. Charlie paces back and forth in front of him, rubbing at the sides of his arms.

 

“Honestly, I wish I could say that I cheated on you too,” Charlie says with a chuckle. “But no, I love you too much for that...”

 

“Char...” Harry can feel his heart being torn to shreds with every slicing word.

 

“Don’t call me that. Only my friends can call me that.”

 

“Am I not...?”

 

“I’m honestly debating never speaking to you again,” Charlie admits. His anger is fading, though, and his tone is starting to become saturated with sadness and defeat. “Could you blame me?”

 

Harry simply shakes his head, not wanting to make eye contact with him.

 

“So, I think we should see other people,” he says after a long drawn out silence. “You know, considering you already are.”

 

It’s tinged in hatred and defiance. The words hit Harry hard, and he nods, unable to form words now.

 

“Do you love him?” Charlie asks after a minute. His stance has become more relaxed, and his face has softened.

 

Harry shrugs, still looking to the side of Charlie’s face.

 

“Harry, please. I can’t make you love me when you don’t. Not when you love him more.”

 

Harry nods again, swallowing down the thickness in his throat. “I think... I think I do.”

 

“That’s not enough, Harry.” Charlie steps closer to him and takes his hands in his own. “I want you to love him more than you loved me. Because you deserve that.”

 

He wipes away the tear that’s fallen onto Harry’s cheek and smiles grimly at him. Harry nods once more, this time with a new severity. Charlie grabs the side of his face and kisses his forehead gingerly.

 

“Okay, you need to leave now.” Charlie steps away from him and sits on the couch. “Take whatever you need for the night, and you can come back tomorrow or whenever for the rest.”

 

Harry grabs a few pair of clothes and some personal hygiene products. He reaches for his phone, but realizes that it’s missing from his pocket.

 

Louis answers his front door with a blank face, not surprised to see Harry.

 

“Hey,” Harry says slowly.

 

“You left this,” Louis responds harshly, handing the phone to Harry. It’s opened up to the texts from Charlie.

 

“Louis, I can explain this.”

 

“No, Harry. I’m done with your two-timing bullshit. Goodbye.”

 

The door slams in Harry’s face, and he stands still for a few minutes. With a deep sigh and a few curse words, he sets foot in a different direction.

 

It’s ridiculously late by the time he reaches Perrie’s flat. She’s confused and sleep deprived when she answers, her face lightening up significantly when she notices it’s Harry.

 

“Can I stay here tonight?” His voice is raw and strained. Perrie frowns when she hears it.

 

“Of course, darling.” She opens the door further to let him in.

 

“Is Zayn home?”

 

“Nah, he decided to stay with Liam for the night.”

 

“Danielle’s okay with that?” Harry asks lightly, trying to avoid the subject of anything Charlie or Louis related.

 

“Didn’t ask her,” Perrie shrugs. “Want to sleep with me, love?”

 

Harry nods, setting his bag down beside the couch before walking into her bedroom and collapsing on the bed.

 

“No funny stuff,” Perrie jokes as she climbs into the spot she’d recently left to answer the door.

 

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” Harry smiles lazily. He crawls under the covers too, pulling her into his chest and kissing her on the head.

 

He’s elated to realise that no matter what happens to him, Perrie will always be there to back him up.

 

“Never leave me,” he sighs.

 

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

 


	6. Wedding Catastrophe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Perrie and Harry prepare for the wedding. Once the wedding day comes, a lot of plot devices come into play, causing quite a bit of mayhem. Louis and Harry reunite.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Deepest apologies for how long this took to update. I've gotten caught up in life and it's just terrible. Hopefully this was worth the wait though, because a lot of drama unfolds in this chapter and lives are ruined. Thanks for sticking with me if you're still reading!!

**H**

 

“Harry…” The voice is faint, just out of Harry’s grasp of consciousness. He remains still, with his eyes closed, hoping it will go away and let him sleep. “Harry!”

 

His eyes snap open, and Perrie blurs into view. There’s a look of nervousness on her face.

 

“What’s it?” Harry mumbles as he rubs his eyes gingerly.

 

“You’re coming with me to get my dress, remember?” Her eyebrows are pushed together, forming wrinkles on her forehead.

 

“Can’t your mum go?” Harry asks, rolling over on the couch.

 

“She’s not riding the train in until this weekend,” Perrie says, nudging at Harry for him to move.

 

“Ugh, what time is it?” He wriggles his body until he sits up and faces the less-than-glowing bride to be.

 

“Nine in the morning.”

 

“Feels so much earlier,” Harry yawns.

 

“Probably because you were up late again. What’s with that, eh?” She gestures toward a half empty bottle of liquor.

 

“Self medicating,” he admits with a shrug.

 

“Come on, we have to be at the bridal shop by half past.” She stands and does a small stretch of her own.

 

After Harry is dressed and clean shaved, he checks his phone. There are no messages.

 

“I’ve got a cab,” Perrie says when Harry finally reaches the bottom of the steps in front of her flat. “Did you lock the door?”

 

“Yeah,” Harry replies half-heartedly. He scratches his head absently as he gets in the backseat next to his platinum blonde companion. She seems too preoccupied by her own problems to notice Harry’s, and perhaps it is best this way. “Got butterflies?”

 

“Something like that,” she says with a bite of her lip.

 

“You’ll find the perfect dress, don’t worry.”

 

“Nothing’s perfect, Harry.”

 

The cynical duo walk into the bridal shop with brooding stares in different directions. Harry brings a thumb up and begins to chew on the nail, his hands needing something to do.

 

A cheery woman walks up to them with a broad smile, looking them over with slight trepidation.

 

“Are you my 9:30?”

 

“Yes, I’m Perrie.” She smiles in slight back at the woman.

 

“Ah yes, Mrs. Malik! This way, please.”

 

“Haha, not yet,” she responds in a nervous laughter, following the woman close behind. Harry lifts up a few price tags on the way, raising his eyebrows in shock.

 

“You’re not the groom, are you?” The woman asks condescendingly. Harry raises a brow at her, but Perrie answers for him.

 

“Oh, no, he’s my, erm… Maid of Honor?”

 

“Ah, yes, I see. So many people don’t recognize traditions these days, it’s hard to tell! Don’t let your fiance see you in your dress before the wedding!”

 

“Oh, I don’t plan on it.” Perrie smiles.

 

“Very good! So, do you have any idea as to what you would like?”

 

Harry wanders off as Perrie begins to rattle off different fashion terms that he had never heard of, describing bodice types and lace ratio. It bores him only slightly, but everything has been doing that of late. He finds himself at a table of accessories, and he examines the sparkling jewels carefully.

 

As he walks around the small store, he picks up a top hat from a rack and places it on his head. He almost feels off balance with the tall hat atop his curly mop, but a quick glance in the full-length mirror had him smiling big.

 

“Classy,” he says, pointing two finger guns at his reflection and shooting a cheeky wink.

 

“Harry.”

 

He turns at his name, taking off the hat as he does so. He takes in every inch of his best friend, her radiant beauty astounding him greatly. With a few steps he’s standing right in front of her, grasping her arms and making her turn around for him. The dress has a sweetheart bodice with see through lace sleeves and a poofy peticoated bottom.

 

“Fucking hell, you’re not a defenseless little second year anymore, are you?” Harry’s voice chokes up without intent, and he has to take a step away from her.

 

“Do you like it?” She smiles widely, but there are a few tears rolling down her cheeks going unnoticed by the blushing bride.

 

“It’s beautiful. You’re beautiful.” Harry plays with the veil that’s sitting on her head, making it fly up and fall down with a few flicks of his wrist.

 

“Will Zayn like it?”

 

“Yes.” Harry brushes away her tears and smiles sweetly down at her. He briefly realises how selfish he’d been of late. Her wedding is within a few days, and he’s only been thinking of himself.

 

“We’ll take it,” she tells the clerk, who had been glancing nervously between the pair.

 

“Very well, then. I’ll just need you to take it off first.”

 

“Oh, duh,” she laughs nervously. “Funny thing, back in year five I always thought I’d be wearing this for you, Harry.”

 

“You were pretty naive back then, Per. No one wants me.”

 

She looks at him sadly before turning around and entering the dressing room again, rubbing the back of her neck. There seems to be a red spot there from previous times she’s done this. Harry kicks at the ground as he waits for her to return, tracing the paisley pattern with the tip of his boot.

 

“Alright, are you ready?” She asks as she pulls on her jacket, flicking her hair from beneath the hooded fabric.

 

“Yeah. Can I wear a top hat to your wedding?”

 

“No.”

  
  


~~

 

The handle is cold when Harry touches it, and he almost feels like it’s an omen not to go in. His coffee addiction really does need being seen to, but he’s not in the mood for a personal victory. The moment he opens the door he runs into a body.

 

“Oh.”

 

“Oh,” Harry says back, glancing down at the ground when he recognizes the body he knew so well.

 

“Hey.” It comes as a relief to Harry that Louis doesn’t ignore him entirely. He lifts up his to-go cup and says, “you’ve got me hooked.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Yeah.” Louis smiles slightly, but it’s without emotion.

 

“Listen, Louis, I-”

 

“No.” Louis steps away from him before Harry could utter another sound, and walks out of the door. It’s one of the worst feelings Harry has ever experienced.

 

With a blank look of shock and defeat, Harry sits hard on the stool next to a resigned Jade.

 

“What was that about?” She asks over her cup of coffee.

 

“My life falling to pieces.”

 

“That bad, huh?”

 

“Our lives suck, don’t they?” Harry says with a sigh, leaning forward on the counter.

 

“She told you what happened?”

 

“She tells me everything,” he admits, fiddling with the packets of sugar in front of him.

 

“She may as well marry you.”

 

“Would that hurt less?” Harry asks, crossing his arms on the table and burying his face in the crook. He turns his face with his head still resting on his arms to examine her face as she answers.

 

“I’m not usually like this,” she admits with a grimace. “Either I break their heart, or I get over my own heartbreak within a few days.”

 

A barista walks up to where Harry is sitting. “Need a pick-me-up?”

 

“Oh, yes, please,” he says as he jerks up rather quickly. “My usual, please.”

 

“I should get to work,” Jade says as she sets her mug down with a clink. She reaches down for her bag and jacket and stands.

 

“Wait.” Harry grabs her arm and looks at her. “Are you going to the wedding?”

 

“Seriously?” Jade raises a brow and looks at him as if he’s insane.

 

“I think you should. Be the bigger person. Plus I’d like someone to talk to.”

 

“Fine, I’ll be your date. Pick me up at my place before?”

 

Harry grins widely at her, and pulls her in for an awkward hug where the side of his face is pressed against her stomach.

 

“Write down the address. Also, you wouldn’t happen to have a top hat lying around anywhere, would you?”

  
  


**P**

 

Perrie stands with a towel wrapped around her as she looks into her suitcase with a nervous fuzzy feeling in her stomach. She stares down at the clothes neatly folded and the fancy lingerie her friends at gotten her for the nights on her honeymoon. She bites her lip as she always does when she’s nervous. She knows she has to get to her hair and nail appointment soon, but she finds herself with legs of jelly and a serious air of disappointment.

 

She glances up at her dress, staring down at her mockingly. It’s exactly as she had pictured ever since she was a little girl, but it suddenly looked ugly and unbearable.

 

“Perrie! Why are you not dressed yet?” Her mum asks as she walks through the door with a scowl etched into her face.

 

“Sorry, mum. I don’t think I can get married today…” Perrie sits on the side of her bed and stares down at her toes.

 

Her mother laughs hysterically, causing a look of concern from Perrie. “Nonsense, sweetie! It’s just a bit of cold feet, that’s all.”

 

She sits next to her daughter and hugs her tightly from the side. “This is the biggest day of your life, Perrie. Now don’t screw it up.”

 

Perrie’s not entirely sure if she’s been consoled or not. She dresses herself quickly in a simple pair of denim shorts and a band shirt. Her hair is down and undone, because she figures it’s pointless to even try when it’s all going to be redone anyway.

 

She walks into the living area of her small flat and is pleasantly surprised by who she sees waiting on her with her mother.

 

“Anne!” She sprints to her and hugs her tightly around the waist.

 

“Hello, Perrie.” Anne smiles brightly down at the girl she’d thought of as a second daughter. Having Anne with her made Perrie’s nerves fly out the window only slightly, but it’s a welcome relief.

 

“You know, I always thought that it would be our kids that got together,” Perrie’s mum says with humour in her voice.

 

“Nope, he’s pretty gay, Deborah.”

 

Perrie laughs hard at what’s said, but her mum only fixes her hair and coughs awkwardly.

 

“Yes, well, we’d best get the bride to her appointments.”

 

Perrie spends the better part of the morning being constantly touched by stylists and cosmetologists. She feels like a princess by the time they’re finished. Her hair is in an updo of cascading blonde curls with a small tiara wedged at the top of her head where her veil will sit.

 

“You look stunning,” Anne says when she sees the job that had been done.

 

“Oh, don’t cry, love, you’ll get your makeup everywhere.” Her mother pulls her into a careful hug.

 

“Okay,” Perrie says with a small sigh. “Let’s go get me married.”

 

They arrive at the church long before any of the guests arrive. Perrie walks up and down the aisle a few times, glancing around at the decorations. It’s the fantasy wedding she’d always dreamt of, but somehow it seems so out of place.

 

“Who is walking you down the aisle?” Her mum asks gingerly, referring to the fact that her father is dead.

 

“Harry, of course.” She smiles at Anne.

 

“Well, if anyone has to give Perrie away, it would be him, wouldn’t it?”

 

“Zayn should be here soon, we need to hide you in the dressing room.”

 

The dressing room is already a mess of clothes and strung out bridesmaid dresses. When their entrance is heard, a head peeks out from behind the changing shutter. Leigh Anne smiles brightly and prances over to them in a few strides.

 

“‘Ello, blushing bride.” She grabs one of her arms and begins pulling her away.

 

“See you later, mum!” Perrie calls back.

 

There’s a small mirror that the girls are fighting over, eyeliners as weapons. Harry stands carefully to the side as he watches the frenzy. Perrie immediately runs to him and hugs him tightly.

 

“Why aren’t you dressed yet?” She asks. “Why am I not dressed yet? Guys, get dressed! Where is my dress?”

 

“Calm down, Per.” Harry presses down on her shoulders as if he’s afraid she’s going to blast off at any moment.

 

The hallways are growing louder as all of the guests arrive and mingle with one another. She takes a few deep breaths and nods her head.

 

“Does anyone have any crisps?” She asks with a sigh. Danielle sifts through her bag before pulling out a bag of plain potato crisps. She stands and hands them to Perrie with a smile.

 

“Sure you want a pooch in that dress?” Jesy asks from the mirror.

 

“Oh, bugger off.” Perrie crunches down on a crisp.

 

“Don’t mess up your lipstick,” Eleanor suggests with a wistful look.

 

“It’ll be fine, everything’s fine.” She actually does feel slightly relaxed, but it only lasts until after she gets her dress on and looks into the mirror.

 

Harry walks up behind her as he places a top hat on his head.

 

“Harry, I said no top hat.”

 

“Come on, I look amazing.” Harry admires himself in the mirror, tugging on his bowtie as he does so.

 

She giggles as she watches him. “Alright, fine, I’ve got to admit you do look rather dashing.”

 

“Oh, devilishly handsome,” Leigh says with a wiggle of her brows.

 

“Let him wear it!” Eleanor says with a smile.

 

“Or let me.” Jesy takes it off of his head and places it on her own. “Now I look dashing and devilishly handsome, don’t I?”

 

“Nope, it’s just me,” Harry chides as he takes it back and places it back on his head.

 

Anne walks in just then, taking in the dresses and one tux. “Alright, it’s time for the bridesmaids to line up.”

 

All of the girls follow Anne out of the dressing room with nervous giggles as they latch onto their small bouquets. Danielle turns around and sends one last wiggle of her fingers at Perrie. Suddenly Perrie has to sit down, for her head is spinning far too fast.

 

“Wait a minute,” Anne says in a rushed voice. “The groom isn’t out there yet.”

 

“What?” Perrie almost shouts. She stands quickly and rushes to the door.

 

“What are you doing?” Harry asks as he stops her by grabbing her arm.

 

“I’m going to find Zayn!”

 

“You can’t let him see you in your dress…”

 

“Oh, fuck off!” Perrie rips her arm away and runs down the corridor. She looks in every door possible, even the janitor’s closet.

 

There’s a small group of Zayn’s friends, the groomsmen, milling about in the open corridor. They look a bit shocked to see Perrie.

 

“Have you seen Zayn?”

 

“Last we knew, he was in the changing room with Liam,” says a short one. Perrie feels like she should know his name, but it’s the last thing on her mind right now.

 

Her heart calms a bit with the knowledge of her groom’s whereabouts. She calmly walks down to the end of the hall and knocks on the door that had been designated for the men. She knows that she’s being silly, but she needs to see him as just her fiance one last time. When there’s no answer, she opens the door stupidly. The room is empty at first glance, but she hears a noise coming from the adjacent bathroom. Trepidatiously, she tiptoes her way over to the door way and immediately stops short with what she sees.

 

Zayn’s eyes are heavy lidded as he looks down at the head bobbing up and down at his crotch. With one slight movement from Perrie, his eyes snap open and he pushes Liam away, speaking loudly with words Perrie isn’t able to comprehend. Everything feels a bit fuzzy as she turns away from the scene and drops her bouquet on the floor. She feels Zayn’s hands tugging on her shoulder, beckoning her to turn around but she shrugs them off with a scoff. As soon as the initial haze wears off she turns back towards him with a vicious glare.

  
  


**H**

 

Harry peeks into the chapel warily, looking at all the guests waiting patiently for the ceremony to start. He sees Jade sitting on her own, casually scrolling through her iPhone with the organ playing solemnly in the background. With another glance to the right, Niall catches his attention with a wave and a goofy smile. He points dramatically to Louis who is sitting right next to him and belligerently ignoring Harry, although it goes unnoticed by Niall. Or it could have been noticed by Niall, but he may just be ignoring the ignorance. Harry can never tell with Niall. Regardless, Harry waves back at Niall and smiles warmly.

 

The bridesmaids and groomsmen have all made their way to the front of the chapel, despite the disappearance of the bride, the groom, and the best man. Harry glances at his watch and grimaces at the lateness of the three of them. Suddenly, there’s a loud commotion up the hall.

 

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” The shriek is loud, and the owner is apparent to Harry. He arches his brow and watches down the corridor as suddenly the raging bride bursts out of a door and begins stomping down the hall. Zayn follows quickly behind, trying to sooth her, to calm her.

 

“This entire fucking time?!” She’s near the entrance of the chapel now, and all of the guests are looking curiously toward the back.

 

“Perrie, please listen to me-”

 

“All of those ‘boy’s night out’s’  and your ‘camping trips’” she flips around and creates air quotes with her fingers during the emphasised parts. “All of them were lies?!”

 

“Perrie, can you please calm dow-”

 

“No, you fucking asshole!”

 

The entire audience is in attendance now, including Jade, whose eyes are glazed with worry. Harry stands defenseless between the guests and the quarrelling bride and groom.

 

“This entire fucking time you’ve been sleeping with Liam?! Or do you just let him suck your cock?!”

 

The entire room gasps at her exclamations. Harry turns quickly and looks at Danielle who is standing at the front of the room, her bouquet quivering silently in her hands.

 

“Per-” Zayn starts again, but she puts a hand up and casts her eyes down.

 

“Why did you even ask me to marry you? Did you feel sorry for me?”

 

Zayn doesn’t say anything this time, he just looks at her sadly.

 

“Well the joke’s on you, Zayn. Because I cheated on you too. And I could have chosen her over you, but I didn’t because I had an obligation to you. I stupidly let her go because of you. And I think I might even fucking love her.”

 

The entire scene is starting to get a bit dramatic for Harry, so he tries to wrap it up the best he can.

 

“Come on, Perrie,” he says, grabbing her arm gently.

 

“Take your fucking ring back!” Her voice rises again and she throws the engagement ring at him and stomps away.

 

Niall stands and begins to clap, but quickly realizes he’s alone in the situation.

 

“No? No one? C’mon, that was beautiful.” He shrugs and sits back down next to Louis who has his face hidden in the palm of his hand.

 

There’s a few more moments of silence before Niall speaks up again. “Okay, so no wedding, but do we still get cake?”

 

Louis groans loudly.

 

The guests begin to stand once they realise that what they’ve seen actually happened. Jade grabs her jacket and walks over to Harry nervously.

 

“Shouldn’t you go after her?” She asks him with a frown written on her brow.

 

“I think that should be you,” he admits.

 

“Does she even know I’m here?”

 

“No, but that didn’t stop her from saying those things did it?”

 

Jade nods at him and walks on with a determined look on her face.

 

Harry rubs his temples and blinks a few times before walking over to the bar where the bartender is already serving a few drinks. He orders a vodka tonic and looks to his right where Danielle is taking a shot of some kind of clear alcohol. He scoots over to her without lifting his arms from the bar.

 

“You okay?”

 

“No. But I haven’t been for a while.” She traces the rim of the shot glass timidly as she stares down at it.

 

“You’ve known?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

Harry considers how Liam and Danielle had been in a committed relationship since they were probably in diapers. He had always kind of seen them as the light at the end of the tunnel. the type of relationship that you’re supposed to strive for.

 

“Oh, look, a little umbrella,” he says in fascination when the bartender hands him his drink. He tears it apart with his fingertips with a blank stare. When he looks back up, Danielle has disappeared.

 

“As if I didn’t know Perrie was probably a lesbian,” Leigh Anne says loudly as she crosses the corridor with Eleanor and Jesy flanking her. “I mean, we’re supposed to know that aren’t we? To be supportive or something?”

 

“Do you think we should find her?” Eleanor asks, tucking some of her hair behind her ear.

 

“No, I think she needs some time to herself,” Jesy suggests.

 

“Or with her mystery woman,” Leigh Anne says sensually with a sweet smile.

 

“Ahh,” Eleanor and Jesy say in unison.

 

Harry watches them leave together without even noticing him at the bar. Niall walks up to him with a plate full of white wedding cake. He jabs at it with his fork and nods at him in recognition.

 

“What?” He asks, with his mouth full, when he sees Harry’s arched brow. “There’s too much cake in there to go to waste.”

 

Harry can’t help but laugh at him as he takes a drink.

 

“Oh, seriously, Niall?” Louis sighs dramatically as he walks up to the pair of them. “There’s a time and a place, mate.”

 

“Yes. This is a place where weddings happen, therefore I’m eating wedding cake. I love wedding cake. We had different layers on mi-” Niall stops talking abruptly and shovels more of the spongy cake into his mouth. “Mmm.”

 

Niall looks in between the two of them suspiciously before ducking away and leaving them alone before they realise what’s happening. Harry coughs awkwardly, not wanting to be the first to say anything considering the way it had turned out the last time.

 

“What a show, eh?” Louis starts carefully.

 

“Well, it wouldn’t be a Perrie Edwards production if the crowd didn’t leave astonished.”

 

“In that case, I deserve a refund. I’ve known she’s into fanny since year four.”

 

Harry laughs at that, thinking of little Perrie in grade school with a fond smile. His attention is grabbed by his mum walking toward him. She pulls him into a hug and taps on the rim of his top hat.

 

“You look sharp, dearie.”

 

“Mum, please.” He shrugs her away when she tries to pinch his cheeks.

 

“Who’s this?” She asks, turning to Louis.

 

“Oh, mum, this is Louis… Remember the Tomlinson’s that lived next door when I was in grade school?”

 

“Oh, my goodness.” Harry’s mum’s face lights up significantly when she recognises him. “Of course it’s you, you’re the only one that can ever get this brood to smile like that.”

 

Louis smiles softly at that and looks at Harry who is scratching his head and looking to the side.

 

“My, my, you’ve grown into a nice looking young man. Still a short little bugger, though, aren’t you? How’s your mother?”

 

Louis giggles politely and nods. “She’s doing very well, actually.”

 

“Well, I’m sure you know Harry’s gay, right? Maybe you two could… Y’know?” Harry’s mum winks at him.

 

“Oh my god, mum.” Harry buries his face in his hands in exasperation

 

“Oh, I’m already ahead of you there.”

 

“Yeah?” Her voice picks up a few octaves in excitement.

 

“Yes, I care very deeply for your son.”

 

Harry drops his hands and stares at Louis with a blank expression.

 

“Good. I worry about him often, you know. He needs someone to take care of him.” She reaches out and straightens his bow tie and pinches his cheek before Harry can stop her.

 

“You have my word, Miss Cox.”

 

“Oh, it’s Mrs. Twist now.” She raises her left hand and shows off her wedding ring.

 

“Oh, congratulations!”

 

“Thank you!” She does a small courtsey. “I’ve got to dash, though. A lot of damage control I have to take care of.”

 

“You should get Deborah a shirt like you have, but instead of ‘I love my gay son’ it says ‘I love my gay daughter’,” Harry suggests.

 

“Oh, do you think she’d wear it?”

 

“Probably not.”

 

Harry turns back toward the bar when his mum walks away, eyes cast down at his barely touched drink. There are still confused people wandering about the area with nowhere to go. He feels a warmth next to him as Louis joins him. Harry’s eyes dart to his hand as Louis’ reaches out and touches it gently before lacing his fingers in Harry’s. When he looks up, Louis is already looking at him warmly. Without a word, he reaches up and touches Harry;s face with his free hand.

 

“Should I get a taxi home, then?” Niall asks while taking another bite of cake. Harry’s not even sure when he walked up. “Hello? We carpooled, remember?”

 

Louis doesn’t take his attention away from Harry for a split second.

 

“Alright, fine, I’m taking that as a yes.” He turns around and watches as a girl walks past, glancing sidelong at him. “Hey there,” he says, a piece of cake falling from his mouth and to the floor. She gives him a strange look and scurries away.

 

Harry’s not sure if Niall has left or not, but he doesn’t really care at the moment. His hands feel too still, and Louis isn’t close enough to him.

 

“Come with me,” he whispers into Louis’ ear before leading him away from the bar. They find themselves in the crisp autumn air, and Louis’ back pressed against the brick of the building as Harry glued his lips onto his. The inside of his mouth is warm and pleasant, and Harry thinks of how he never expected this to happen again.

 

“H-Harry, hang on.” Louis pushes Harry away without breaking the contact their bodies share.

 

“I won’t mess up again, I promise. Please believe me, please,” Harry begs, burying his face into the nape of Louis’ neck. “I love you, please.”

 

“Stop doing that.”

 

“Doing what?” Harry looks at Louis in the eyes now.

 

“Groveling. I’m definitely not worth that.” Louis brings his hand up and lets his fingertip fiddle with one of Harry’s curls.

 

“Well, I’m not worth forgiving.”

 

“Fuck that, yes you are. Why do you think I’m here?”

 

“Then why do you think I’m groveling?”

 

“We’re a sad pair, aren’t we?” Louis smiles as he looks almost cross-eyed into Harry’s face that’s getting closer. He sighs happily as he kisses him sweetly, less urgently, but just as close.

  
  


**P**

 

Perrie stares down at the steaming cup of hot chocolate she has cradled in her hands, but her body is still shivering somehow. The backdrop of her white dress-clad lap unsettles her, so she looks up at Jade who is looking at her patiently. She’s still wearing the dress she wore to her circus of a wedding, and she looks absolutely beautiful. Perrie’s sure that her eyes are ringed in smudged black eyeliner, probably even dripping down her cheeks some. Yet somehow it feels like Jade still sees her as the most fascinating individual on the planet. It makes her blush and she sets the hot chocolate on Jade’s table.

 

Suddenly she feels the sting of tears coming on, and she can’t help but hide her face in her palms as she heaves even more sobs; The warmth of Jade’s consoling hand on her knee doesn’t do much for the amount of tears she’s shedding.

 

“What you said,” Jade begins, her voice breaking into the heavy silence.

 

“Oh god, I didn’t know you were there, don’t pay any attention to it,” Perrie blubbers through her palms.

 

“Why would I not pay attention to that? It’s everything I ever wanted to hear you say.” Jade’s thumb does a consoling circle just above Perrie’s knee.

 

“Well, I meant it.” Perrie wipes at the bottom of her eyes, but still isn’t brave enough to look at Jade just yet.

 

“We need to get you out of this dress and into some comfy PJs.” Jade stands and walks to her room, Perrie’s eyes following her passively. She returns promptly with a pair of shorts and an oversized T-shirt. “Do you need some help unzipping?”

 

Perrie nods quietly as she stands and turns around. Jade’s expert fingers unlatch the top button and trail’s down her back with the distinct zipper sound the only thing shattering the silence. Perrie shivers slightly at the air touching her bare back. She takes the clothes Jade had brought her into the adjacent bathroom to change, her modesty getting the best of her. When she’s finished and walks into Jade’s room, Jade has already changed into pyjamas as well. She looks so perfect framed in the soft light of her bedroom lamp, her hair taken down and tossed carelessly. Perrie’s eyes take in the silhouette of her, the perfect contours of her shoulders. Jade

turns around once she realises she’s not alone anymore.

 

“Hey,” she says breathlessly.

 

“Hey,” Perrie mimics her with a small smile etched on her face. She walks closer to Jade, looking at her solemnly before sitting down on the small full size bed.

  
Jade turns down the blankets, allowing both of them to climb in and soak up each others’ warmth. Perrie closes her eyes to concentrate on the feeling of Jade’s arms around her, the sound of Jade’s heartbeat against her ear, the smell of Jade’s shampoo. It’s the best thing she’s ever fallen asleep to. 

**Author's Note:**

> We're going to try and update weekly. We always appreciate feedback. :)


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